I never said I was pretty.... (3744 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 0.88 on 252 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by orphelia - trout faced troll (View user info) at 2008-07-29 16:35:18 EDT
I am annoying, bitchy, and desperate.
I crave attention the same way Method craves cock.
Oh forgive me Uber, I have sinned.
At least I managed to give up the blue eyeshadow. It is now green.
That is all.
User Reviews
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-11-04 22:00:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
get some rags in that hair, missy.
the ringlets are missing.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-04 23:26:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
where do you get off calling yourself a trout?
that's my nickname and i was here way before you were skeevy bitch!
recognize!
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 15:08:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
if they are Walkers Shortbread, you can call them whatever you want
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 15:06:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hehehe it happened to me too, fallen.
it's barts way of making us all look stupid.er.
biscuits = cookies. anything else is just silly talk :)
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 15:03:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow my uber asploded?
I quad replied somehow
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 15:00:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sorry dumpling,
I forgot to turn on my brit-to-yank converter.
Yank definitions
biscuits= crumbly bread/diner roll type things kind of heavy.
dinner rolls= light and bready soft or crusty
scones= very heavy, slightly sweet, sometimes with fruit pieces
cookies= cookies.
glad to bridge your gap
err.
bridge THE gap between us.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:59:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sorry dumpling,
I forgot to turn on my brit-to-yank converter.
Yank definitions
biscuits= crumbly bread/diner roll type things kind of heavy.
dinner rolls= light and bready soft or crusty
scones= very heavy, slightly sweet, sometimes with fruit pieces
cookies= cookies.
glad to bridge your gap
err.
bridge THE gap between us.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:58:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sorry dumpling,
I forgot to turn on my brit-to-yank converter.
Yank definitions
biscuits= crumbly bread/diner roll type things kind of heavy.
dinner rolls= light and bready soft or crusty
scones= very heavy, slightly sweet, sometimes with fruit pieces
cookies= cookies.
glad to bridge your gap
err.
bridge THE gap between us.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:58:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sorry dumpling,
I forgot to turn on my brit-to-yank converter.
Yank definitions
biscuits= crumbly bread/diner roll type things kind of heavy.
dinner rolls= light and bready soft or crusty
scones= very heavy, slightly sweet, sometimes with fruit pieces
cookies= cookies.
glad to bridge your gap
err.
bridge THE gap between us.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:44:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
unless you have a trans-atlantic cock Tate, i'm sure thats not the way things are.
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*crushed*
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:44:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 19:41:59 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
unless you have a trans-atlantic cock Tate, i'm sure thats not the way things are.
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or just a turkey baster and a jiffy bag.
why do americans call those 'biscuit' things (scones, I am sure) 'biscuits'?
you don't eat cookies with meat and gravy.
I dunno. You yanks are a bit weird.
you don't butter biscuits you dunk them in your tea.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
unless you have a trans-atlantic cock Tate, i'm sure thats not the way things are.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:41:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am pretty she the feotus is of
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lol I am such a twat.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:41:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am pretty she the feotus is of asian decent. lets leave the ethnic diagnostics to maury.
i probably won't post it fj, it's pretty personal and i don't wanna make hits and ratings out of such a tragedy.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:27:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fallen, I have a pretty good feeling that that is my negroid child in her stomach.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:17:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 19:08:47 GMT (#)
Ranking: 0
fj, can't complete til little 'uns get home, bathed and bedded, such is my dull exisitence.
I am not so sad no anyway. you cheered me up
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I did? Happy days. You're a sweetheart for worrying about things like that though.
There were redundancies today. Might be more. I think I'm hanging on by the skin of my teeth. Looks like it might be a bleak Christmas in the Bell household.
I'll see your post tomorrow then x
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:16:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
All you clown shoes back off and let the poor woman be.
shameless internet flirting.
she's just leading you on, she knows who butters her biscuts.
dont cha' baby
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:11:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hidden would not have made that mistake.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:11:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I should know not to try and woo a Uberbroad without bringing lot's of +2's.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:10:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sorry.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:09:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
(so are you, sage :)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:08:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
sandy, take your fat zeros elsewhere :-P
fj, can't complete til little 'uns get home, bathed and bedded, such is my dull exisitence.
I am not so sad no anyway. you cheered me up
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:06:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I only came on to see if you'd posted, to offer support.
Yup, still gorgeous.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:04:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 13:48:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
FJ! You topped up your internet!! :)
Sandy, my lady hole is like a Jewish baby, pink, fresh and naturally tight.
Ugh.
