Blagged.....* (932 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.5 on 23 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tartpumper (View user info) at 2003-09-09 10:20:13 EDT
I was walking through the Fishergate Shopping Centre (my local mall) when a beautiful girl stopped me.
'You look like the kinda guy who likes a drink' she said. I felt offended. I did have a hangover though, black bags under my eyes and probably smelt of alcohol.
'Would you like some free drinks vouchers?'. Why not, I thought, after all Im a raving alcoholic.
She handed me a scratch card from her clipboard and asked me to scratch off the layer of silver and see what I could win if I 'sign up' today. The 'signing up' put me off a tad so I said I didnt want to and tried to walk off.
'Just scratch it off first and see what you could win' she said. Anyone who is familiar with Father Ted - she sounded like the tea lady, Mrs Doyle except she was about 19 and drop dead gorgeous. 'Go on, go on, go on....etc'.
What harm can it do? I can still say no. So I scratch off the panel to reveal I have won a three day cruise to Spain.
'WOW!', she screams, 'theres only ten of those to give away! It must be you lucky day!'.
'Bollocks' I thought. So then I said it. 'Bollocks love, its a scam, seeya later'.
'Nooo, come and look at the brochure and I'll prove it. Its a cruise to Spain for you and three mates, come and have a look.'
I sighed and decided I will have a look. I can still say no.....
She sits me down at a table in the middle of the shopping centre with everyone looking at me and starts to ream off her pre-planned 'trip to Spain winner speech'.
Basically, what I have won is a cruise on a big boat to Spain for four people for 3 days, 2nights. Its a four berth room, en-suite and I also get free parking at the docks because I will have to drive from Preston (North England) to Plymouth (very South England). Thats not bad I think.
'OK', I said 'whats the catch?'
'No catch, the other part is also of benefit to you'. She looks at me with big brown eyes in her tight little outfit, her tits looked as though they were going to rip through her top. I imagined her naked, covered in cream, with a dildo going in and...
Blah!! I woke up. I need my wits about me.
'Go on then, lets hear it'.
To cut a long story short, for £50 I get £450 worth of drinks vouchers for the six most popular clubs/bars in town. Hmmmmmm......
I sit there thinking.....mostly about how much I want to bum the girl in front of me and then spunk in her mouth and not about the £50 ($80 at a guess) Im about to part with. I know now why these gorgeous girls are employed to do these jobs.
'You can bring it back tomorrow and we'll rip up the receipt and you give the vouchers back but I'll warn you, if you do that your throwing away a free trip'. She smiles. I get a hardon.
'Honestly, these drink vouchers work I'll even come to the bar with you to prove it'. I nearly do a man wee.
'And, I think you will be bringing me flowers tomorrow'.
A wet patch appears at the front of my trousers.
Anyway, as you can guess I signed up for it, gave her my credit card details but Im in two minds whether or not to take it back. I need advice. If I take it back I will lose a three day trip to Spain with four friends and £450 worth of drinks vouchers (which is slightly exagerated, more like £200) or risk wasting £50 for a dodgy trip on a ferry and bouncers laughing at me when I hand them a piece of paper saying 'Free drink' on it.
What should I do?
* - http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=blagged
User Reviews
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-10-07 06:15:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Bit of an update:
I tested my drinks vouchers this weekend and, believe me, they work! You just feel a bit of dick ordering loads of drinks at a packed bar because when you hand over one of the vouchers you have to show a sort of identity card. This card is a bright silver colour with my photo on. Yes its gay. Not complaining though, I got so wasted without spending much money for once! It was my b'day though and I managed to blag two bottles of cheap champagne.
As far as the holiday goes, hmmmmm. I got a sort of 'flyer' with a detachable voucher 'entitling myself and three friends and exciting cruise to Spain!' and not much more information, ie: where the fuck the boat is!
And the gorgeous girl.......I ended up pulling her and fucking her all over my bedroom, in her tits her pussy and her sexy little ass.
Oh shit, nevermind. That was when I was wanking the other night. Forget that last sentence.
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-09-22 11:45:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2003-09-21 13:57:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
Aaargh! That SAME bitch stopped me and pestered me into scratching stuff. The brunette one near "Game" right? Nevertheless, I won a holiday. But missed valuable drinking time talking to the whore. Thing is, I am good at avoiding those people usually and I wandered round the outside of the crowd she was near. She saw me and ran at me. Fuck.
Yeh, Yeh thats the bitch! Nice wasnt she and her tits were either fake or god shaped them for tit fucking.
Anyways, I got my holiday and I can take it whenever I want.....nothing dodgy as yet, will post more when I find out more....
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-09-21 14:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I sit there thinking.....mostly about how much I want to bum the girl in front of me and then spunk in her mouth and not about the £50 ($80 at a guess) Im about to part with. I know now why these gorgeous girls are employed to do these jobs.
'You can bring it back tomorrow and we'll rip up the receipt and you give the vouchers back but I'll warn you, if you do that your throwing away a free trip'. She smiles. I get a hardon.
'Honestly, these drink vouchers work I'll even come to the bar with you to prove it'. I nearly do a man wee.
'And, I think you will be bringing me flowers tomorrow'.
A wet patch appears at the front of my trousers.
