Trapped In The Mind Of a Teenage Goth - A Diary (3514 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.2 on 40 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <Catscradle> (View user info) at 2003-09-20 18:44:55 EDT
Recently, due to events which I am still unable to explain, I was trapped in the mind of a teenage Goth.
I'm not talking an Ostrigoth or Visigoth or Gotham city citizen, but an actual 15 year old black lipstick wearing fuck-the-establishment Goth. For a whole week. Quite frightening, I know. I kept a diary of my experiences.
Day 1:
Went to the Mall. Met my friends. Hung out. Made fun of all the 'hip' popular kids going into Abercrombie and Fitch. Called them all sheep, then followed all the cool Goth guys into Hot Topic. I hate conformity. Later, I went to the music store and got a copy of my favorite Thrash metal band, Noise. They are fucking hardcore. I said that outloud, and the clerk told me not to curse. I yelled 'Fuck the Establishment' and walked out with my back slouched and my hands in my pockets. I tripped walking out because the chain attached from my wallet to my belt loops is so long and so massive I could tow a truck with it. After stumbling over my chain, I went to the body art place. I like it there, because they like me hate it when people judge how cool a person is by the way he or she looks. Looking different is cool. I am different. Therefore I am cool.
Day 2:
Listened to Noise all the way home from school in my friend Oswald's car. I hate life. Why does it even matter? We're just a vague collection of molecules stumbling around onto another molecules. Nothing really matters. Whoa. That was deep. That was philosophical. Therefore, I am cool. I got beat up at school today because I painted my fingernails black. Fuck the establishment! I hate the preps and jocks, THEY'RE ALL THE SAME. Little do they know, I save money because with my black eyes I don't need to buy black eye liner anymore.HAHAHAHA.
Day 3:
Had my scrotum pierced. Pain is cool. I enjoy pain. Therefore I am cool. Afterwards, I hung out in a graveyard with my friends Oswald and Draco. That's right, his name is Draco. Got a problem with that? So what if his name isn't a stereotypical rape of the English language like all you preppy jock SUV driving assholes? I HATE STEREOPTYPES. Thinking about that got me so worked up that I killed my neighbor's cat.
Day 4:
Renounced my status as a homo sapien in this world and pronounced myself Sklor the Vampire. Glared at all the neighborhood kids. Slit my wrists so that all the kids at school will think I'm a hardcore Goth (which I am).
Day 5:
FUCK THE ESTABLISHMENT!
Day 6:
Went to a high school football game. IT WAS SUCH BULLSHIT. They are all SHEEP. I jammed Noise in the parking lot in Oswald's car to protest but the yuppie SUV assholes were all inside the stadium. I hate stereotypes. Hung out at the graveyard after the game with Draco and Oswald.
Day 7:
Got my ear pierced. Now, I don't have to wear my magnetic one anymore. Normally, you have to have a parent there but Oswald pretended to be my brother. It was cool! Now, I just have to get my tongue forked! I hate stereotypes.
Day 8:
I recovered and am now my former self again. My 7 days in the mind of a Goth were quite possibly the most frightening experiences of my life. I guess in conclusion, all I have to say is "FUCK THE ESTABLISHMENT!"
User Reviews
Submitted by hyuugadragoness (user info) at 2007-11-07 15:56:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
What the heck? seriously, thats just insulting. We dont do stupid things like that. Do you think Goths are just THINGS that have no feelings and just want to be known as emo kids who pay too much attention to other people? Image is everything? If you were truely trapped in the mind of a teenage goth, you might be able to realize that even if this is a joke, which, for some odd reason, I highly doubt that, it's insulting. Very insulting. Or, if it was MY mind, you'd be emotionally scarred for life.Even so, I feel it's a waste to explain what goes on in the mind of TRUE Goths and not posers like you oh so foolishly describe. XP
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-11-09 16:17:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You don't want this retard coming with you. He'd disgrace hell.
Submitted by gothic_child at 2004-11-08 12:15:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
aw man fuck u. you say u hate stereotypes? hell, you are one. im a goth, and no your just a piece of shit. goths aren't like that, hating the world becasue of the prep chiken shits. you can come to hell with me for aLL I CARE YOU FUCKIN PIECE OF FUCK.
Submitted by ciaran delaney <ciaran_delaney_4.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-09-29 13:25:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
found that very missrepresenting actual goths and isnt fucking the system a punk rock thing and not a goth thing.
Submitted by Kent_Weirdo (user info) at 2004-07-22 07:00:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Katey <briar_rose666.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-03-13 21:37:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
k was this an experiment or wut (it seems more like a fucking joke)? Being a goth is freeing yourself from fucking society. It's doing what you want to do and not what others tell you to do. "omg i slit my wrists and listen to the music therefore i am a goth!" like wtf? thats not how it fucking is you fucking...i'm not even gunna say it. You can't act like a goth for a bloody week and automatically know whats inside their heads. You just can't automatically know anything! So your fucking views on us goths should change only if you are a goth...pretty much permanently, not for a fucking week. And yes I am a goth...deal with it!
