Idiots and their screen names. (9570 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.44 on 44 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hadley (View user info) at 2003-09-01 08:39:53 EDT
Recently, not sure if this is an older problem or not, I have been noticing the completely abstract and attention-seeking AIM screen names that overrun the right side of my screen. My buddy list is full of random words and numbers. I suppose that I can bitch at my own self for this (SoUnsexy00- happens to be a song and AIM attatched numbers) I do not feel like relogging in to Übersite as something else now that I have made this realization, but I do almost want to renig on my AIM registration and sign up again... but this time with a sane, efficient, and recognizable screen name. Maybe something like, oh, I don't know,God forbid, my name. It may end up looking somethng like this: HadleyGreene. If I must, for identification purposes only, I could throw in a "DC" at the end for location or something along those lines.
The screen name that I use for AIM mostly is Hads77. Now, I feel that I can legitimize this because "Hads" is a common nickname for me and on all of my 7 different sports teams, 77 is the number on the back of my jersey. I did not just pull the digits from my ass. When I poke fun of my toolish acquaintances for names such as "Madlaxr00" and "Purfectgrrl" (yes, ask yourself why they would set themselves up in such a way) they retort ever so wittily with "What the hell is Hads77."
Gee, you call me Hads. I'm sorry, asshat, but I am about 97% sure that when walking down the street, your closer buddies don't address you by "Fun2Bwith53". For example, "Did you see what Fun2Bwith53 was wearing today. She's always pushing that "crazy mad funky" style." or
"Yo, Chr0nyc420. You down for tokin' tonight?" "Hey AuthenticPrep. Got that paper due today?"
Some other popular screen names that I absolutely adore (sarcasm, if not already noted, is heavily implied here) are the pansy white suburban boys who want to be thugs...wiggers, I think, would be the politically correct term. This genre of asshole insists on being called by a rap name. I.E.
Redman2258
50centgrinder
Even better are the 14 year old boys who cannot yet drive and thus think they are being ultra badass by promoting their "Avril Levigne" worshipping image with such screen names as:
sk8dawg47. No, I did not make that prepubescent-retainer throwing-ask daddy for weed money name up.
Oh no. Here comes the posse of depressed teenagers with paradoxial, or incorrectly spelled screen names. It's always a barage of IM windows titled:
Bleakfear
foreveryounger
hipurgurl
Burnt4lyfe
jstdsntmakesnse
one for nothing
freezingflames23
Then, the rediculously irksome "Lil"s. These pompous dipshits of human beings get their own god damned category. That's what they want, right? Cute, original, and unbe-fucking-lievably, top-notch, ghetto-booty, and "sweetly seductive" as my friend, known as "Lilhvngrl9" so eloquently put it. The following is a list of the offenders, those guilty of the highest crime against civilized internet usage,the girls who think they are being clever, and the boys who... well, must have been neglected as children. I give you... The Lil's.
LilMinkwrr
Lilbadazz
Lilmissy78
Lilprincess8
Lilprncssssss00
Lilcutyp2ty
LilQTsweet
Lilsweethrt
LildvlLilangl
Lilsexgdss
Lilsexibby
Lilsxxxangl
Lilhottie67
Lilswttart4u
the list, sadly, goes on. I feel rather confident that you get my point. My tolerence with utterly useless and seemingly idiotic screennames is growing smaller by the IM. The pain that I feel every time I see "Lil"... it is simply indescribable. If I ever have children, and they ever dare to make a screenname using the "word" "Lil" they will be grounded, lashed, starved, and verbally abused until I feel that I have sufficiently ingrained my message into their fragile and impressionable minds. That will likely be after they have died from my beatings. But in my mind, the little fuckers will deserve it.
-Hads.
psh, Lil'..... what kind of asshole......
"Hey iTzThEcRaZyAzN. Are you and QTbAbyviEtPrNcSs still together?"
User Reviews
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-10 06:34:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
... this must be a complete idiot who wrote this. one of the worst things anyone (especially a kid) can do is use a screen name that reveals too much of their personal info. date of birth? jesus, just invite the rapist into your house why dont you. real name? ohhh, thats brilliant. give some 60 year old pervert more ammo to use against you.
there are more important things to get heated over than this. grow up.