================================================================
HO HO HO, THAT FUNNY!!!
this is great. just do what i did when that happened to me- me and The Dude were in Austin meeting up with Loren. after Loren had retired for the night (i guess when you get to be over 30, you can't drink all night anymore. hehe), we were walking down 6th street, and these two gorgeous girls come up to us and keep trying to convince us to go inside this bar. The Dude is like "ok!", and i'm like, "come on, Dude, let's keep going. that place looks like a shithole." he convinces me to give it a try, so we go in there and there's like, nobody in there but a bunch of guys that look like gang members. so they chicks are like "what do you want to drink? we'll get it for you!" and i say, we don't want anything, we're leaving. then they say they'll get up on the bar and do sexy dancing with each other if we stay. i tell her, "how about we walk out of here, and if you say one more word to me, i'll knock your fucking teeth down your throat, skank. sound good to you?" they were speechless, and i turned and walked out with The Dude.
don't let beautiful women convince you to do anything, unless they are convincing you to have sex with them. tell this bitch to suck it.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2003-09-21 14:06:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Erm...you weren't supposed to take her advice. You'll be on some "Blagolidays From Hell 2003" show hosted by Davina McCall sometime mid-Autumn. Mind you, I was also hungover and felt offended.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-09-21 14:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking nice.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2003-09-21 13:57:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Aaargh! That SAME bitch stopped me and pestered me into scratching stuff. The brunette one near "Game" right? Nevertheless, I won a holiday. But missed valuable drinking time talking to the whore. Thing is, I am good at avoiding those people usually and I wandered round the outside of the crowd she was near. She saw me and ran at me. Fuck.
Submitted by dot (user info) at 2003-09-21 13:40:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2003-09-09 12:43:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You got her excited. Well done. ;)
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-09-09 12:33:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well when I scratched the panel she got dead excited and said only 10 Spain cruises get given away. She even scratched the panel of the next scratch card and it had won a free T-Shirt.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2003-09-09 12:27:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tartpumper : I regularly frequent those fine establishments in the 'pool.
At the very least it cost you 50 quid to ogle a fit bird and get shit faced.
The vouchers do work, a mate of mine did it. Don't know anything about the Spain cruise though.
Submitted by Party03 (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:50:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HOLY SHIT THAT CHICK IS DEVASTATING!!!! Send her to Mildenhall after you're done with her!!!!!
Submitted by SubstnceP (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:46:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bring her flowers and ask her to go with you.
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:45:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Im gonna take her some flowers tomorrow and ask her out and then if she is blagging me she will feel guilty.
Who am I kidding? She looks like this: http://www.apechild.com/gallery/castav.php?ddy=30.jpg
I have no chance. I will just wait for her to finish work, jump her, pull her knickers down and punish her for even contemplating tricking me. Then steal £50.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:37:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
get her to go to the bar with you.
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:20:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ive got a massive book of drinks vouchers so I doubt they will give me the money. I could sell some I suppose?
Also it wont be a lecture thing because I can go at anytime in the next 12 months, I choose when I go. A boat sets off from Plymouth everyday.
Heres the website, theres some in Liverpool Apollo!! http://www.tribe-uk.com
I was speaking to a work mate who said he went on the same cruise which he paid for outright and had a blast. It cost £50 per person.
Hmmmmmmmm........
Submitted by Fritolay (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:14:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ask her to deduct the $50 from the $450 dollars you have won. In effect, ask her to give you only $400, and say, "Works out to the same thing, doesn't it?" You were scammed. I don't know how to make Pound signs.
Submitted by marc (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:12:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dont do it . here in the states we have these scam arts as well. if it is an actuall trip you will probally have to sit through a lecture everyuday and if you miss oen you have to pay back the trip. the lectures are usually trying to get you to buy timeshares or soem other trival crap you dont need and never really own. also when you sign up look and make sure your not payign $50 (or pounds rather as i dotn have that symbol on my keyboard) a week or monthy with a total renewal on there part with you having to just through 3 flamming hoops and give up your first born to unsubcribe....... this is a scam. they are always scams. if it sounds to good to be true IT IS.
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:11:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yea... i smell a rat..
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2003-09-09 11:05:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
She has given me a receipt with all the Terms and Conditions on and it does say there will be no extra charge.
The other bonus is, in England we pay way too much for cigarettes and alcohol, WAY TOO MUCH. So on a boat cruise I get duty free and this makes them a hell of a lot cheaper. Then in Spain they are also less than half price so I could buy LOADS of the stuff and bootleg it all to people making my £50 back. And on top of that I have the drinks vouchers for cheap drinks in town. I just dont know what to do..........
Thats Mrs Doyle in the picture by the way.
Submitted by spunker at 2003-09-09 10:54:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounds like a blag to me sunshine. You'll probably end up paying for something. I won a cruise as well once, just had to pay for a return flight from heathrow to florida. Yaah reeet.
Submitted by Trailblazer (user info) at 2003-09-09 10:52:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
A similar thing happened to me a few years back... except I actually was already on holiday in Ibiza and there is this woman trying to get me to scratch some card as "I could win a fabulous trip to Greece". I never could understand why they were trying to pitch a holiday to those people already on holiday. There's always a catch with these things. If there werent, what would be in it for the person offering you the deal? You can't get something for nothing in this world. Well, unless you want a free 3 month old cheese sandwich from out of your neighbours trash can.
The lass was there to get people like your good self to become engrossed in what she had to sell. It worked too.
Submitted by citizenkained (user info) at 2003-09-09 10:41:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well you could take this as a blag and take the holiday and beer tokens back.
From the story it sounds like the attractive girl had successfully carried out a (sales pitch) on you and got u interested. This is the typical sign of a sure rip off.
Or you could take some work chums (me) on a cruise and get pissed with the tokens.
You need to find some people that have fell for this trick before to find out if this is the real deal or just some trick to nick your hard earned cash.
Or you could just discard all of the above and focus on the cruise.
hahhaha im no help, just take us on holiday dammit.
Submitted by Party03 (user info) at 2003-09-09 10:35:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Take the drinks, take the hotty up on her offer to go with you to get good and liquored up at one of the pubs (for free), and when she's drunk fuck the shit out of her. If she's good enough take her on the trip with you and poke her on the boat too.