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*reaches for the towel*
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-11-20 14:00:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I think you're pretty. :)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 13:48:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
FJ! You topped up your internet!! :)
Sandy, my lady hole is like a Jewish baby, pink, fresh and naturally tight.
Ugh.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-20 13:25:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Pheely, what kind of vagina do you have?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86939
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-11-20 13:21:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pheeley doesn't need perfect teeth - she's got tits that could rival a Caribbean sunset.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:59:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I will be posting shortly, harmon, but it won't be my teeth but the saddest thing you will ever read.
And I lied anyway, I have only four teeth. one crumbled away tuesday.
So you did, fallen. and it is an awesome resoinse to a horrid hate post from a nobody!!
:)
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:53:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I gave this a zero, way back when.
i'm sorry
have a +2
Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:50:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Prove it
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:40:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
chewing balls actually, harmon, shall I nibble on yours?
I have perfectly good teeth for a brit, thanks, all five of them are straight, unfilled and nearly white. Ish.
:)
Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:36:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes but you haven't seen her with her mouth open! She's been chewing rocks!
Submitted by DietCoke (user info) at 2008-11-20 12:22:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dooable.
No alcohol or paper bag necessary.
Not a drought dooable.
Definatly dooable.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2008-11-19 13:12:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-09-25 18:19:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good luck, be well, name your new kid after me!
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2008-08-15 04:53:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yes
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-08-13 07:44:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You do it. I insist!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-08-13 06:40:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ah hahahahaha! Wonderful woman. We're all, we're all very fond of her. Very free-spirited.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-08-07 06:23:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I could dine on your lips for hours.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-07 05:44:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I AM so pretty!
Submitted by sergeantslaughter (user info) at 2008-08-07 04:56:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Your mom sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-05 11:55:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Tee hee, I am making you wait ;)
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2008-08-05 11:47:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I prefer your previous camwhore (not the one on the uberdirectory), and
did you throw my mail in the trashcan? just curious.
carry on.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2008-08-04 13:00:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was a long response; relax.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-03 17:44:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Jinx - I am just about to mail yoooou!
Spooky.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2008-08-03 17:42:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Maaayte what's all this about?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-03 17:41:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-08-03 22:15:35 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
i hope i look as good as you when i'm 50
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Is that the best you can come up with?
And honey, no chance, you don't now, and you are like 12.
lol
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2008-08-03 17:15:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i hope i look as good as you when i'm 50
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-08-03 01:08:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Perineum (user info) at 2008-08-01 15:01:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
...and while you never said you were pretty I'm sure no one else has either.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wtf? Are you fucking four years old? No, just your wit?
It'll catch up one day, don't worry.
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2008-08-03 00:25:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You live in Sherwood Forest? How beautiful! How you don't want to spend, like, YOUR ENTIRE LIFE outside is a mystery to me.
It's not a theme park now, is it?
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2008-08-02 15:12:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Baby fat becomes just fat
after awhile.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-02 12:18:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
FJ has seen my boobies, it's a spell you can't break.
Anyway, scourgey, my little kitten cup cake, is it too late to submit a new picture for Uberdirectory...?
*cowers in corner with hands protectively on head*
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-08-02 11:38:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think I've ever seen a guy get into a bickering match with Orphelia on here and not end up resembling a witless, clueless, bumbling, blithering idiot.
This Sphagnum character is no exception.
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For God's sake man, pull your head out of her cunt. It's fucking pathetic.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-08-01 18:22:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mmmmmmm.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 15:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, but you are wrong gooch.
The blind and the drunk often say I am pretty.
And I am a real hit on http://datingfatty.com/
Submitted by Perineum (user info) at 2008-08-01 15:01:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
...and while you never said you were pretty I'm sure no one else has either.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 14:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.andkon.com/arcade/adventureaction/jellybattle/
Play it.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 14:28:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You got the taste and smell right, gooch.
Your prize is -2's for life.
Hurray!
Submitted by Perineum (user info) at 2008-08-01 14:27:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was going to guess rotten sausage. I am probably the victor.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 14:12:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-08-01 18:27:27 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
What color are your nipples
--------------------------------
Pink. You win a prize.
Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-08-01 13:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm guessing pink
Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-08-01 13:27:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What color are your nipples
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 13:03:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I really don't think I am hideous. Not at all by the way.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-08-01 12:36:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You are so touchy, peri, really. In this multicultural website, there is often a great language barrier.
Could have been chav slang.
Calm down petal. It's only a review.
