Uber: A 'Best Of' List (1391 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.3 on 52 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kaos-king (antius777) (View user info) at 2008-09-28 10:41:10 EDT
RE: http://www.ubersite.com/m/119019
We've had a good few days here on Uber. Between "10 Tiny True Stories" and GrueberFest '08, there has been some great quality on the front page. A lot of new users have finally posted and a number of older ones have come back out of the woodwork. There have been a ton of incredible posts over the last few years, some even from a few who might surprise you.
The following is a small list of posts by users here that I believe deserve a 2nd look. Everything is represented bellow, from gross-out humor to gripping horror, from honest looks at life to bizarre poetry. These are just a few of the posts that have made me come back to this site, regardless of how much we all sometimes suck...
AXOLOTL - "The Piggy Bank"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96365
A glimpse at a family's rise and fall during the 1930's American Depression.
DROGOROCH - "Too Late For Regrets"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/100550
A tragic tale of love and destiny
TTOM - "Evolution Or Creation: The Great Debate"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/99044
A comic masterpiece when Darwin squares off against Jesus.
GHOLA - "Anthem Of Grace And Brutality"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/89359
The innocence of youth brought short with a chilling conclusion
ORGASMATRON - "Colostomy Bag Carla"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95624
A poem about a chick... with a colostomy bag.
JACK MCCALLUM - "California Hollow"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/91950
One of the most twisted and disgusting works of fiction I've ever read.
BIG MIKE - "I Want To Play With You"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/61648
A look at how death truly can affect us, in the most personal ways.
THE CYST MASTER - "Super Best Friends (NSFW)"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84291
Securing his place in Hell with this post, it also features Electro!!!
STAGGER LEE - "Bleeding Red Ecstasy"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93503
This UM entry took 'gross' to a wonderful new level.
MOCKIDOL - "Throwing Copper"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67852
A rough tale about romance gone wrong.
INION DE TRUA - "Something"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92087
A creepy lil' tale about an unwanted house guest.
BAMF - "An Ordinary Life"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/89062
Perhaps the most delicate, yet accurate look at family life here on Uber
MERLINA - "If I Had To Live My Life Again..."
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86028
Look back, take stock in one's existence and reflect.
SUSIE DERKINS - "Painting The Roses Red"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/85417
For those who specialize in it, death may not be the end.
DAVROS - "Desperation"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86284
If you had something a little special, what would you do with it?
STEVIE SAYS - "Advice From My Chinese Mom"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/91218
A hysterical list of how to be better liked by those around you.
JOEY G - "White Men CAN Jump"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92806
An amusing tale about why youth is wasted on the young.
FORENSIC GIRL - "I'm Insensitive Because I Threatened A Muppet"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87115
Another look at how HR is slowing killing us with 'political correctness.'
BRDN NKD - "With These Hands"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/77239
An epic tale about the world's greatest lover... and an Emu.
SACRILICIOUS - "Misery Is A Butterfly"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/98397
Love can last a lifetime, but still never be correct.
SCOURGE - "Winter Road"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/81090
A take on all the beauty and tragedy that life has to offer.
COLESLAW MURPHY - "A Childhood Filled With Smoke & Mirrors"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/92180
A look back on youth with some terrifying ramifications.
ST JIMMY - "Why You Should Keep Produce Away From Your Children"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96749
An adolescent rite of passage gone terribly wrong.
CRYSTLE - "Wilted"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/94828
To make this list, a wonderful fairy tale for UM.
THE BOSH MAN - "Earl Scruggs Gets Kicked In The Sack"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/80270
An early adventure, but really... just a typical day for him.
LUNGFISH - "Fucking Sugar: Conversations w/ my Daughter, pt2"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116745
Another day of being 'Daddy' for the old man.
SHADOW - "The Things We Learn"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/117086
Even families can keep secrets, but truth leads to understanding.
SNARK - "Ripple"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/99285
A perspective upon the elderly and the innocent.
Do you think this list is sorely lacking one or two great posts? Is there something you've read here on Uber at some point that you think needs another chance? Linkwhore Away!!! What post has moved you, made you laugh uncontrollably, forced you to think, swept you away, ect.? Is there a particular user you think is woefully under-rated? (Don't say 'yourself.') Throw up links to the Best of the Best.
And thanks again to those I've listed above. You guys rule my fucking face off...
Oh, and Shlongy... there was no way I could simply pick ONE out of your many masterpieces. Sorry...
User Reviews
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2008-09-30 00:35:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad I made an impact. The next impact I will be making will be on the sidewalk when I throw myself off the fucking balcony.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-09-30 00:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh and thanks for good links/bump blah blah blah
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-09-30 00:06:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-09-29 23:49:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, I could go into a whole rant about how the MVA listing is screwed up; the current system only benefits those who have been users since the early days. Newer users, almost regardless of the quality they produce, can never hope to get on it.