Submitted by The_Wizard (user info) at 2004-10-03 15:10:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually, people do call me the Wizard. But it's true about retarded screennames.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-10-03 14:16:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
excellent
timdwpi
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-04-17 21:24:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just tried to register my name as a screen name. Apparently JanHartigan is already taken. What the shit? I thought my name was somewhat original.
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-02-06 00:46:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My screen names own all. My AIM is YoureAGirlPants and my yahoo! is the_amazing_rand0
apparently some one else had the idea to use a vague movie reference...
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2004-01-28 23:49:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post. The best screen names I've seen to date:
13low Job for Jesus
OprahsAnalBeads
Submitted by manthemoose at 2004-01-28 23:31:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i dont agree but it was fun to read!
Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2004-01-10 06:16:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post.
By the by: "It was either 'blujnbbyqn'..."
Shit, I guess I'm old, cause I caught that connection right away...
Submitted by smokymtcsw (user info) at 2004-01-06 11:57:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It is too bad that we are stuck with the screename we came up with when we were 13. The area I lived and my initials sure seemed smart at the time...
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-01-05 22:12:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SatansPetMonkey (user info) at 2003-09-01 15:41:42 (#)
Ranking: 1
what is an asshat?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-01-05 22:11:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by SatansPetMonkey (user info) at 2003-09-01 15:41:42 (#)
Ranking: 1
wow... deep... what catagory do i fall into? yet again i must ask... what is an asshat?
Submitted by blujnbbyqn (user info) at 2003-09-03 03:04:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree with you on pretty much every point. You have no idea how it pains me to admit that. I have a 15 year old daughter who's current boyfriend's screen name is - I kid you not - 'somethinglessthanhuman'. What the fuck? His name is Josh. He has a deeply rooted Buffy the Vampire Slayer fixation. But why the F'ed up SN? One reason could be that his last name is, get this, Peppersack! Oh the fun we have here when his unfortunate name shoes up on caller ID.
I chose the screen names for the family when we started up with the whole home-internet thing. The nicknames that our clan wound up with are not very original. My daughter's name is pretty simple and probably too informative. It's just her first name, her last initial and the year she was born. My 11 year old son's name is a little more inventive and fits him to a T - 'mineallmine'. As far as I know they haven't tried to change their screen names into asinine and misleading monikers like you described in your post.
My own ubersite name is as cheesy as it can get. I pulled it straight outa the music scene. It was either 'blujnbbyqn' or 'Candy-O' Thankfully there are precious few fellow ubersiters that can even make the connection. If this debate were taking place in the late 70's though, I'd get my share of ridicule. So I suppose that it all depends on your perspective. Just looking back at some of the CB radio handles folks had back in the "Smokey and the Bandit" days should tell you that this too shall pass. The next generation of names should put the curent ones to shame.
Michelle, My bell....
Submitted by Justme (user info) at 2003-09-02 13:03:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fatman aww... i will be nice!!
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2003-09-02 12:48:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Here is my AIM Screen Name - OK2BTPK
It means "Its OK to be a Trailer Park Kid". I grew up living and hanging out in trailer parks. I wouldn't trade my experiences there for anything.
OK, go ahead....hit me with your jokes and insults.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2003-09-02 11:38:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounsexy00?
What makes this screen name better than that of the others you mentioned?
Submitted by drunken_itchy (user info) at 2003-09-02 02:45:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I give about a shit and a half about AIM or the teeny fucks who use it. Die for caring. Pissant.
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2003-09-02 00:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
**Quartermain~ this is deliberately kissing your ass, but thank you. That seems to be my mission here in an abstract, not my main goal but still an aim, sort of way. And your opinion is highly respected around here, by me anyway.**
Look at me, I'm blushing and stuff. I don't think my opinions have ever been respected before. Mostly people just listen in the hopes that when I'm done I'll go away.
Submitted by Miss_Sim (user info) at 2003-09-01 23:00:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree. My younger sister used to have PurfectKitty or some crap like that - she's not gotten rid of that - Thank GOD!