Submitted by Perineum (user info) at 2008-08-01 12:31:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Obviously it's a typo, you hideous troll. Or is it so satisfying for you to revel in the fact that you caught it that you must sit on the very hinge of uber wanting to hear it come from my mouth that yes, yes indeed it was a typo?
For posterity "dive" was the word I was aiming to type.
Get a face transplant!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-08-01 09:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 16:19:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dife? Not a Polish word.
Who knows, who cares?
=============================
wheres this picture of you as a brunette?
how did I miss that?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 16:19:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dife? Not a Polish word.
Who knows, who cares?
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-07-31 14:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dife?
Submitted by Perineum (user info) at 2008-07-31 10:43:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Good god you are one of the most hideous things that I have ever, and I mean ever, in my life laid eyes on. If I were you I'd set a bear trap and do a swan dife into it as to improve upon that ugly mug. God forgot to wipe when he was creating you.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-07-31 07:21:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah I suppose I'd throw you a sausage if you begged good enough.
Submitted by BurtBurt (user info) at 2008-07-31 04:11:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I just wanked over you, filthy spunk-monkey.
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-31 02:46:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You have GREAT Hair. But I didn't want to say that AFTER the hwole (I tried 3x) "orc" rhinf.
Jwaia christ.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2008-07-30 23:02:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
explains why you obviously hate other women
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-07-30 20:25:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you have a slightly evil looking grin. the same one, in fact, that i have after a few drinks and i'm feeling invincible, which usually occurs when i'm having spectacular luck with the ladies.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-07-30 20:22:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good job holding your own, girl.
i like your hair too, btw. although i did like that picture of you as a brunette also...
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-07-30 16:55:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
holy fucking heat
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2008-07-30 13:53:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
trog faced, you mean?
Submitted by Dill (user info) at 2008-07-30 13:51:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i wouldnt catch this trout on my pole...
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-30 13:31:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
good grief whats happened here
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2008-07-30 13:16:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Trout-faced" British slang I guess. What feature exactly make you trout-faced?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:29:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Of course I have a scarf! I am from Scotland remember. For most of the winter only my eyes are visible.
Specs? But my eyesight is fine...shall I just get a 0.5 pair from the chemists for £1?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:24:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You need the bag for press conferences. and specs, tell me you have some clear glass specs and an old university scarf??
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:22:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 16:13:53 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Huzzah!! Well done, though surely fashion would have been better than sports?? more appropriate?
~~~~~~~~~
I tried to get a position within the horoscopes team but they didn't have any :o(
I just got a confirmation email instructing me that the 'dress code is smart - no jeans or trainers, as you will be expected to go to press conferences etc. with the sports journalists.'
PRESS CONFERENCES?! Haha that will be mega.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Huh? No, no I wasn't going to do the 'heat' comment, not at all.
i was just gonna let you get it out your system and move on.
You have been insulting, but fun.
lets do it again sometime?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:16:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"The superior person"???
You obviously aren't listening. Next you'll tell me that I'm some kind of sucker for heating up your post again. Insight like that is very hard to come by. I can't believe you tricked me. The fact that your post is getting heat has such a significant impact on me.
Before you roll that old chestnut out, I thought I'd address it for you.
Goodnight.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:13:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Huzzah!! Well done, though surely fashion would have been better than sports?? more appropriate?
Muddy, you don't complain that a certain Brit is so far up your bottom he is suffering from scurvy through lack of sunlight??
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:10:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, I am Oathy. Can't believe it took you numpties so long to figure it out.
But never mind that - I have just been offered a placement on a sports desk for a national newspaper! Huzzah!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:08:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-30 16:05:57 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry kiddo, I actually leave my house and interact with real people. I doubt you can say the same. By the way, who watches your kids, since obviously it's not you?
-----------------------------------
Whoa, stooping low.
they go to a summer group, which they love. Basketball, trampolining, football, arts and crafts, rounders, swimming etc.
They chose to go.
meanwhile, I try to do some work, a post of which I will be putting up shortly. I think I am rather talented.
I am only ever on the PC when not with my kids.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
One dimensional?? Ok. Whatever point you are trying to prove, do it.
If you want me to say 'oh, you are right, what a terrible peron I am, i take the internet waay too seriously' blah blah consider it said.
Clearly, you are the superior person here. My bad.
Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:05:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sorry kiddo, I actually leave my house and interact with real people. I doubt you can say the same. By the way, who watches your kids, since obviously it's not you?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think I've ever seen a guy get into a bickering match with Orphelia on here and not end up resembling a witless, clueless, bumbling, blithering idiot.
