10 Things (781 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.73 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SunnyG (View user info) at 2009-05-09 00:34:32 EDT
I haven't posted in....a while. I was bored and stopped by, so Hello! Is Shlongy still alive? I miss his Napoleon complex. Is Caul still French? It'd be a shame if he assimilated.
Anyway, here are 10 random things that have happened to me/banter that I figured would keep you entertained hopefully. If not...well...go fuck yourself. And hey, maybe we can start a bandwagon! Or...don't. Because those are fucking annoying.
1. To prank my roommate my friend and I hid in his closet with a digital camera while he hooked up with a 200 pound forward from the girls rugby team. To add insult to injury, these photos were emailed.
2. The same roommate reversed my lock...so it now locks from the outside. I found this out when I woke up to go to class and couldn't get out of my room. Fuck my life.
3. For the summer months before school starts up I'm doing research in a Bioengineering lab. My research advisor was straight up educated in Soviet Russia. I made the joke of, "In Soviet Russia, DNA analyze YOU!". He was not impressed.
4. I am no longer allowed to attend varsity Basketball games. Apparently referees don't have a sense of humour. Also the words "Drunk in Public" and "Assault" were thrown around. Fuck them.
5. My mom told me that she'd rather have me be gay than bring home another white girl.
6. My delusional grandmother wants to arrange my marriage.
7. Instead of dancing with my date, I abandoned her on the dance floor of a formal event to 'party boy' with a bunch of dudes. When she got pissed off, my only response was: "Listen....we were just a bunch of guys who wanted to dance!". I never heard back from her.
8. No matter how much your landlord looks like Kid Rock, don't call him Kid Rock. "Rock" or "Yo Kid, fix my window!" also aren't acceptable salutations. Especially when you don't pay your rent on time just to piss him off, and furthermore frame his eviction notices and display them in the foyer. Oh the joys of student housing!
9. NFL Network's Jamie Dukes is a fucking idiot. I'm convinced he's only on the show to make controversial idiotic comments.
10. I am sick and tired of every cracker asking me if I've seen Slumdog Millionaire.
User Reviews
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-05-11 11:53:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you should totally take home a white dude, buttfuck him in front of your mom, and then ask the racist old cunt what her problem is.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2009-05-11 08:42:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Anoop!
Damn shame the way they voted you off American Idol. You totaly could have won.
Submitted by moopy4u (user info) at 2009-05-10 22:41:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lol, good shit, that was funny....
But really, HAVE you seen Slumdog Millionaire!?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-05-10 17:48:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Y HELO THAR SANJAYA
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-05-10 16:54:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-05-09 13:26:19 WST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-05-09 00:43:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what was slumdog like? i just figured it was typical hollywood hype "oh look some foreigners made a movie! how cute! they think theyre people! lets give them an award so we feel good about ourselves"
_____
Rubbish. It was an English treatment, so about as "Indian" as a 3am takeaway in Manchester. THe characters were Rushdie-esque in their broadness and lack of complexity: The beautiful girl (who has no other redeeming features), the lovestruck hero, and various "baddies".
It really was just glossy, glossy trash. Think about it, it was made for US consumption, so just how authentic could it be. A poor excuse for the academy to go "OMG how foreign!" and do another line of blow.
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Midnights Children is one of my favourite books, so characters lacking complexity don't bother me. I just hated how the brother had to "redeem" himself at the end. What pissed me off though is the complete lack of singing and dancing in it. Every bollywood film has a musical number, with colour and singing and dancing, just tacking it on at the end is not good enough.
It was still better than some shit out there though.
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2009-05-10 08:24:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
DOOOD KOLEGE WUZ AWSUME< RITE?
Submitted by Spuzzum (user info) at 2009-05-10 02:57:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-05-09 17:57:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
okayish list.
So cold in russia, you haf not idiea.
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2009-05-09 09:49:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
So why haven't you posted the pics yet? Maybe some of us have a thing for 200 lb. rugby players.
Submitted by sandmantate (user info) at 2009-05-09 09:46:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I haven't seen Slumdog, either. It just didn't seem like a movie I would be interested in.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-05-09 08:16:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
10. I am sick and tired of every cracker asking me if I've seen Slumdog Millionaire.
=======================
So have you? I haven't, but I've heard good things.
Submitted by bozznc (user info) at 2009-05-09 06:44:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 just because Tunak Tunak Tun came on my Ipod while reading this. Also, I miss the hottie I dated in Tuscon who made bangin lamb curry. Slightly hairy forearms notwithstanding, she was fucking hot!
Submitted by Replen (user info) at 2009-05-09 05:46:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by melkorthedelerious (user info) at 2009-05-09 03:53:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1. To prank my roommate my friend and I hid in his closet with a digital camera while he hooked up with a 200 pound forward from the girls rugby team. To add insult to injury, these photos were emailed.
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Sounds like he pranked himself, you just supplied evidence.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2009-05-09 02:28:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
have you ever seen Silver Streak?
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-05-09 01:35:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
5. My mom told me that she'd rather have me be gay than bring home another white girl.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ahhahahah!
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-05-09 01:26:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-05-09 00:43:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what was slumdog like? i just figured it was typical hollywood hype "oh look some foreigners made a movie! how cute! they think theyre people! lets give them an award so we feel good about ourselves"
_____
Rubbish. It was an English treatment, so about as "Indian" as a 3am takeaway in Manchester. THe characters were Rushdie-esque in their broadness and lack of complexity: The beautiful girl (who has no other redeeming features), the lovestruck hero, and various "baddies".
It really was just glossy, glossy trash. Think about it, it was made for US consumption, so just how authentic could it be. A poor excuse for the academy to go "OMG how foreign!" and do another line of blow.
Submitted by SunnyG (user info) at 2009-05-09 00:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i honestly haven't even seen it yet. i just saw Star Trek though...fucking awesome
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-05-09 00:43:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what was slumdog like? i just figured it was typical hollywood hype "oh look some foreigners made a movie! how cute! they think theyre people! lets give them an award so we feel good about ourselves"
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2009-05-09 00:38:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hello! Is Shlongy still alive?
Hold on I'll go down to the basement and check.
It's getting about time to change his feeding tube.