THUPA: Apparently, You Are What You Consume (602 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: thupa
Rating: 1.75 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by beeltea (View user info) at 2008-12-28 21:43:58 EST
"My life is all about music!" She said,
When I inquired as to what makes her tick;
"It fills me with joy, it fills me with hope...
It's my world, and how I get my kicks."
"So you're a singer?" Said I.
"Can't hold a tune!" She replied.
"Well you must play on strings..."
"I've no skill for those things."
"Do you write or produce?
Or critique those who do?"
"No, I just enjoy listening quite a bit."
......That's it?
"I am quite the connoisseur of cuisine!" said he.
"Food is my passion; and without I'd be lost!
I always demand the finest ingredients,
And please, don't bother me with the cost."
"You must be quite the cook."
"Well, I can follow a book."
"Can you bake? Can you roast?"
"I can barely make toast."
"Do you grow veggies or fruit?"
"My small flat doesn't suit.
You see, I just really, really like to eat."
......I see.
"There's no bigger sports person than I!" he exclaimed.
"I know all the stats, all the players, and the line!
I'm all about football, and hockey, and tennis;
I love all athletics; and I watch all the time."
"Do you play any of these?"
"Oh, I haven't the knees."
"So you coach and you train?"
"Nah, too much of a pain!"
"Then you must referee..."
"There's no uniform on me!
I just root and I cheer for my teams."
...Well it seems,
THAT YOU PEOPLE NEED TO GO LEARN SOME FUCKING SKILLS.
SHEESH.
User Reviews
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-12-30 15:23:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
goddammit now I'm drunk :(
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-12-30 14:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is Sacrilicious up for it?
You know what I mean.
I'm not writing a poem if I aint got an opponent!
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-12-30 11:25:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YAYYYY you win.
Submitted by TheGoat (user info) at 2008-12-30 08:49:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-29 20:16:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
11:59 ET
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2008-12-29 14:23:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-29 06:57:56 GMT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey JoeyG, if you still want to write a poem for THUPA, I could put you up against Sacrilicious for the open spot in the bracket of round three. That is if you and Saccy are interested. The deadline would be tomorrow, and ratings would end on the 30th like all other round two entries. Let me know if you're interested.
-----------------
What time tomorrow? It's 19:20 here right now, I gotsta go to work tomorrow but will be home by 17:00 GMT. Like the sad, lonely alcoholic that I am, I will have ample time to knock together some tripe that may pass as poetry in a care home.
I'm up for it, jus' gimme some details. Or, just give me a poem that I can post and pass off as my own. Either way is cool.
Peace.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2008-12-29 12:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What Scourge said.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-12-29 11:07:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a friend who is 6'6' 350+ and is black as licorice. We had a debate one day about politics and in the heat of the debate I called him a neo nazi.
His head twitched to one side as he digested the insult and finally looked at me and said, "did you just call me a negro nazi?"
Submitted by ColchesterDr (user info) at 2008-12-29 03:17:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-29 00:14:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well i disagree about being a second late:
"Here are your round two brackets; as said before, You have until next Sunday to write your poems. Happy Holidays!"
seems like it's still Sunday to me by the date stamp on my post.
and it's NOT the second time i won by forfeit. i posted the first time and it was a fucking fine post, if i do say so myself. look at the rating on it. does uber EVER reward garbage? i think we both know the answer to that one.
and i posted this time as well. a post i put a lot of thought into. WTF? if my inspirations and intentions aren't evident and my work cannot be appreciated, maybe you should go to the doctor and ask him what he can do ABOUT A DEAD FUCKING SOUL!!!!!!!!
*deep breaths*
*counts to ten*
it's not my fault you can't appreciate things that aren't part of your pre-set definitions and ideas of how 'things should be'... shame really. i thought you were an open minded guy, being a theatre queer and all, but it seems that maybe if me and billy were riding our choppers down a road in the deep south you'd shoot billy off his chopper from the window of your pickup and when i turned around to mourn my friend you'd come back and blow me and my sweet chopper up as well.
i'm beginning to think you have it in for me. what have i ever done to you besides lavish you with praise and kindness?
hmmm???
I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-29 00:01:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is perhaps the deepest piece you've written. There's just not a lot of hand holding, is all.
Every word should be approached as if it was a twenty ton weight. Heavy, man. Heavy.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2008-12-28 23:58:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you're in it scourge. deadline is in 1 minute.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-12-28 23:42:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuckin' A.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-12-28 23:11:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-12-28 22:57:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2008-12-28 22:42:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i rapped this in my head. this would be an awesome rap song.
specifically to the tune of "Paradise Lost" by Hollywood Undead, as its stuck in my head and that was the tune i used.
Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2008-12-28 22:31:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stand up and Testify!!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:53:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
take that, motherfucker.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:52:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I DON'T EVEN LIKE BLTs.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:52:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
guess what?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:52:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
fuck you too, then.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:51:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
you're really pissing me off
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:51:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
c'mon, i don't have all night.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:50:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
answer my question, asshole.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-12-28 21:47:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh yeah...am i still in this contest and what is the next deadline?
also, something about boobs.