This Sphagnum character is no exception.
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For God's sake man, pull your head out of her cunt. It's fucking pathetic.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:05:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So F.J Bell is an Oathmeal alter.
Way to be, you fucking limp-wristed, raisin balled coward
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:03:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yes, it's a mystery.
There is no element of consistency or transparency about what I do here.
This is who I am:- http://www.ubersite.com/u/Sphagnum
Everything you ever wanted to know about Sphagnum
User id: 16703
Registered on or around: 2005-02-24 04:01:52 EST
# Messages posted: 214
# Reviews written: 11481
# Times these posts have been reviewed: 7318
# Hits: 226763
Average rating of all messages: 0.54
Although you are very clearly of the opinion that this site is somehow a popularity contest, that is not the way everyone sees it. I don't give a fuck whether anyone likes me or not. I don't come here to make friends particularly with one dimensional losers like yourself.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:03:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-30 16:01:11 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You go girl! Good job rallying the mouthbreathing Ubertards! You must feel so special right now, since this is obviously the way you measure your worth.
-------------------------------------------------------
I think you have issues.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:01:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You are trying to rattle my cage, Sphaggy? Why? Why even bother with me?
you make no sense.
And bleaching my hair is an insult??? What???
Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-30 11:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You go girl! Good job rallying the mouthbreathing Ubertards! You must feel so special right now, since this is obviously the way you measure your worth.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:59:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Nice armour, Romeo.
I suggest you adjust your criteria if that's your perception of how things are going to work out.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:57:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:52:53 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 00:45:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:35:22 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 00:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:18:18 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're not really ugly, you just have that worn look that people generally get after they turn 70.
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Split personality?
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Actually, I have the lowest standards of any member of the male species on the face of the earth. The fact that I would need to drink and indeterminable amount of alcohol in order to even contemplate touching you is more insulting than a simpleton like you will ever be able to comprehend.
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So low, even your sister is an appealling option.
Chances are, death wouldn't stop me from fending you off even if you tried anyway.
Jesus, you make no sense.
Being knocked back by you is supposed tobe insulting?? It is a fucking gods send!!
--------
I don't have a sister. Not a good insult because it has too much of an opportunity to backfire.
Death would make you more appealing and would probably be the only condition in which I would seriously consider "doing things" to you.
I do make sense and my name's not Jesus.
I was thinking about correcting the grammar in this sentence but it would have given you a reverse mohawk on its way through. Instead, I'm going to assume that you are trying to defend yourself frantically and therefore, are not concerned with the errors you have made.
Just out of curiosity, what evidence are you basing your assessment of me on? What makes you so sure you wouldn't start leaking if I was standing in front of you?
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Hehe I am not defending myself at all, I happen to be having fun.
This makes me miss sico.
Correct all you like, how are you so sure English is my first language?
The only post I remember of yours is a 'camwhore' of some very classless whore, sat on the bed looking like Jodie Marsh only in worse underwear.
But you are a guy.
So, who are you? is this an Uber mystery?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think I've ever seen a guy get into a bickering match with Orphelia on here and not end up resembling a witless, clueless, bumbling, blithering idiot.
This Sphagnum character is no exception.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:53:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're awesome!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:52:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 00:45:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:35:22 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 00:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:18:18 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're not really ugly, you just have that worn look that people generally get after they turn 70.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Split personality?
-----
Actually, I have the lowest standards of any member of the male species on the face of the earth. The fact that I would need to drink and indeterminable amount of alcohol in order to even contemplate touching you is more insulting than a simpleton like you will ever be able to comprehend.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
So low, even your sister is an appealling option.
Chances are, death wouldn't stop me from fending you off even if you tried anyway.
Jesus, you make no sense.
Being knocked back by you is supposed tobe insulting?? It is a fucking gods send!!
--------
I don't have a sister. Not a good insult because it has too much of an opportunity to backfire.
Death would make you more appealing and would probably be the only condition in which I would seriously consider "doing things" to you.
I do make sense and my name's not Jesus.
I was thinking about correcting the grammar in this sentence but it would have given you a reverse mohawk on its way through. Instead, I'm going to assume that you are trying to defend yourself frantically and therefore, are not concerned with the errors you have made.
Just out of curiosity, what evidence are you basing your assessment of me on? What makes you so sure you wouldn't start leaking if I was standing in front of you?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:49:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:47:05 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
A minute ago you didn't know who I was.
Do you read this shit before you press the "rank" button or is "reading" one of those things they only talk about in the movies?