_____
Tell that to Adam
---
or orgasmo or ftw. those guys are 20K-ish users.
who thinks/cares about this shit anyway?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2008-09-29 23:49:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually, I could go into a whole rant about how the MVA listing is screwed up; the current system only benefits those who have been users since the early days. Newer users, almost regardless of the quality they produce, can never hope to get on it.
_____
Tell that to Adam
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-29 20:57:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-09-29 11:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-29 09:26:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Toe - - Someone pointed out the other day what a right miserable cunt you've been recently. I begin to agree with such statements.
---
I made a opinion about your post ---- hence i'm a cunt. Will a +2 make it all alright?
___________________
It just seems like you're always in kind of a pissy mood and talkin' shit on everybody for no apparent reason.
I dunno, I don't really know you at all or anything. Your 1st response just seemed a bit... severe.
Submitted by DTII (user info) at 2008-09-29 19:11:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/u/DeadToast
Just sayin'...
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-09-29 11:29:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
its funny when I see old posts linked that I don't remember.
thanks for the bump.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-09-29 11:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-29 09:26:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Toe - - Someone pointed out the other day what a right miserable cunt you've been recently. I begin to agree with such statements.
---
I made a opinion about your post ---- hence i'm a cunt. Will a +2 make it all alright?
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-09-29 10:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Kaos- Probably one of the best compliments I've gotten here, thanks.
Same goes for you toe.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-09-29 09:27:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you pick THAT post out of the nearly 300 i've put up?
but i AM sammiched between forensic and sac
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-29 09:26:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The Drake - - I purposely stayed away from B@W posts. And you have like, what? 27 of them now???
Toe - - Someone pointed out the other day what a right miserable cunt you've been recently. I begin to agree with such statements.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-09-29 08:22:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-09-29 08:02:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I thought I would have made this list
---
You? hahaha, who do you think you are? some guy that makes funny posts that get on B@W?
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2008-09-29 08:02:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I thought I would have made this list.
I thought wrong.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2008-09-29 07:08:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
>sigh<
Another list I didn't make.
:(
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-09-29 06:43:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This post reminds me of when mates reccomend movies to you.
A few years ago, a girl I used to work with reccomended the movie 'Troy' to me. I went to see it with my boyfriend, we were so uninterested in the movie that we couldn't even be bothered kissing, It's suckiness had sucked the passion out of us. I nearly fell asleep.
In turn I recommended my movie, which was the Dawn of the Dead remake. She went to see it and said that I was a 'pretty sick person' for enjoying that movie.
All in all it makes this post pretty redundant. The people that frequent uber (so i've always felt) don't really seem like the kind who follow and accept what someone else tells them is good.
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2008-09-29 03:29:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to say that all you fags passed up a very good writer: The Yellow-Man aka Symbolic_ aka ORANGE-SAN. Yeah some of his troll posts are just that, but there are more than enough nuggets of gold that he deserves more FUCKING attention than anyone here could ever give him. I'm not trying to suck on his uber-dick but he's got some good shit, imo.
http://www.ubersite.com/u/yellow-man
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2008-09-29 02:06:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Have I been gone too long to qualify for such a list, or is my stuff just not "up to snuff"?
Regardless, I will go through this list and read them all... bookmarked.
Submitted by inion_de_trua (user info) at 2008-09-29 00:16:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i have to +2. god it took too long to find that button.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:57:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm basically going through all of these...
http://www.ubersite.com/u/The_Cyst_Master
... and laughing myself into coughing fits so bad I've almost passed out twice now.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:52:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
But...
... Fat Tony is/was simply the fat, racist, ignorant, semi-illiterate version of, um well... Loki.
The posts aren't really about anything except himself and his dim world view.
I mean, I suppose there's SOME element of humor to them. The same kind as when you watch in horror as the retard in the school's mascot uniform asks the head cheerleader if she'll sit on his face and wiggle. Funny, yes; but ultimately simply cringe-worthy. Besides, didn't we figure out that "Fat Tony" was just another one of Method's evil Alter Army?
Then again, every single user I listed above is probably an Alter of Method's, too.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:24:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sideburns has some absolute GOLD. Fat tony is my hero, and he's funny as fucking shit. Not my hero as though I idol him or want to be him, but my hero as through a 'no holds barr say what the fuck i feel like saying even if it's the N word' idol.
Even though I'm no longer a racist.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2008-09-28 22:58:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Excuse me? Where the fuck is sideburns in all of this? Fat tony? wtf
_________________________________
I'll be honest, I haven't read about 50% of the individuals on the MVA list.
