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What are the Pet Monkey Laws in YOUR State??? (23088 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 1.47 on 51 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Sally Walker (View user info) at 2008-12-04 16:51:49 EST




5 oclock thursday posts are my finest.JPG (149 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2009-10-19 01:45:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by jcscorpio73 (user info) at 2009-01-10 15:27:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2


Reads like a 13 year old? Bunch of fucking retards writing about fucking monkey laws. What's with the lazy scum comments, what are you guys all high on meth or something? You wouldn't know good writing if an illegal monkey shat it in your face...
---------------

FINALLY SOMEBODY WHO GETS ME!!!!!

Submitted by PlatinumScarecrow (user info) at 2009-08-24 20:48:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by jcscorpio73 (user info) at 2009-01-10 14:27:25 CST (#)
Ranking: -2


Reads like a 13 year old? Bunch of fucking retards writing about fucking monkey laws. What's with the lazy scum comments, what are you guys all high on meth or something? You wouldn't know good writing if an illegal monkey shat it in your face...

---------

I was thinking the same thing with a little less ghey.

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-08-24 17:34:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

SO I CAN'T CARRY A GUN, BUT I CAN CARRY A FUCKING MONKEY?

FUCK YOU, STATE.

PREPARE TO BE SPLATTERED WITH POO.

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2009-02-27 11:23:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Monkeys always get a +2.

Always.

Submitted by bob (user info) at 2009-01-10 16:31:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2


Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-12-09 12:54:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-12-05 06:54:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:15:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

When monkeys are outlawed, only outlaws will have monkeys.

Submitted by jcscorpio73 (user info) at 2009-01-10 15:27:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2


Reads like a 13 year old? Bunch of fucking retards writing about fucking monkey laws. What's with the lazy scum comments, what are you guys all high on meth or something? You wouldn't know good writing if an illegal monkey shat it in your face...

Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2009-01-10 05:55:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-12-26 01:52:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Where the hell was I during this monkeyness? I celebrate the monkey, and the entire Monkees catalog.

Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2008-12-16 10:10:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Iowa's working on a ban???

Time to write my state congressman.

Or buy a monkey and get grandfathered in.

Submitted by bugblender (user info) at 2008-12-14 23:23:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Ummm...not one racist comment about louisiana.

Wow,

Being a Banana Republic and all...I'm a little disappointed but pleasantly suprised.

Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2008-12-10 12:55:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

surprisingly awesome.

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-10 01:52:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm not allowed a pet monkey in the state i live or the state i grew up in.

:(

Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2008-12-09 12:54:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-12-05 06:54:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:15:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

When monkeys are outlawed, only outlaws will have monkeys.

Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2008-12-09 12:12:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

B@W

Submitted by therealgeddylee (user info) at 2008-12-06 18:42:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Enlightening. Truly enlightening.

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-05 14:44:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

ha

Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2008-12-05 11:55:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by BigBuffty (user info) at 2008-12-05 10:01:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

needs more rape

Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-05 08:56:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:57:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

You don't deserve a full +2 anyway, since I'm in one of the states currently in the process of monkey permabanning.
---
well if you get a monkey soon you can probably be grandfathered or something.

Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2008-12-05 07:31:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2008-12-05 06:54:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:15:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

When monkeys are outlawed, only outlaws will have monkeys.

Submitted by czwij (user info) at 2008-12-05 05:38:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

monkey see
monkey do
monkey will destroy you

bad monkey!


it's better that you dont have one

Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-12-05 01:55:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2008-12-04 21:47:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

"I ... married my wife because she promised me a monkey." - icarus1987, 14 November 2008

Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2008-12-04 20:54:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

No Comment

Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2008-12-04 19:51:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

This is fucking awesome.

Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2008-12-04 19:23:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Look, I live in freezone monkey state. I'd need some cold weather boyz though. It's nippy.

Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-12-04 18:29:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I am outraged that the state of Jawjuh in which I currently reside has a ban upon my kith and kin....back noth tawards Vujinyah I shall head, to the land of my forefathers, who so wisely decreed that every man should be free to own a monkey.


VA legal code 569, section R: primates for domestic companionship, paragraph 14.

Submitted by TooMuchMan (user info) at 2008-12-04 18:01:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

That orangutan is probably all like "what the fuck am I doing here with all these lower primates, jackass?"

Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:50:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Vould you like to touch my monkey?

I vould be as happy as a little GIIIHHHRRRLL.

Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:38:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:58:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

According to this, I could have a pet monkey if I wanted.

Nah. I'll pass. Monkeys sling poo.
==============
So does Method, but so what?


Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:19:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:13:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Sweet! VA allows pet monkeys! :)
============
Aces.

Submitted by lotuseater (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:18:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Slavery is still legal in Hawaii!

Ok, so I looked at this map and noticed that Hawaii is the only state requiring monkey owners to be bonded. I've been writing a bunch of crap about municipal bonding lately and still don't fully understand it, so I did a little bit of research on Hawaii's monkey policies. The site I ended up at said something along the lines of "Hawaii is the only state requiring a bond to possess nonhuman primates."

The logical conclusion, then, would be that there are no limitations on possessing human primates, right?

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:18:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm more worried about the "monkey-spank" laws in my neighborhood.

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:15:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

When monkeys are outlawed, only outlaws will have monkeys.

Submitted by sage104 (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:13:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Sweet! VA allows pet monkeys! :)

Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:08:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

B@W

Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:05:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2


YOU WANT TO PET MY MONKEY?


Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:04:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

i wonder what the laws are regarding the ownership of porch monkeys? my state says it's legal but in the past, putting them to work has been problematic.

Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:02:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I have to buy a permit to have a wolf hybrid in VA, but I can own a howler monkey? Son of a bitch.
God bless the Commiewealth.

Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2008-12-04 17:02:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

this is good info

Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:59:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-12-04 13:57:20 PST (#)
Ranking: 2

i dont get the ban in california. i have heard that one out of every three teenage male monkeys in compton is in prison. are my facts and figures wrong or am i missing something else?
=====

I have no idea why this happened and it was and will probably only be funny to me, but after reading this I imagined a monotone black gentlemen stating, "If it wasn't for my monkey, I'd be dead or in jail."


Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:58:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

According to this, I could have a pet monkey if I wanted.

Nah. I'll pass. Monkeys sling poo.

Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:57:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

You don't deserve a full +2 anyway, since I'm in one of the states currently in the process of monkey permabanning.


Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:57:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

i dont get the ban in california. i have heard that one out of every three teenage male monkeys in compton is in prison. are my facts and figures wrong or am i missing something else?

Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:56:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Yeah.


Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:56:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Huh, I did not know that I could just go out and buy a monkey if I felt like it.

+2 that is almost good to know


Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:55:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

hahahahahahaahhaha

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:55:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

In Canada same sex monkey marriage is not only legal but encouraged... hence Celine Dion.

Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:53:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Very useful for me.

thanks

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-04 16:52:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Ahahahahaha!


Homer: There couldn't be heaven if there weren't a hell.

Bart: Who's in there?

Homer: Oh, uh ... Hitler's dog. And that dog Nixon had, whassisname, um,
Chester ...

Lisa: Checkers.

Homer: Yeah! One of the Lassies is in there, too. The mean one -- the
one that mauled Jimmy.

Dog of Death