Submitted by Slovin (user info) at 2003-09-01 22:15:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I concur.
Submitted by MOssiah (user info) at 2003-09-01 21:42:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I agree. Although I can hardly talk with my name.
Submitted by Simple_Plan614 (user info) at 2003-09-01 21:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
death to wiggers
torturous death to anyone with lil in their names
god dammit
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2003-09-01 21:22:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This really reminds me of that Frasier episode where his dad gets a personalized plate that says RDWRRER, he is the Road Warrior, awesome
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-09-01 17:55:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I always thought it would be funny to print up really formal looking business cards with an email address like badkitty69.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2003-09-01 17:34:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by zootsuitriot (user info) at 2003-09-01 16:00:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
excelsior!! especially the bleak one and the Chr0nyc420
also annoying though that crappy thing asian kids do with the x like xXcrAZN4LiFeXx
Submitted by CockPoop (user info) at 2003-09-01 15:50:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Very true, but not funny or entertaining. You seem to know a lot of dumbasses, dumbass.
Submitted by SatansPetMonkey (user info) at 2003-09-01 15:41:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
wow... deep... what catagory do i fall into? yet again i must ask... what is an asshat?
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-09-01 15:28:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I like this Uber teen. Hope you stay.
Submitted by Anti-Christ Superstar at 2003-09-01 15:14:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If my screen name was the same as what people actually called me, then i would have to have it as any one of Alex, Bernard, Ryan, Teddy Bear, Koala Boy or Tufty the squirrel.
I shit you not, that is what people actually call me.
Submitted by shadowdragon (user info) at 2003-09-01 14:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i have some friends with SNs like that. theyre mainly the ones that i don't recognize.
Submitted by Sounsexy00 (user info) at 2003-09-01 13:09:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
another +2 because Insane egged me on.
Quartermain~ this is deliberately kissing your ass, but thank you. That seems to be my mission here in an abstract, not my main goal but still an aim, sort of way. And your opinion is highly respected around here, by me anyway.
-Hads.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-09-01 12:45:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-09-01 12:07:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hadley, bellebrown, I rate my own posts and anyother's or that matter howeverthefuck I see fit.
Who cares about fauxpas?
Fuck what anyone things, my ratings are usually:
1. initially by the post itself
2. my second reply will usually be in response to a previous reply (if they made me smile (+1) ) and this has nothing to do with the post.
My point? Sometimes I rate my own and other's posts on different things.
Who cares?
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-09-01 11:58:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aim sucks, i only use it at work.
and whilst checking email.
who cares what handle one uses?
On the other hand, it does give a true look into their personality.
Deep.
Submitted by Sounsexy00 (user info) at 2003-09-01 11:30:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 on my own post. Über fauxpas. but im rating enough that my 0's bring it down :( oh well.
Belle-
I believe we are on the same wavelength here. way to rock.
-Hads.
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2003-09-01 11:30:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know, you keep writing worthwhile stuff like this and you'll destroy the stereotype of the Uber-teen.
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2003-09-01 11:21:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well said.
I also add anyone who uses text ALL THE TIME.
Eg: Hi, wot u up 2 2nite? FanC a buze l8r? Stell sez ur not bz. wna call r8chl 4 me, i lost her no? THNX M8.
LEARN TO TYPE YOU BIG DUMB FUCKS.
Submitted by jimbobjoe (user info) at 2003-09-01 10:12:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Cock Poop. What more need be said.
Submitted by Natophelia (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:50:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Anything with a '4u' on the end... For ME? Huh?
Submitted by Sounsexy00 (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:49:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cock Poop, eh. Toughie. I believe he would fall into the prepubescent-tough guy- skater mixed wiht the wigger category.... Maybe i will have to rethink and add a few..... but I didnt want this to be another one of those "Categorize the people around you and make a lovely list" posts
-Hads.
Submitted by ess2s2 (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm, yes. I feel as though you may be on to something here...Where does CockPoop fall into that category?
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I'm in love.
Submitted by PopNFresh (user info) at 2003-09-01 09:24:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I feel your pain
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2003-09-01 08:45:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
agreed.