I think I would enjoy escaping from a Turkish prison. (522 hits)
Category: Politics -> AfghanistanRating: -1 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Director (View user info) at 2008-11-11 00:27:46 EST
At first it would be fun. Think of it. Beatings on the souls of my feet. Gay sex with British prisoners. A big fat warden with two big fat sons. My girlfriend could come over and I could masturbate to her tits in the visiting booth.
That would be pretty interesting stuff.
I'll bet a guy who look a lot like John Hurt would be in there too, and we'd become great friends.
Eventually I'd get frustrated and try to escape and get caught of course. They beat me so bad I have a hernia and lose a testicle. That of course would only strengthen my Super American Resolve to escape.
I'd eventually accidentally kill the warden and escape in a guard uniform, through Greece. Then I'd write a book about it and Hollywood would hire an actor much more attractive than me to play the role.
And I'd have shitloads of money. And be famous.
Kick ass.
User Reviews
Submitted by Biteme (user info) at 2008-11-21 16:45:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-11-15 09:05:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Uber police above
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-11-15 10:00:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 anti-bubba
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-11-15 10:00:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Your feet have souls?
Damn, I got ripped off, i settled for soles.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-11-15 09:05:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JasonHarris (user info) at 2008-11-15 09:38:20 GMT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
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Dear lord, Beano or Oathmeal, you are a tremendous wanker.
Submitted by JasonHarris (user info) at 2008-11-15 04:38:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Biteme (user info) at 2008-11-12 08:20:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-11-11 10:28:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
God knows that at your present pace, you might certainly have the opportunity someday.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-11-11 10:26:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-11-11 00:45:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"souls of my feet?"
NO.
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Look at the big brain on Bubba.
Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-11-11 10:04:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
ROFLCOPTORS!!!!!!!1
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-11-11 10:00:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2008-11-11 09:57:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2008-11-11 08:54:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wtf is wrong with you people?
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-11-11 08:36:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
But, you're fat and stupid and ugly.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-11-11 05:36:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2008-11-11 04:30:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
turkish men are hot
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-11-11 04:00:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I would enjozzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2008-11-11 03:56:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Move to Turkey and there's an odds on chance you will be found drunk in charge of a camel. Drooling at the mouth and shouting 'lemmmme post a ppphoto of you guys on uber'
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-11-11 02:13:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
if i breathe at the right pace my whistling nostrils sound like crickets.
Submitted by vexx (user info) at 2008-11-11 02:05:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-11-11 01:45:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck off you worthless chunk of aids infested vomit.
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2008-11-11 01:07:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
sucktacular
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-11-11 00:45:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"souls of my feet?"
NO.