Why?
Well, they haven't posted regularly in years. I'm a 16000 level user. A good number of them were gone by the time I came around. That being said, I know a number of posts I linked here are from users that we haven't seen in some time - but they WERE around when I started. Actually, I could go into a whole rant about how the MVA listing is screwed up; the current system only benefits those who have been users since the early days. Newer users, almost regardless of the quality they produce, can never hope to get on it.
And Fat Tony? Are you serious??? Alter or Real, he can choke on my cock.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2008-09-28 22:58:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Excuse me? Where the fuck is sideburns in all of this? Fat tony? wtf
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-09-28 22:48:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 21:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just hate when someone tries to summarize a story in a single sentence.
___________________________
Uhhh, okay... you're a weird dude, Doodles.
SIDE NOTE: Pink Floyd's "The Division Bell" album was way under-rated.
====================
Doodles? Weird? Say it ain't so!!
He's decided not to respond to my pokes at him. His loss.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-09-28 22:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 21:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
...
SIDE NOTE: Pink Floyd's "The Division Bell" album was way under-rated.
-----
No shit. I'll wager it's on par with DSotM for under-the-influence cosmic-truth-revealingability. Plus, any music with Steven Hawking in it is automatically the Voice of God.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 21:57:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just hate when someone tries to summarize a story in a single sentence.
___________________________
Uhhh, okay... you're a weird dude, Doodles.
SIDE NOTE: Pink Floyd's "The Division Bell" album was way under-rated.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-09-28 19:20:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-09-28 14:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/79683
One of the best things I've EVER read here.
-----
You're too kind.
And KK - good choices.
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2008-09-28 19:02:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw, none of my fantastic posts were chosen. Oh well.
Submitted by Wuzi (user info) at 2008-09-28 18:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I was going to give this a 2 when I scrolled through and noticed Shlongy wasn't on it, but you just had to go and give him a compliment.... tisk tisk
Submitted by DTII (user info) at 2008-09-28 17:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.fredvanlente.com/cthulhutract/pages/index.html
The truth about the Universe.
- Deadtoast
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I just hate when someone tries to summarize a story in a single sentence.
Which you did.
over and over and over again.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:37:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aw, thank you, babe.
I'm not always the best at remembering a post's content by title, but I recognize quite a few of these that I know have been favorites for me, as well.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:35:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:23:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Uh, any particular reason there Doodles, or are we just having a heavy flow day?
.............
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your descriptions of the stories severely pissed me off.
That being said (for the most part) I agree.
===============
Nah, Doodles is just pissed that he can't write half that well.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:48:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh wow! Thank you, thank you!
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:44:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't tease me like that, dear...
... I'll simply fall outta my chair at such thoughts.
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:26:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm sounds fun.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:23:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Uh, any particular reason there Doodles, or are we just having a heavy flow day?
Ruthless, if I could, I would tackle you right now and snog you silly...
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:14:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hi there.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:07:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your descriptions of the stories severely pissed me off.
That being said (for the most part) I agree.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 14:18:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, I didn't proofread that opening bit at all, did I?
Christ, I think I'm still hungover.
Vast quantities of coffee & cigarettes for me today...
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-09-28 14:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/79683
One of the best things I've EVER read here.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-09-28 13:33:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this stinks
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-09-28 13:26:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/110353
and http://www.ubersite.com/m/109474
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's too bad that certain dipshits use a post like this only to go out and rate posters as opposed to posts. . .
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:48:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now I wish I'd edited that piece. I've done you all a (minor) disservice.
Submitted by billrhine (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:42:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by PayMeLater (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:32:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you for this post.
Submitted by Malachewaii (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:07:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jimbo. He is a great writer and every time I read a post about Tom, no matter HOW many times I've read it before, it still brings tears to my eyes. You forgot him.
I'd say you forgot me, but.. I write shit. So I'm actually quite thankful I'm not on the list.
Been here a long time, but.. I still write shit, anytime I DO write.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-09-28 12:01:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kudos for this... so many posts I might have missed otherwise. Got some good reading material here.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-09-28 11:50:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can see how that would be a difficult task.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-09-28 11:21:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll remember this post, and read these maybe next week in my motel room, assuming I get the company lap top and am not drinking at the swimming pool, which is what I've been doing most nights of late.
This is my favorite post of the year: http://www.ubersite.com/m/117399
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-09-28 10:49:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Every now and then I read a post that totally kills me and I always think I should bookmark it but I never do... then when I'm put on the spot I just remember ANYTHING by comic book guy rocks.
He is my favourite all time poster, hands down.