---------------------------------------------------------
Word on the street is, you are ugly.
Or method.
'fess up.
(your put downs are weak, weak)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ratty! Oh, the streetfight explains your absence. Are you affiliated to any particular gang? Do you have a street name? How exciting.
Remember what the English Government warn, if you carry a knife, statistics show, YOU are the one likely to be stabbed by it.
So carry it in a quick release case and watch your step so not to trip over.
(I am cool, and pregnant still thanks!)
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:47:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
A minute ago you didn't know who I was.
Do you read this shit before you press the "rank" button or is "reading" one of those things they only talk about in the movies?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:45:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:35:22 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-31 00:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:18:18 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're not really ugly, you just have that worn look that people generally get after they turn 70.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Split personality?
-----
Actually, I have the lowest standards of any member of the male species on the face of the earth. The fact that I would need to drink and indeterminable amount of alcohol in order to even contemplate touching you is more insulting than a simpleton like you will ever be able to comprehend.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
So low, even your sister is an appealling option.
Chances are, death wouldn't stop me from fending you off even if you tried anyway.
Jesus, you make no sense.
Being knocked back by you is supposed tobe insulting?? It is a fucking gods send!!
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:44:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:40:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow! That got boring pretty quickly.
You're not very smart, are you Goldilocks? You might want to learn to sarcasm before you end up cutting yourself unnecessarily.
I guess you are the disgusting, female version of Rob_berg and ETS.
"Pay attention to me, I'm a fucking social retard"
Make that your new mantra.
Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ahhhh you are pretty. I also now wear green eyeshadow, to cover my black eyes, as I have now taken up streetfighting... anyhow nuff about me, you look fuckin well babe, how ya keeping?
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:32:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm the website's built-in MRR refresher. You're talking to an automatic script every time you address me so do yourself a favour and stop humiliating yourself.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:29:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEAT
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks. I really like my hair. I have had a few low lights put in to break up the blonde,it looks pretty. you can't see but it is really long, I just have shorter layers at the side.
I didn't enjoy being brunette for one second and blonde roots look awful.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:26:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
your hair looks great.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:20:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:18:18 BST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're not really ugly, you just have that worn look that people generally get after they turn 70.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Haha could you be any more wrong you twit??
Who are you anyway?? I think you are less tolerated than myself.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're not really ugly, you just have that worn look that people generally get after they turn 70.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:14:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-07-30 15:06:03 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Why are you wearing Zubaz around your neck?
------------------------------------------
Ahahahaha! 'Fashion'.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2008-07-30 10:06:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why are you wearing Zubaz around your neck?
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-07-30 09:25:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 09:00:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You, me, a bucket of KFC, I think we'd be happy Sgt.
=============================================
Like I've said before, a woman after my own heart.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 09:00:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You, me, a bucket of KFC, I think we'd be happy Sgt.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:35:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks Sgt H!
=====================
I got your back.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:38:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-07-30 13:34:13 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
always about food with that guy
-----------------------------------
Match made in Heaven.
:)
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:37:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
always about food with that guy
===============================
its known as "Shtick"
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:35:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks Sgt H!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
always about food with that guy
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:31:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
British my arse Orphelia!!
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:28:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Orphelia, you look strikingly similar to Emma Bunton in this picture, thusly making you an adorable pop tart!
and we all know what happens to pop tarts around me!!
and dont listen to these haters on here, you're hot.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:20:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am as British as Mad Cow Disease!!
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-30 08:18:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well she's not british really!
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-07-30 07:30:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you look british
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-07-30 07:20:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We would have such incredible sex.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 06:36:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Lordy, I made that comment faster than rob berg.
I need an Uber break. Good job my new house doesn't have a landline yet.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 06:31:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have! I am hot, too hot for Method who is at least a six pint pull if I ever saw one.
Love them beer goggles.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-30 06:27:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
holy shit the level of self deprecation on this post is fucking overwhelming, didn't I tell you to take it down a notch, you self-loathing hole?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-30 04:23:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-30 03:24:35 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
every single on of these virgins would love a go on you.
myself included.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
But you still hate me, right?!
I hope to god that 'infected finger' isn't a slang term for something else, emission??
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 03:57:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The blurriness just adds to your charm.
You do realise that now this pic is public I'm gonna need a new private one so I feel *special* again.
Submitted by Scy_fy_junkie (user info) at 2008-07-30 03:45:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not English??
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-30 03:22:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have an infected finger
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-07-30 01:27:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You look a little bit like Christina Ricci... or she looks a bit like you.
