HATEMADNESS: OathMeal (587 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.22 on 24 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by OathMeal (View user info) at 2008-09-08 10:43:17 EDT
FINALLY I get the chance to lay into this worthless, mommy-issue-riddled juicer like I've been meaning to since I even FOUND this godforsaken website.
I learned of 'UnderOathMeal' after searching the internet for 'loser ginger retard'. I needed fodder for an argument I was having with a friend about the inherent lack of human value with those born with red hair; apparently South Park didn't do a good enough job of stating the FACTS.
Speaking of FACTS, let's review a few about our good friend OathMeal:
Ginger Brute Fact #1: OathMeal's rise to Uber-infamy began when the idea to post his penis in a sock hit him like a 60 lb. dumbbell to the nads. Who knows where such intelligent revelation comes from?
Moronic Steroid Walking Carrot Fact #2: Since displaying his firecrotch for all the world to see, OathMeal has only deepened the hole he has dug, by fighting like a slighted schoolboy with the likes of Shlongy, Mudwhistle, Scourge and a handful of other lesser-known Ubersite users. It seems his main goal is to craft the most witless, unfunny comments EVER to be conceived around here.
Even Bubba falls to second place when compared to the acute lack of intelligence embodied in OathMeal commentary.
Overgrown Mindless Freckles-n'-Socks Fact #3: Truth be told, OathMeal doesn't actually hold down a job like the rest of us. He actually feeds off the hate and innumerable aspersions directed his way on this and other sites like it. As opposed to regular human beings who require food, shelter and clothing to stay alive, OathMeal is unique in that all he needs for sustenance is a harsh, mother-related comment from Method or some other pointed, personal attack.
Obviously his deep-seated need for attention trumps his body's need for nourishment. We see quite a bizarre human anomaly with 'Bret' here.
I could go on and on about this mindless, mouth-breathing reprobate but really, what hasn't already been said?
He's fat
He's ginger
He can't write
He's not funny
He's friends with Sicosemen
He has dozens of alters
He has a micropenis
He wants to be like Shlongy in every way
AND...
(and this is the part that irritates me the most)
He's not going anywhere.
God help us.
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-09-13 18:37:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
NO MENTION OF SWANSON DINNERS FOR ONE????
Submitted by Garrik (user info) at 2008-09-08 17:18:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Beano below.
Submitted by aquagirl (user info) at 2008-09-08 17:01:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome post big guy.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-09-08 16:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
well done
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-09-08 16:01:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post.
No one misses a chance to take a shot at me. I earn every penny The Man pays me.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-09-08 15:44:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahahahaha
You should have done a hate post on me, as you are clearly obsessed. Well done!
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2008-09-08 13:53:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Accuracy as a vehicle of hate: Not new, but considering the source, not bad either.
Submitted by Replen (user info) at 2008-09-08 13:48:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Judgement (user info) at 2008-09-08 13:41:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-09-08 13:36:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
They say the greatest love of all is the love of one's self. Of course, they say that just before masturbating.
Q: So what follows a self-loathing post, even one as plainly in jest as this one?
A: The Lovesock is gonna get raped.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-09-08 13:23:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fish
Barrel
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2008-09-08 12:33:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You drive too many alters.
It will turn you to the dark side.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-09-08 12:09:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck. Off.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:59:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:41:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i have nightmares about carrot top...
and what's with the eyeliner?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:27:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
nurrr :P
Submitted by Garrik (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:24:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
MY BABY SISTER GIVES BETTER HEAD THAN THIS
___________________
Yea, no shit.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
MY BABY SISTER GIVES BETTER HATE THAN THIS YOU ROBO-PUSSY
Submitted by dohnuts (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Valid points.
Submitted by Wuzi (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:07:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I puked a little at the picture.
No one should have to see that.
No one.
Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2008-09-08 11:00:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah. Maybe I do have the right ... What's that stuff?
-- Homer Simpson
Deep Space Homer
Submitted by Harmon (user info) at 2008-09-08 10:53:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You're not very good at the self deprecation schtick. You try too hard.
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-09-08 10:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-09-08 10:45:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He's right you know.