--------------------
Whoa! What the fuck was that?!
Goth isn't about individuality. It's all about superficiality and this tacky darkness image.
One definition of goth that I read was that the kids try to emulate the architexture and the atmosphere of the 17th century area, which is often described as "mysterious and dark," but I don't buy that.
Think you're an individual because you listen to Bauhaus and wear black pleather pants? I've seen more than ten people in my town walking around in the same ensemble: Black pleather pants, cheap black long-coat, torn fish-net shirt with a red marblized pattern, and a spiked choker, all of which were without a doubt purchased at Hot Topic, for outrageous prices. Yes, with the right amount of cash, the local Hot Topic can turn YOU into a bonified Goth- I mean, loser.
There is no attitudes and beliefs that come with the Goth lifestyle, because Goth is nothing more than FASHION.
Submitted by Akegata (user info) at 2004-07-22 06:37:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I loves this.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-05-07 04:33:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Katey <briar_rose666.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-03-13 21:37:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
k was this an experiment or wut (it seems more like a fucking joke)? Being a goth is freeing yourself from fucking society. It's doing what you want to do and not what others tell you to do. "omg i slit my wrists and listen to the music therefore i am a goth!" like wtf? thats not how it fucking is you fucking...i'm not even gunna say it. You can't act like a goth for a bloody week and automatically know whats inside their heads. You just can't automatically know anything! So your fucking views on us goths should change only if you are a goth...pretty much permanently, not for a fucking week. And yes I am a goth...deal with it!
Did she copy paste that from the original post or did she write it herself? I can't tell.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2004-04-23 12:18:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
is it still alright to be a t-shirt/jeans, AC/DC listening, videogames playing kinda guy???
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-04-12 16:42:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Alright, so who here is responsible for digging up really old stuff?
Submitted by T.chow (user info) at 2004-04-12 16:35:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by slowlyrotting (user info) at 2004-04-12 16:25:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i want my girlfriend to dress in all black and paint her fingernails black and dye her hair black and wear black makeup (lipstick, lots of eyeliner) and then
SUCK MY FUCKING DICK
woo woo
i hate goth bitches
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-04-12 16:18:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
brilliant.
Submitted by pieeatingpirate (user info) at 2004-03-13 22:07:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
don't you love making fun of dumb people?
i paint my nails black
usually wear black
have a lip piercing
like punk music
like celtic music
skateboard
like to write
read
love the simpsons and family guy
get mostly A's but a couple of B's
play bass
wear band shirts or tv show shirts or funny shirts but not company shirts becasue i feel i am a walking billboard and should be paid to werar that shit as it is free advertisement
what "group" do i belong in?
Submitted by Katey <briar_rose666.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-03-13 21:37:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
k was this an experiment or wut (it seems more like a fucking joke)? Being a goth is freeing yourself from fucking society. It's doing what you want to do and not what others tell you to do. "omg i slit my wrists and listen to the music therefore i am a goth!" like wtf? thats not how it fucking is you fucking...i'm not even gunna say it. You can't act like a goth for a bloody week and automatically know whats inside their heads. You just can't automatically know anything! So your fucking views on us goths should change only if you are a goth...pretty much permanently, not for a fucking week. And yes I am a goth...deal with it!
Submitted by hamilton (user info) at 2003-12-29 20:26:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It would be true if social classes still existed in schools.
Unfortunately, they don't.
Maybe thats just because I live in Canada...
Submitted by magryan at 2003-10-31 21:26:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
As if the post itself wasnt good enough...
Submitted by korthrun (user info) at 2003-10-31 21:08:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
"hey your a stupid fuck you fucking ass! you don't know hoe hard goths haveit so fucking eat cok and die! "
Apparently they have it so hard they cannot pay attention in english class.
that put it over the top. Goth chicks are hot though, uberhot, youve got to give them that.
Submitted by korthrun (user info) at 2003-10-31 21:08:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"hey your a stupid fuck you fucking ass! you don't know hoe hard goths haveit so fucking eat cok and die! "
Apparently they have it so hard they cannot pay attention in english class.
Also they bring it on them selves. It's not like people pick on them and they go join other goths. they do stupid shit that makes people give them a hard time. Think about it. If they didn't try to 'rebel' by just being like the other goths (conformity sucks, but at least I am like these other goths) they woulnd't have it so hard.
If they would just...are you ready.....sit down, this part is hard as hell for goths to accept.....BE THEMSELVES!!!! Thats right, if they would just be the people they are instead of trying so hard to 'stand out' or 'be different' by being things that they ARE NOT. They wouldn't have it so hard.
Submitted by fuck off at 2003-10-31 20:33:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
hey your a stupid fuck you fucking ass! you don't know hoe hard goths haveit so fucking eat cok and die!