I'm undecided.
And now I don't care again.
Funny how that works.
Nice pic anyways.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:45:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEAT HEAT HEAT
Submitted by tatersninja (user info) at 2008-07-29 23:55:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:43:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well you're British, I'll kindly thank you not to EVER open your mouth
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I would assume that, since she's a woman.
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2008-07-29 23:50:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I also noticed that you covered your neck after the liverspots crack earlier
Submitted by iambetteratit (user info) at 2008-07-29 23:46:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Pic looks a little better than the one on the other post. You still have this smug little grin that screams "SLAP ME LIKE A DISOBEDIENT UNDERAGE RUSSIAN SEX SLAVE" though, might want to work on that.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2008-07-29 23:09:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I wouldn't say you are either.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2008-07-29 22:24:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
every single on of these virgins would love a go on you.
myself included.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-07-29 21:36:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ha.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 20:07:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 20:03:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:57:53 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have hairy toes and love grilled cheese sandwiches.
---------------------------------
Greek/American??
-------\\
No thanks. I've already had one. Bet she's fat now.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 20:05:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have never met a gay Pole.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 20:03:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:57:53 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have hairy toes and love grilled cheese sandwiches.
---------------------------------
Greek/American??
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-29 20:00:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There are no gays in poland, apparently. I know a guy called Pawel who had to come over here so he could live as gaily as he did wish.
His family back home still think he's straight.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:57:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have hairy toes and love grilled cheese sandwiches.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:54:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have dual nationality/personality.
I have the rosey cheeks and love kabanos.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:53:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
damn
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:53:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
polski. You withered old prune :)
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:51:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
kidding. couldn't resist
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:50:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Da fuck are you then, you trout-faced troll?
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:50:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:48:22 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
You look english.
-------------------------
You mean fat and ugly :(
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:49:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:44:47 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
You look pretty. You look very English, but pretty nonetheless.
--------------------------
Oh! I'm not English!!!!
:/
FJ, Buckys, your last resort.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:48:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You look english.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You look pretty. You look very English, but pretty nonetheless.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:42:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No, he has lipstick on his teeth. But there is a rather busty ladyboy dancing around. If she's pre-op there might be some fun to be had.
I could also keep sedatives in my glorious satchel. If I don't get to sleep soon I'm going to scratch my eyes out.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:37:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I fear for your innocence, FJ.
If only you had a brown leather satchel, with two pockets, one for your rape alarm, one for your mace spray.
Unless you like the Ronnie Corbett guy...
I thought you were more a Phil Mitchell type.
Submitted by PayMeLater (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:35:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:33:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Try telling that to the diminutive ronnie corbett look-a-like who keep reapplying his lippy.
*sips cosmopolitan*
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:23:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
they don't have gays in Glasgow.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:18:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha... Weegie gay bar, good luck with that.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:17:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The gaybar across the street has wi-fi. Like I needed an excuse.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:14:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-30 00:10:58 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Be still, my beating heart.
-------------------------------
i like to think you broke into a neighbouring flat, some young yuppee professional who can afford internet, and more than 12 TV channels, and has real leather sofas and cream shagpiles, to make that comment.
:)
And thanks shadow.
I am working on a post - pictures of my garden and confectionery. You can't eat or smell it, but will be a thousand times prettier than this.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:10:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Be still, my beating heart.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-07-29 19:05:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If I tell you you're pretty, will you send me confections?
Because you're totally pretty. Totally.
I've always secretly wanted a glass eye for entertainment purposes, but I do prefer depth perception to parlor tricks, so there we go.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:42:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha, hitwhores united!
Where's experima? Hitwhore elite.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:40:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A hitwhore of the worse kind, Banj. A bad one.
scourgey, should you see this I will be emailing new directory pic in morning.
Despite the fact I am currently a not so flattering hue of orange.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:33:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:12:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oathy, I'm above Shlongy in many ways. I'm 6'4".
--------------------------------------------
"I didn't know they stacked shit that high." Gunnery Sergeant Hartman
=============
All the more for you to eat, fagboy.
Submitted by SilentRenegade (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:25:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+1 because you went with green
+1 because id probably do you
....end transmission.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:24:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And you forgot, you're a shameless hitwhore!
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:22:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am annoying, bitchy, and desperate.
I crave attention the same way Method craves cock.
Oh forgive me Uber, I have sinned.
At least I managed to give up the blue eyeshadow. It is now green.
That is all.
