good news/bad news (1462 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.59 on 73 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Dude, thats BOSH! (View user info) at 2009-09-06 22:10:13 EDT
I kicked the fuck out of a tumor the size of a grapefruit. A good portion of my right lung had to go with it, but i can hardly notice. Recovery is incredibly painful and my medication makes me irritable. Who Cares! Tumor was benign!
the bad news is I quit smoking.
sad face.
yea right.
The tumor was taken out!
Then I smashed it up and put it in scruggs' oatmeal!
User Reviews
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2009-09-13 04:11:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
being dead would not be very bosh
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2009-09-09 18:36:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks everyone!
This is the last time i'll address this because deep down im sure you all don't really care :)
Unfortunately, yes it was a very serious situation.. and despite my light-hearted approach I was very fortunate it was discovered and consequently removed when it was.. I was aspymptomatic, and like i said it was discovered quite by accident.
Had it been left alone I could have developed symptoms and by then it might have been too late.
Its good to not be dead!
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2009-09-09 18:22:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I got no idea if you are serious, but if so good on you.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2009-09-09 17:07:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by reginajacks (user info) at 2009-09-09 04:13:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2009-09-09 03:07:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I cant imagine how the narcotic painkillers im sure they are giving you make you irritable. 7/500's? 10/325's? Rub some dirt on it, Ive had bigger scratches on my eyeball.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2009-09-08 17:29:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well thats good.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-09-08 16:13:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Chemo?
Dude, light up two spliffs and nod in agreement!
Boshman, you and Kottke can now record a great cover version of Molly Hatchet's 'Flirtin' with....Cancer'
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2009-09-08 15:02:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you know I've had my share
Submitted by cheerios (user info) at 2009-09-08 14:02:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Mr.Bun (user info) at 2009-09-08 12:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*Chews a carrot stick and nods in agreement*
Submitted by GroundHorse (user info) at 2009-09-08 11:49:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great to hear that you kicked that tumor in the butt.
<doesn't light up a smoke, but nods in agreement>
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2009-09-08 10:59:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2009-09-08 10:49:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bosh
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2009-09-08 10:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Most Bosh.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2009-09-08 09:59:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Righteous.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2009-09-08 08:43:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*Takes out some bubblicious and nods in agreement*
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2009-09-08 00:08:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2009-09-07 12:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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To settle a bet could you answer a question for me? Yes? Thanks! Do real men say "bingo"?
-------------------------------------
Only if he's a farmer and he's calling his dog. But he won't spell it "B-I-N-G-O", because spelling stuff is for fags.
Submitted by mamboabouttostrike (user info) at 2009-09-08 00:07:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
no effort. next time dont bother. >:(
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-07 23:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fuckboy below
Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2009-09-07 22:26:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2mer
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-09-07 20:27:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hoorah!
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2009-09-07 16:27:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The BOSH Man lives to fight another day!
Submitted by earth_collapse (user info) at 2009-09-07 15:36:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Good news. (Smiley Face)
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2009-09-07 14:21:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That fucking narc Scruggs. I hope he chokes on that tumour.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2009-09-07 13:53:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You mustn't drink milk. Now that you are a man, you drink Beer!
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2009-09-07 13:53:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fuck yeah
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2009-09-07 12:32:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
played
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2009-09-07 12:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-09-07 11:50:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2009-09-07 09:26:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-09-07 04:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Real men don't cry. Real men don't bitch. Real men, men like me, don't give a fuck about shit. Men like me learn from their mistakes, then they make 'em again just because. Then they eat a 96 ounce steak and wash it down with a nice tall glass of buttery mashed potatoes. That's what real men do.
Real men, manly men, fix all their problems with elbow grease, beef jerky, and the American flag. Real men don't drive SUV's, real men drive Dodge trucks. Real men talk about Hemis, Angus beef burgers, and Pamela Anderson. Real men don't give two shits about World Cup soccer or Lance Armstrong. Real men boo Lance Armstrong. Real men have balls.
