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boat funeral (361 hits)

Category: None

Rating: -0.92 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by nigel reid <nigel72092.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2009-11-05 23:04:20 EST


a couple of weeks ago i was speaking with my uncle and he informed me that i would be the executer in his last will and testament. the most major thing i could find that i would have to do is have him cremated and spread his ashes on the pond near our family boat house. now my uncle isn't the healthiest of people as in he has had about three strokes and one heart attack in the last four years. the questioon i pose is if he has a heart attack while fishing in the lake do i have to take him out just to cremate him and put him back or can i just leave him there? i was discussing this with a freind of mine and he suggested that i instead light the boat on fire without removing my uncle my secondary question is should i light hte boat and then push it out or should i anchor the boat in the middle of the lake and shoot it with some sort of flaming arrow? please respond with answers and be gentle i'm new at this

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User Reviews


Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-11-09 21:10:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

def the flaming arrow.

and ead while you're at it.

Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2009-11-08 22:11:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-11-06 03:00:41 PST (#)
Ranking: -2

Or maybe you'll rearrange the letters into Shift Key and use that inspiration to make your drivel at least a little painful to look upon.
--------
Ha ha ha! Skrap, you're on a roll lately.

Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-11-06 20:57:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Shut up, bitch.

Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2009-11-06 15:36:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

petrol and a flamethrower -- that's how gramma did granpa, he was technically alive at the time, porking Mrs Rawlings in her rowing boat, old wrinkly sex ass bobbing up and down yeuch.....

Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-11-06 09:45:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

do whatever you like, just make sure you go fuck yourself.

Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2009-11-06 09:43:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Just make sure you're still on the boat when you light it up.

Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-11-06 06:00:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Use the ashes with some sand and portland cement to make concrete. Pour it into a mold in the shape of eight separate letters: e, f, h, i, k, s, t, and y. Once they're cured, rearrange them into different combinations to see what mysterious messages you might receive from your dearly departed.

Hefty Ski doesn't make a lot of sense.
He Fit Sky is sort of apropos for a dead guy, maybe.
Fish Tyke... is the guy a pedo at all?

Or maybe you'll rearrange the letters into Shift Key and use that inspiration to make your drivel at least a little painful to look upon. Your horrid writing is why he'll eat the shotgun next week, you know.


Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:48:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

There can be all sorts of complications with law enforcement no matter how you handle this. I once drove a dead person 200 miles in the cab of my truck across several county lines to get the deceased to the hospital where her doctor was. He was a friend and did some kind of hushing so I would not get in trouble...
~~~~~~~~~~
Viking burial OH YEAH! Take pictures and post em here. Please oh please.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:28:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

WHY DO YOU HATE MONKEYS!!!

Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:26:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:12:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm not quite sure what it was you just said really but in my humble opinion I would think twice before deciding to make the beast with two backs with an aids riddled whore as condoms can split and then you would be worried and stuff. I hope that helps.
----------
This is the entire problem with Africa. Also you'd not be able to get a blood transfusion anywhere in that place.

Except maybe Egypt. Egypt would probably be ok.

Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:12:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm not quite sure what it was you just said really but in my humble opinion I would think twice before deciding to make the beast with two backs with an aids riddled whore as condoms can split and then you would be worried and stuff. I hope that helps.

Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-11-06 04:09:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Pour them into his widows vag.

Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2009-11-06 00:43:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

I wonder what the fine administration of Kolbe would think about you hanging out on this filthy site.

Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2009-11-05 23:19:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Auto +2 Viking funerals


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