---------------
Admirable character traits every one.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:17:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yes, boss. ;)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, I think I can sum it all up with...You may not be pretty...but you sure are pretty fucking annoying.
OK...close this post up for good.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-07-29 23:09:59 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
This cracked me up
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 14:50:06 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ESPECIALLY not your brown eye!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 14:49:13 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
for gods sake, el, don't camwhore your one eye!
------------------------
cracked!! what a pun!
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wanna be frahnz =3
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:12:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oathy, I'm above Shlongy in many ways. I'm 6'4".
--------------------------------------------
"I didn't know they stacked shit that high." Gunnery Sergeant Hartman
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This cracked me up
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 14:50:06 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ESPECIALLY not your brown eye!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 14:49:13 PDT (#)
Ranking: 0
for gods sake, el, don't camwhore your one eye!
:)
Submitted by Darth_Famine (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:07:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Then where is the hardcore nudity?
oh wait
Classy, sorry forgot :P
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:01:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It means: "It does not follow."
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 18:01:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
S'ok. I have no idea what it means, and neither does dictionary.com.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:59:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She's right. I was in a hurry and I fucked up. Excuse me.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:56:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 14:54:15 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ugh, Bubba, I was aiming for *classy* with this post.
:)
=================
Class on Ubersite is a nonsequiter.
----------
non sequitur, Bubba.
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:55:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was just wondering. Because if that girl was actually you then it would be much easier to masturbate with your picture rather than trying to remember. But since it is not the case call me for a free pearl necklace.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:54:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ugh, Bubba, I was aiming for *classy* with this post.
:)
=================
Class on Ubersite is a nonsequiter.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ugh, Bubba, I was aiming for *classy* with this post.
:)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2008-07-29 22:50:25 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dumb bitch: Answer the question.
----------------------------------
Is that how you addressed Charlotte?
I was in England, sorry. But I am sweaty...
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:50:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dumb bitch: Answer the question.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:50:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ESPECIALLY not your brown eye!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
for gods sake, el, don't camwhore your one eye!
:)
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah we want one eyed orphelia!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:45:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
My boyfriend has a friend with a glass eye. He'll occasionally take it out in a supermarket or something and suck on it, then pop it back into his eye socket. Or he says "I'd better keep an eye on that" and he takes the eye out and puts it on whatever he was talking about. It's all a bit absurd.
Please camwhore with the eye out- it'll be ever so entertaining.
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:45:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Where you in Charlotte, NC this past weekend wearing a silver blouse at the Whisky River dancing with a dangerously handsome man? Because if you were, you were really sweaty.
And you felt my penis. On your leg.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oathy, I'm above Shlongy in many ways. I'm 6'4".
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:39:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
El, this was taken a couple of months back before this heatwave.
Good thing really, I've had a run in with the Oiz Buin factory and I didn't win.
I have ginger skin.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bubba that was *almost* funny.
You're getting there. I'd say you're definitely above Shlongy though in terms of humor so you at least have that going for you.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:34:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, those scarfs are all the rage in England, but, of course, I had mine for years.
And it hides perfectly my six million chins.
Funny, I always put loads of weight on in my face when I am pregnant.
And everywhere else, really.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:33:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:32:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
============
She sneezed and it fell off.
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:33:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I will make art from you
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:32:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Where is your neck, my dear?
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:31:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oathy, The Greek, and Shlong are so funny. I wish I was that funny.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What's with the scarf? It's summer!!
You girls and your fashion.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:27:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Glass, real..your eyes are pretty.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:26:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlongy if your comments weren't uncommonly boring today I might reply with some effort but they are, and so I won't.
Besides, isn't your fat tramp of a wife in need of her weekly foot exfoliation?
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Green eyeshadow can be just as bad as blue, depending, but you're very pretty regardless.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:19:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2008-07-29 22:14:24 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought you were an attention whore...now you have a pimp.
:)
congrats!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------
If there were a ranking of attention whores on Uber, I don't think I'd make the top 10.
I've seen worse.
Cravng attention isn't so bad anyway, could be worse. I could make nasty hate posts.
:)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:19:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
STFU oathmeal.
And get the fuck out of Method's ass.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's Method's job to make sure everyone on Ubersite maintains a certain level of entertainment value.
If you slip up, his proprietary auto-detect algorithms will sense your lack of humor and alert him immediately, whether he's in the kitchen making a delicious gyro or on a conference call with his grandparents in Mykenos.
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:14:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought you were an attention whore...now you have a pimp.
:)
congrats!!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:14:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Huh?? But I *do* have a glass eye. For a girl with a glass eye and issue with food, I think I am rather hot?
