Poor Cubs (31115 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.37 on 51 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Cool Ubersite User at 2000-01-07 05:18:15 EST
20 major events that have occurred since the Chicago Cubs last laid claim to a World Series Championship: 1. Radio was invented; Cubs fans got to hear their team lose. 2.TV was invented; Cubs fans got to see their team lose. 3. Baseball added 14 teams; Cubs fans get to see and hear their team lose to more clubs. 4. George Burns celebrated his 10th, 20th, 30th, 40th, 50th, 60th,70th, 80th, 90th and 100th birthdays. 5. Haley's comet passed Earth - twice. 6. Harry Caray was born....and died. Incredible, but true. 7. The NBA, NHL and NFL were formed, and Chicago teams won championship in each league. 8. Man landed on the moon, as have several home runs given up by Cubs pitchers. 9. Sixteen U.S. presidents were elected. 10. There were 11 amendments added to the Constitution. 11.Prohibition was created and repealed. 12. The Titanic was built, set sail, sank, was discovered and became the subject of major motion pictures, the latest giving Cubs fanshope that something that finishes on the bottom can come out on top. 13. Wrigley Field was built and becomes the oldest park in the National League. 14. Flag poles were erected on Wrigley Field roof to hold all of the team's future World Series pennants. Those flag poles have since rusted and been taken down. 15. A combination of 40 Summer and Winter Olympics have been held. 16.Thirteen baseball players have won the Triple Crown; several thanked Cubs pitchers. 17. Bell-bottoms came in style, went out of style and came back in style; disco did the same. 18. The Chicago White Sox, Cleveland Indians, Boston Red Sox and FloridA Marlins have all won the World Series. 19. The Cubs played 14,153 regular-season games; they lost the majority of them. 20. Alaska, Arizona, Hawaii, Oklahoma and New Mexico were admitted to the Union.
User Reviews
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-09-17 12:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hopefully it ends this year.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-12-10 08:09:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm guessing this was an email that circulated around the chicago area.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-09-10 18:18:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
at least there was something to read on this one
Submitted by LongestPants (user info) at 2006-10-17 19:26:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-06-25 04:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Fuck the cubs
Submitted by Bushy (user info) at 2005-10-02 04:54:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i don't like baseball, but this is the first post that has been worth reading since i started at number one.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-07-10 15:55:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
26303 hits!
Submitted by Calios (user info) at 2005-05-23 01:49:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GO CUBS!! WOOO!
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-02-03 06:00:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bill Bryson, in Notes from a Big Country, talks about the Cubs. For some reason, that gets this a +2.
Submitted by TimeCop (user info) at 2004-10-23 23:27:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good compilation.
Submitted by blackflames667 (user info) at 2004-07-05 17:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This one will anger my sister in law a lot.
Submitted by dreadnaught_X (user info) at 2004-06-18 23:07:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
And the moral of the story is that baseball sucks.
Submitted by SJ at 2004-04-29 01:17:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Go Cubs!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-02-10 22:37:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cubs suck, Go White Sox!
Submitted by Lynn (user info) at 2004-01-31 20:10:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Aww... my poor little cubbies :(
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-01-31 19:55:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go White Sox! The Cubs suck.
Submitted by paul <cock.at.mouth.org> at 2003-10-31 23:18:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
haha
funny shit
Submitted by david <lzyby5255.at.212.com> at 2003-10-28 21:55:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
u know wut the sox wish they had fans and a stadium like the cub. ha the sox cant even fill up their stadium on really important games b/c they suck and no one likes a horrible team who have the stupidist announcers that nobody likes and have stupid fans. they should move the sox to like maine b/c the cubs are the most popular team in chicago and around the country. they might not always have a good team but they play better baseball and more exciting baseball than the sox. ooo wow estabn loiaza had 20 wins . big whoop. it didnt help the sox get to the world series. and how about the sox LOSING FREAKING LOSING to the worst team (DETROIT) and also the pitchers record was like 1-2110 or 0-10. now that sux. the sox are in the easiest division. o my god its the twins!!!! oh no every1 run for their lives its the royals ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cubs all the way best fans best team best stadium best beer best part of the city. SOX SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by TheChowChillaCharlie <TheChowChillaCharlie.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-10-26 08:47:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Sucks to be the Cubs. I think there's going to be some great big conspiracy and everyone's going to throw their games in 2008 so the Cubs can have a right decent 100 years of suckiness between World Series championships. Wouldn't be the first time the games were staged for dramatic effect, like when the Patriots won the Super Bowl after 9/11, very appropriate doubt the would have won if they had been called "The New England Seditionists"
Submitted by Velouria (user info) at 2003-10-21 17:00:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My world stood still for one whole minute before it sunk in that the Cubs did not advance to the World Series. After that, I couldn't control my laughter. I also might have peed myself. Carry on...
