Idle Drug Musings & a Pic IV (725 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 0.08 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tokerson (View user info) at 2008-10-15 17:14:51 EDT
Fat pride proves our society is messed up.
The inability to mock fat pride proves society is messed up.
Women love chocolate far more than men... how do they experience it?
God is mocking us with the birds and the bees.
Cells multiply by dividing.
Does a man's nuts grow ever-bigger if he has a vasectomy?
As men will almost always piss on a tree, rock, fence, dumpster or just on the side of something in general when outside without ever considering why, it appears to imply the leftover evolutionary male instinct to mark one's territory.
Of all the places to go and do drugs, the opium den has the best vibe.
In Africa, midgets were considered powerful sorcerers to be feared and respected.
Feminism could be just an excuse for lazy women to overlook basic hygiene principles.
Prague is the new Paris.
Blacks are so often good athletes because slaves were bred like livestock; only the biggest, strongest and dumbest had were bred for many generations, and now Afro Americans are built much bigger than African or European blacks.
It was illegal to execute female virgins in middle ages-Europe because they were holy and sacred, so by law virgins who committed capital offences had to first be raped.
Waterbeds are like Communism; only good in theory
A great speaker is a great liar
The original prime evil of Christianity was first Morgoth, then Baal, and after their culture's religions were destroyed in the name of righteousness, they targeted Lucifer, a minor Canaanite God of Enlightenment, Light, and Wisdom to demonize.
Things that require effort and are beneficial to a person's mind are pleasurable experiences while those beneficial to the body are painful.
Masochists can't appreciate their luck: they're the only people who've fused pleasure and pain.
Everything is a product of the need for it and is always flawed by being a creation of the flaw that precedes and necessitates it; if something exists, it harmonizes and must struggle with its defining anithesis - error is needed for something to exist
Democratic protests are the desire for change but the inability to fulfill it
Not once has a year of Jubilee been recorded
The new Joker is cool because he doesn't have a clean and flamboyant costume
Left-handed product stores would have a %15 customer base of those who were aware of them, which is a relatively insanely large target demographic - Lefties would kill for specialty pens, scissors, notebooks and products and couldn't go back after trying them
Gypsies are the more dignified and productive European hoboes: will steal your money, not ask for it
Sliced bread isn't great
Silence doesn't exist
Sponges are animals and could live forever
Hippies look like Jesus
Hippies act like Jesus but with opposite motivations
Men like saunas, cigars and partial nudity far more than women
The Luftewaffe should be feared
The Commandment forbidding using the Lord's name in vain probably means saying "Jehovah/Yahweh damnit!" instead of "God damnit!", as God is his title, not name. God's name is sacred and impossible to translate, so is pronounced and spelled differently, and saying it incorrectly is to desecrate something Holy
The Bible explains how to curse a woman by sterilizing her, or destroying her reason to live, if she's cheated on her husband
The Bible explains how to use rituals that allow for what's essentially sorcery
God is so glorious to look at his front causes instant death; he's only viewable from behind
Four of the last six Presidents have been left handed, and both possible incumbents are, too. A proportionate ratio would be one in eight southpaw presidents.
The left handed are persecuted and seen as sinister, evil and negative in all cultures; God's right hand man was Gabriel and left hand man was Lucifer, in Africa lefties were thought warlocks, in the middle east and much of Asia the left hand is unclean and used to wipe one's ass, and to use your left hand on doorknobs and the like, touching people or used to eat is very offensive, and in Latin 'left' means 'sinister' and 'ambidextrous' means 'dually right handed'
Living as a lefty is like living as an immigrant: you're in a world geared for other people and find things specifically awkward for you; it's a resignation to mild and constant disadvantage
Pidgeons could be sacrificed in lieu of doves if poor
The religious who believe in Hell are so because of the need to save themselves from pain and not for the belief of the benefits of the values
Knuckle cracking is harmless
The only right you have is to be justified in doing whatever you're capable of
User Reviews
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-10-16 21:00:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is what would result if someone like Dane Cook took a crack at writing jokes like George Carlin
Submitted by Maddog (user info) at 2008-10-16 20:44:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Luftewaffe should be feared
___________________________________________________________________
Bet your ass. Blitzkrieg, motherfucker!
Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-10-16 10:38:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
prague is the new paris;
we have way better looking grrls in prague than paris.
whether they put out more, unknown to me...
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-10-16 06:12:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yea yea yea,
asians love rice. polynesians love taro.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-10-16 06:12:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yea yea yea,
asians love rice. polynesians love taro.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2008-10-16 06:11:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yea yea yea,
asians love rice. polynesians love taro.
Submitted by kitchens_closed (user info) at 2008-10-15 19:26:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Eh...the whole list thing is old. Maybe if you'd have taken a few of the most provocative bullets and formed them into well written paragraphs, I'd give this a higher rating.
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-10-15 19:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah Lefties!
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-10-15 18:59:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Knuckle cracking is harmless
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Try telling my wife that. I love these things, keep it up please.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-10-15 17:58:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2008-10-15 17:21:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll be the second to tell you this post blew...
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-10-15 17:19:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Replen (user info) at 2008-10-15 17:19:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
only read the first line.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-10-15 17:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Let me be the first to tell you this post blew...