Better, Method?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:13:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, Fey, it is the left. my bug eyes are so big, they didn't make glass ones in my size, so I had to have a smaller one. It pops out when I sneeze.
---
This demands evidence.
Also, you need to send an old eye to me so I can add it to my collection of Uber Parts if/when Tiger would FedEx me one of her old damn legs.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:13:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Move along there, ya... big buttheads!"
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:11:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So my logic was right but wrong, see I noticed the difference in size and reasoned that your right eye was the glass one, cos it stretched your eyelid and your left drooped in a slightly more natural fashion. I'm not actually being intentionally insulting here.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:11:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jesus, you might want to tone down the self deprecation a bit, we get it and all, but you're going WAAAY fucking overboard with it
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, Fey, it is the left. my bug eyes are so big, they didn't make glass ones in my size, so I had to have a smaller one. It pops out when I sneeze.
Submitted by triangle_man (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:08:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
mmmmm trout
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd win the contest, surely?
I have a stammer and a hunch back, oh and a mole on the side of my face which has a better hairline than my scalp.
And five, creamy white teeth.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:08:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And your right eye is the glass one. Did I win?
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:06:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're actually kind of cute, here. I still can't stand you, though.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:05:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you remind me of dina lohan in this photo.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:05:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You really do remind me of this = (
http://images.jupiterimages.com/common/detail/53/78/23367853.jpg
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:03:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No, I am a great believer in c sections, as my scar shows.
But thanks for your size concern.
Does weight cause one to be a slag?
I rather like being pudgy in certain places. I welcome more middle aged spread.
Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You say healthy, I say slag. And no thanks on the full body shots, although if you took one of your cunt the picture would probably just be black.
I bet fucking you is like throwing a pencil down a hallway.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 17:00:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's a lie. I emailed you and I got a tutorial on how to photoshop.
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You go girl.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am not fat, I am a healthy weight. Oh, but I guess I am rather fat at the moment.
Email me and I'll send you full body shots.
For your hateful pleasure.
Submitted by Occams_Razor (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:57:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You forgot fat you pig.
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:55:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't give a shit what anyone says.
I would totally let Orphelia toss my....I mean, help put on my baby sock.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:54:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Green is much classier than blue. Blue looks like diseased or otherwise unhealthy. Green just looks artistic, or like you accidentally fell face first into a puddle of anti-freeze.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:52:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It was taken on a mobile. A shitty mobile. My mother in law left my camera in Bangkok.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:51:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
how do you feel about double penetration?
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:49:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
you are slightly out of focus...
is that natural or due to camera?
+2 for the pic
-1 for not liking pets in bed
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:49:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You can read, assface?
Submitted by GangsterSquid (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:49:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:47:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Show me your glass hole!
________________________
This is probably the least funny review I've ever read on Ubersite.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:48:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Orgasmatron below
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:47:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:45:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Man I need to make a new "uber beauty competition" post, there's a whole barrel full of fresh piggish talent around here
---
Bingo!
http://kingdomofstyle.typepad.co.uk/photos/uncategorized/anthnewstuff11aa.jpg
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:47:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Show me your glass hole!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd win the contest, surely?
I have a stammer and a hunch back, oh and a mole on the side of my face which has a better hairline than my scalp.
And five, creamy white teeth.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:46:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:43:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oooooh, 10 +2's to guess which eye is made of glass!
---
Will you camwhore with the eye removed if someone's right?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:45:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Man I need to make a new "uber beauty competition" post, there's a whole barrel full of fresh piggish talent around here
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:43:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oooooh, 10 +2's to guess which eye is made of glass!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:43:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well you're British, I'll kindly thank you not to EVER open your mouth
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
She obviously has issues.
I get compared to orcs - why do you think I never smile with my mouth open??
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:41:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I know, girls are very sensitive about that! I once told a girl that she and Christina Ricci had similiar features, and she ran away crying. I have a lot to learn about girls!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:40:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You picking on my forehead, Method? Don't start with the forehead, it's gonna push me over the edge.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:39:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, I'd be defending your honor if you had ever remembered to email me that snatch shot you promised me.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:38:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Listen you googly eyed bitch, just because you and Jude Law have the same receding hairline doesn't mean you can go and spread rumors about me, I have feelings too you know = (
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:38:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't figure out if that picture is "arty" or just taken with a really bad camera. Leaning toward the really bad camera, though.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:37:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I LOVE COCK
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-07-29 16:37:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
it's going to be a long night is't it pheely?