Manly men like me don't need women. Being manly is about not needin' shit. And womens is less than shit. Me? I jerk off to my reflection and I jizz lighter fluid. Know why? Cause I'm a real manly man.
Real men smoke Marlboro reds and ride wild stallions and drop kick rattlesnakes. Real men shave with chainsaws and guzzle Jim Beam and body slam elephants and throw special ed buses over mountains. Real men punt babies and break things. Real men eat grenades and shit mortar shells. Real men read Shakespeare. Then we laugh at how fuckin' queer it is. That's what real men do.
Real manly men don't do pilates or yoga or hee-cha kung fu fuck. Real men bench press cement trucks and hunt after grizzly bears with a moldy toothrbrush. Hell, I know this sumbitch Tom Jenkins did just that. Didn't come back alive. Died like a man though. More than I can say for you. Shit.
Know what I just did? Grew a beard. Yep. Took two seconds. Damn thing's down to my feet by now. Guess what now. Fuckin' shaved it.
Yeah. Pretty fuckin' manly. Probably goin' to the Hip Hugger later. Probably see you there. If you got the balls.
I ain't got nothin' else to say. Real men don't say much. Ya'll wanna find me, I'll be out in the middle of the street flexin' my muscles and talkin' Nascar.
-------
To settle a bet could you answer a question for me? Yes? Thanks! Do real men say "bingo"?
-------
you'd have to ask mr. bosh that one mr. poots, for that string of words is simply an old post of his which i submitted as a manly review to his manly news.
if i was to hazard a guess, it would be 'yes', as long as you snarled it manacingly while you had a steely glint in your eye.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2009-09-07 11:42:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
survival of the boshest!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-09-07 10:56:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll make up the smoking thing for you. I'm bringing two packs to the track in JAX today. Go me!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-09-07 10:48:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll tell you a secret, my bosh benign friend:
Cigarettes are for faggots.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-07 10:43:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*smiles*
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2009-09-07 10:00:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm on nicotine lozenges....again!
I miss smoking when I drink and when I hang out with my drunk friends that smoke.
Also after meals and when I'm pooping.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2009-09-07 09:40:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bosh
Submitted by HellRazer (user info) at 2009-09-07 09:35:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can you believe I recently CHOSE to quit smoking? I know, fucked up right...
These nicotine patches give you some hella wierd and vivid dreams though, I may keep them around just for that.
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2009-09-07 08:03:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome!
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-09-07 07:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great for you, sucks for *lights cigarette, nods, and leaves.* If your life weren't so boshtastic and were fictional, you could keep using that line though.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-07 07:06:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very Bosh indeed.
Submitted by crosschris (user info) at 2009-09-07 06:42:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great news... proper Boshty!
Submitted by darkwulffe (user info) at 2009-09-07 04:29:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh, this was a great post just for the responses.
Post was decent too, good for you and your lack of tumor things
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 04:26:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I have nice cuticles
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-09-07 04:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Real men don't cry. Real men don't bitch. Real men, men like me, don't give a fuck about shit. Men like me learn from their mistakes, then they make 'em again just because. Then they eat a 96 ounce steak and wash it down with a nice tall glass of buttery mashed potatoes. That's what real men do.
Real men, manly men, fix all their problems with elbow grease, beef jerky, and the American flag. Real men don't drive SUV's, real men drive Dodge trucks. Real men talk about Hemis, Angus beef burgers, and Pamela Anderson. Real men don't give two shits about World Cup soccer or Lance Armstrong. Real men boo Lance Armstrong. Real men have balls.
Manly men like me don't need women. Being manly is about not needin' shit. And womens is less than shit. Me? I jerk off to my reflection and I jizz lighter fluid. Know why? Cause I'm a real manly man.
Real men smoke Marlboro reds and ride wild stallions and drop kick rattlesnakes. Real men shave with chainsaws and guzzle Jim Beam and body slam elephants and throw special ed buses over mountains. Real men punt babies and break things. Real men eat grenades and shit mortar shells. Real men read Shakespeare. Then we laugh at how fuckin' queer it is. That's what real men do.