Submitted by jimbo (user info) at 2003-10-05 16:43:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Beautiful! It made me cry.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2003-09-28 06:00:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
pretty much what i expected.
the whole stereotype thing is funny to me. i love stereotypes personally. but i cant understand why people get either deeply offended by others conformism or deeply offended at others pointing out thier conformism. we are all stereotypes in one way or another, just fucking deal with it - bar some minor cosmetic differences youre no different from me.
still, i hate those fucking goths, they think theyre so fucking smart with their black lace and sylvia plath and all. cunts.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2003-09-22 08:38:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Very good, now do one about twats that use internet acronyms. I fucking hate that. (see two replies down, idiot)
Submitted by ronnockeem (user info) at 2003-09-21 20:13:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
very good, is hot topic really owned by the gap?
Submitted by Maleficus (user info) at 2003-09-21 11:17:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1 acronymn, eight words. ROTFLMFAO
Submitted by Gillespie (user info) at 2003-09-21 11:02:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and Dutch music sounds like reggae.
-J
Submitted by Gillespie (user info) at 2003-09-21 11:00:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, I read the whole thing. I didn't really find it funny or enlightening, however, it was definetly an impressive work in irony.
(this is the part of my reply where I try to say something funny)
Nope, didn't work... I think that post robbed me of my sense of humor.
-J
Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2003-09-21 07:39:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Acarnis - I'm not Australian. Why the hell would you think that? I'm Dutch.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-09-21 04:18:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"we could do it together"
uh... thanks for the offer, but no.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-09-21 03:59:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
bart- we could do it together. oh wait, someone just got kicked out of the military for getting it done. i guess i'll have to wait a year to be cool....
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-09-21 03:43:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now I want to fork my tongue.
Submitted by EvilZurr (user info) at 2003-09-21 02:49:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
who ever said i was offended by this post?
Submitted by Habitat at 2003-09-21 00:05:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The first post to actually make me laugh out loud in a long, long time. Thanks dude. That was awesome.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-09-20 22:37:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck the establishment!
Submitted by virgil (user info) at 2003-09-20 20:38:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by K.M (user info) at 2003-09-20 20:29:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by dot (user info) at 2003-09-20 20:18:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
hot topic is owned by Gap
Submitted by Sounsexy00 (user info) at 2003-09-20 20:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
EvilZurr~
I believe what the author is trying to get across is that, though many people, including myself, are like you, there are MANY MANY MANY..... *insert infinate many's here* ....... teenage assholes out there. And we don't really see it. But, they do outnumber us, the "normal"-esque *uhoh stereotype* ones. And your first statement about everything being a stereotype was true- and the exact point of this post. So don't take this personally. The asshole goths who think exactly like this should. And I know they are out there. And think exactly like this because some of them are my friends, and some of them are just constantly hanging out in front of Hot Topic.
I hope you enjoyed being personally offended by this here post.
-Hads.
Submitted by EvilZurr (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:50:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this is all i have to say: there are thousands of stereotypes in the world. even being anti-stereotype is a stereotype. the only people who dont comform are the people who dont know what conform is, or what a stereotype is. the majority of these people just do what they do because they like it. they are, oddly enough, labeled being stereotypical in their nonchalant lifestyle. people need to shut up about 'jock this' and 'goth that', 'that *insert race* fucker should go *insert stereotypical racial slang*'. how did this all start anyways?
i dont really belong anywhere, i should say, but thats probably said too much. is it a stereotype to be friends with everyone on the spectrum? i just do shit like i do and look like i do because its the most comfortable way for me to get through the day. not to go into the teen angst thing, but lets just toss a few things out. tell me if it 'fits in' anywhere:
-i wear clothes with company/band names on them. usually its because my friends are in the band and im supporting them. either that, or i support the company because i use their products a lot (i.e. ive worn Vans since i was 8). am i a tool, then?
-i sometimes sag my pants. this is because im too fucking lazy to pull em up/wear a belt. does this give off some sort of image im oblivious to?
-i skate. i do it cause its fun. i also surf and do all sorts of other sports. does this send out some image too?
Submitted by Illicit_Joe (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:48:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your all sheep!
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:31:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I reject you, man!!!! You and everything you stand for!!!!!
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:24:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCK THE ESTABLISHMENT!
Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:24:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:57:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes. Can you be trapped in the body of a 21 year old Hispanic whore next week? That would be interesting.
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That's hilarious, Nator... especially coming from an Australian.
Also, Dance dance revolution is cool...
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:17:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dear sweet jesus........
Submitted by LucidCognition (user info) at 2003-09-20 19:16:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The goths are still better than the Abercrombie bitches.
Submitted by sebcharrot (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:57:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahahaha. this is fucking great
+2 for you
Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:57:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes. Can you be trapped in the body of a 21 year old Hispanic whore next week? That would be interesting.
Submitted by MAB (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is that old fashion trend still en vogue? I haven't seen many "Goths" in a while.
Submitted by russizm (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:47:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha.
I don't mind the goths as much as the 12 year olds on the dance dance revolution arcade game.
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2003-09-20 18:45:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hooray for me.
Boredatwork? hahaha