Autumn Freak Watch (774 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: 0.73 on 13 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Technoratty (View user info) at 2009-09-25 11:51:26 EDT
OK...
I live in a large multi-storey car park in the countryside, and at the end of the car-park is a six-foot stone wall It's a charming throwback to a bygone era, a lovely original feature of the property, complete with graffiti, crusted on vomit and shit and this autumn it's also home to a family of freaks. They've chosen to nest in a small hole between the bins and the wall about a third of the way up, the entrance secreted behind the leaves of a young banana tree that's fanning across the wall.
I first noticed the parents coming and goings a few weeks ago, but thought I'd keep it to myself until I was sure the baby freaks had hatched. My children love nature and wildlife, but their enthusiasm they can get the better of them sometimes, and the last thing I wanted was the kids equipping themselves with large sticks and beating the young freaks to death.. Once both freak parents were busy feeding their hungry baby freak the likelihood of that happening was pretty slim, and so when I could hear the insistent screeching and yowling noises that told me they'd arrived I showed the kids the adult freaks' comings and goings, the mutilated body parts, cheese strings and bacon double cheese burgers they were bringing, and, in between the parents' visits, I showed them the nest itself.
In the darkness of the hole you could just make out the forked tongue and yellow eyes glowing. The excitement was palpable.
We've been watching and poking the freaks with sticks ever since, the kids enthralled by every little detail.
User Reviews
Submitted by netimportant (user info) at 2009-09-27 23:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Do you...have her number, by chance?
Submitted by pandora (user info) at 2009-09-27 17:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I hate to say it, but that girl's tongue, while at first gross, is kind of fucking cool. She could walk through Harlem in the middle of the night and she would not get raped. Also, I like how she can move the tips independently (rub them together, etc). That would feel awesome during oral sex. It must be annoying for her whenever she wants to be something besides a snake or a devil for Halloween, though.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-09-26 12:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I used to work with a guy who decided to split his tongue by feeding fishing line through the piercing hole and gradually tightening it. He could barely talk some days because of the swelling. It was pretty retarded.
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-25 17:30:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:23:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:45:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
STFU Bubba
=
you 100% sure, suckboy? prove it.
=======
The proof is you're the only lame, lonely old pedo who tries to use "suckboy" as an insult incessantly.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/110254#2814953
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122304#2900469
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121641#2887286
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121750#2881002
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121337#2867148
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87616#2837824
http://www.ubersite.com/m/85383#2837823
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119827#2815715
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119816#2815684
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119693#2811141
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116734#2711718
http://www.ubersite.com/m/115946#2685108
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114833#2645631
++
So, if I used Howie or dipshit, would that make me Shlongy? Try again.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-09-25 16:08:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:55:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
HEY I LIKE BACON CHEESEBURGERS
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:23:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:45:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
STFU Bubba
=
you 100% sure, suckboy? prove it.
=======
The proof is you're the only lame, lonely old pedo who tries to use "suckboy" as an insult incessantly.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/110254#2814953
http://www.ubersite.com/m/122304#2900469
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121641#2887286
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121750#2881002
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121337#2867148
http://www.ubersite.com/m/87616#2837824
http://www.ubersite.com/m/85383#2837823
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119827#2815715
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119816#2815684
http://www.ubersite.com/m/119693#2811141
http://www.ubersite.com/m/116734#2711718
http://www.ubersite.com/m/115946#2685108
http://www.ubersite.com/m/114833#2645631
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-25 15:23:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:45:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
STFU Bubba
=
you 100% sure, suckboy? prove it.
Submitted by no1hasdis (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:45:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
STFU Bubba
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:41:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
YOU ARE THE ROS* MASTER!!
* run-on sentence.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-09-25 14:33:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The irony is that she probably thinks she's shocking and therefore attractive, when in truth she's just demonstrating the tragic extent of her self-loathing and therefore very much the opposite of attractive.
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2009-09-25 12:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+ 1 because i like Birds
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2009-09-25 12:19:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I bet that thing would be able to give great blowjobs if it weren't for the fangs.
That is all.