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Go ahead ask me for a cigarette, asshole. (560 hits)

Category: None

Rating: -1.5 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by providerofmusic.at.yahoo.com (View user info) at 2003-09-11 22:22:53 EDT


I have a big problem with people. I hate most of them, and a lot of them smoke. I don't smoke because I don't spend my time dicking around with tobacco and other dumbshit that should be illegal for use around me. I would rather break my teeth on a high speed escalator. Escalators are for pricks anyway.

I was just about to take a bite of my lunch when I noticed I smelled the hot crap out of a decaying bodies ass. But when I pulled my spoon out of my mouth to turn around and see where it was I saw that this dickhead was smoking like 4 feet away from my food asking me "small talk irrelevant questions" such as "when you quit'n today boys?" Right after I blow your house up with all your ass tobacco inside of it.

back to the point, the other night I ate a shit load of doritos and I decided to go jogging. And right when I was looking in some girls window to watch her undress as I was jogging, this moron waltzed on up to me and he was smoking. This is what he said to me without taking his cig out. "hey bro, you got a stoggie?" This bothers me because people that just ask for things before anything else happends should just go into a homotose and die. After I stuffed his remains into a moving train I realized that I could buy some cigarettes and when someone asks me if I have one I could charge them like $4/cig. Then I realized I was an asshole for thinking that and slowly started choking myself at the park. This happens all the time because of my hate for smoke.

More people should smoke around me, that way the smoker population will dwindle more rapidly.

cigcov.jpg (24 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by Slovin (user info) at 2003-09-11 22:54:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

DUDE, I _totally_ have the same problem with... people like you.

JUMP UP MY ASS

Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2003-09-11 22:40:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Dude, can I get a smoke from you?

Submitted by chipolatte (user info) at 2003-09-11 22:36:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

Wow, this was great, MADDOX.

Submitted by Yes at 2003-09-11 22:34:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

homotose? new word?

don't be sucha prick.

Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2003-09-11 22:26:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

+1 for: "Escalators are for pricks anyway."
-1 for: The rest of it.


Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time.
Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well, good night.

-- Homer Simpson
Bart the Fink