Real manly men don't do pilates or yoga or hee-cha kung fu fuck. Real men bench press cement trucks and hunt after grizzly bears with a moldy toothrbrush. Hell, I know this sumbitch Tom Jenkins did just that. Didn't come back alive. Died like a man though. More than I can say for you. Shit.
Know what I just did? Grew a beard. Yep. Took two seconds. Damn thing's down to my feet by now. Guess what now. Fuckin' shaved it.
Yeah. Pretty fuckin' manly. Probably goin' to the Hip Hugger later. Probably see you there. If you got the balls.
I ain't got nothin' else to say. Real men don't say much. Ya'll wanna find me, I'll be out in the middle of the street flexin' my muscles and talkin' Nascar.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2009-09-07 02:19:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BOSH
Also kind of BOSCH: http://blogs.suntimes.com/scanners/bosch.jpg
BOSCH!
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:29:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm all for the gay jokes. :)
I have to go do some work, I'm too lazy and shouldn't be expected to do things. Have a nice day in your sunshine..
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:22:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
*blinks*
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:20:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 13:12:36 WST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am an expert on greek.
-----------
Greek love Alexander the Great style?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:13:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
except less easily trained
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:12:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am an expert on greek and I can tell you that an apache is definitely native to north america, like a raccoon.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-07 01:06:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahh they can? See I was under the impression that an apache was some sort of trojan horse. But I'm not greek so what do I know?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:55:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I dare say no, not if they're slightly thicker than a negro and negros can only fry chicken.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:53:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes but can they cook?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:51:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes a savage, and a brutish one at that if lungfish's fellow is anything to go by. Not too easily trained either I'd say, but enough to have a team of them pull a wagon or plough.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Is an apache a type of indigenous?
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:44:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is no need to explain ass to me good sir I am quite the ass expert.
Very well I shall google it or write your Governor.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:31:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm, sorry. I was smoking (sorry, Boshman). And then I had to say goodnight to the kid. Now I have a Budweiser. Shut up, we're in a recession.
I refuse to answer and the grounds that it may incriminate me. And Dances-with-Boone's-Farm-Wine will kick my ass.
That's arse to you, abo.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:18:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's a fairly simple question man. HOW many apaches do you HAVE and could you have more? Are they easily trained and if so to what extent? Negro clever or even better, adorable little monkey from night of the museum 2 clever.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:13:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nope. I got nothing.
Go Springboks.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:07:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hold on. I'm eating soup.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:05:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh....
I say how many apaches are you allowed to own in Arizona?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:05:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You'll need to be quicker than that tonight. I'm not drinking. Yet.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:04:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
is that 'funny you should ask' because you have a witty anecdote to tell or 'funny YOU should ask' because, well - you know.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:02:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...that's what he did for the snake bite. On my peener.
gross
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-07 00:00:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny you should ask...
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-06 23:59:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
did you get one of your apaches to suck it out?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-06 23:56:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I took a cactus spine to the scrotum a couple of weeks ago. That hurt too.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2009-09-06 23:52:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
EEETS NAWT A TOOMAH
IT'S BOSH.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2009-09-06 23:35:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sure that diseased portion of your lung was utterly BOSH, too.
Right now, it's probably laying in a HazMat disposal unit somewhere, stabbing liposuction bags and hitting on aborted fetuses.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2009-09-06 22:57:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-06 22:41:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Far out.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2009-09-06 22:36:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It won't regenerate, but my diaphram will compensate for the missing portion so i won't notice it until maybe i start exercising.
If you post a picture of your dick i will have jack-off material for months, who cares what lisa does.
and no i didn't name it, i was too busy feeding it to scruggs.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2009-09-06 22:32:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Will your lung regenerate? Can you feel a difference when you breathe? Will Lisa post her tits if I post my dick?
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-06 22:26:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you name it? If I had a tumour I would call it barry.