Fireflies in a Jar (535 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.16 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ruthless (View user info) at 2008-09-28 15:07:21 EDT
If I could
I would bring you inside my skin
so you could feel
the sighs and shivers of
that sinuous snake that has
taken up residence
in my belly
so you would know
the tightening and sweetness
the thought of you brings
and the heat of awareness that slides
gently over my limbs
so you could
hold in your hands the uncertainty
and uneasiness
that permeate my days
so you could
set them free
like so many fireflies loosed from a jar
and together we could
watch their blinking lights become
swallowed by the sun
as it rises over the railing of
the verandah where we sit
I with my coffee
You with your tea
while a curly-haired little girl
blows raspberries at our feet.
User Reviews
Submitted by John_H_Kim (user info) at 2008-09-29 16:26:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-09-29 11:54:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-09-29 10:04:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'd feel better if this post was just a camwhore.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-09-29 09:35:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked it until the curly headed child was blowing raspberries.
Submitted by zoobie2000 (user info) at 2008-09-29 08:52:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
meh i don't understand, would have been -2 if not for Paymelater's comment
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2008-09-29 07:14:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool poetry.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-09-29 05:52:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Bah.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-09-28 23:01:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
-2 because I hate poetry.
+2 because I'm pretty sure you have a vag.
Submitted by deathmobile (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:55:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by PayMeLater (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:46:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If I could
I would climb inside your anus
so I could feel
the sighs and shivers of
that tapeworm that has
taken up residence
in your colon
so I would know
the sweet tightening of your sphincter
the thought of this brings fear
that you might have diarrhea
and I realize I should have
chosen another hole
can you feel the uncertainty
and uneasiness
which permeates your small intestine
could you please
hold it in
just a little longer
and together we could
allow a small fart
to relieve the pressure
until I can get the fuck
out of your ass
and back in your vag
where it's wet and warm
oh goddamnit
you have a yeast infection
check your e-mail
there may be info
about antifungal
medications
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-09-28 16:39:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like this a lot. A ruthless post is always a ray of sunshine on the front page.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:43:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
check your email, r
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:41:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is actually good.
Submitted by Zampano (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:36:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by RestrictionsApply (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
check your email, r
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:25:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ruthless, my dear... a rarely-seen post from you has just made my day.
Submitted by metalbeast7 (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:22:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
first time i read a whole piece of poetry on here.
pretty good.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:19:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
beautiful.
you fucking rock ruthless
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2008-09-28 15:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Usually I shitcan all poetry posted here on spec, but this wasn't bad.