Submitted by cubs fan 2 at 2003-10-17 18:20:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i wish i had the choice of being a fan of another baseball team. i will not, however, turn my back on the club i have watched since a child. once again they let me down, in my heart i believed they had a shot, in my mind i knew they didnt. they will win again one day, the sweet just aint as sweet without the sour. as for sox fans, i dont hate their team, but they seem to hate the cubs. envy is all that it is, they wished they had the fan support, stadium, abiance, and the eternal hopefullness that we do. misery does love company.
Submitted by jeetkunetony (user info) at 2003-10-16 20:34:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THEY LOST AGAIN, HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Submitted by soxrox at 2003-10-16 15:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Halley's comet passed earth. twice."
LMAO
btw, all you whiny cubs fans are losers!
Submitted by apparentlyyoudon'tknowbaseball at 2003-10-15 20:31:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you know what's funny? computart3 not knowing a thing about baseball, then making an ass out of himself.
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2003-10-15 13:59:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Just for the record---
The fish beat the tar outta the cubs in the 8th inning. Poor cubs? Yeah. At this point I can safely dole out pitty.
(dole, bob dole, no pun intended)
Submitted by jess <jlokeinsky.at.pinecrest.edu> at 2003-10-14 22:18:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by oddzandendz (user info) at 2003-10-14 17:57:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Thirteen baseball players have won the Triple Crown; several thanked
Cubs pitchers."
ahaha....
Submitted by dbcooper (user info) at 2003-10-14 13:23:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Testicles (user info) at 2003-10-14 12:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I think people think the Cubs are so great because of their mascot. It's small and non-threatening and the colors are all american. I don't think as many people would like the Cubs if they were a fish or a sock or any of that other crap.
To be honest, I only like baseball and particularly the cubs because if gives me an excuse to party and drink afterward.
Oh and i just realized something. No one can tell that my name is pronounced 'testicleez'
D'oh
Submitted by Maira (user info) at 2003-10-14 09:15:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If God was merciful he'd make a miracle happen and let the Red Sox win the World Series so I wouldn't have to listen to people pissing and moaning about "The Curse" anymore.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-10-14 04:09:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey dumbass, the White Sox won the world series in 1917.
Submitted by TheReasonWhy (user info) at 2003-10-13 00:25:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, so uh...yeah, the BOSTON RED SOX are in the AMERICAN LEAGUE, not the NATIONAL LEAGUE...I don't even know if that was worth writing though...and also, the reason the Cubs get so much flak is that nobody cares about the White Sox, all the hype on the Cubs ability to win (or lose) year after year is only because we truly just want them to win.
Go Cubs!
Submitted by computert3 (user info) at 2003-10-12 01:34:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
13. Wrigley Field was built and becomes the oldest park in the National
League.
Ok... Boston's Fenway park is the oldest park...
And why do the Cubs get so much crap about losing so much anyway, the Chicago White Sox should get more, its been since 1908 the Cubs have won a World Series but 1906 was the last time the Sox have done it. Whats worse, (maybe), is either losing for so long without a title (the Cubs) or getting 12 postseason appearences and only winning the title once (The Atlanta Braves). Oh well some interesting facts to let you guys know I guess.
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-10-12 01:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm in Philly but still a Cubs fan.
CUBS 3-1 IN THE SERIES!
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2003-10-11 19:51:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I put this up here about four years ago before ubersite had logins. I got it as an email forward from a friend forwarded from a friend forwarded from a friend etc. I have no idea who originally compiled the list and would gladly give credit to the author if I could identify one.
Things like this propagate around the web so much that it's impossible to find the original source. However, that in no way makes it any less entertaining.
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-10-11 12:41:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have my Cubs hat on today.
GO CUBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2003-10-10 15:57:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You did not write this.
but anyway, this is my facorite one:
"14. Flag poles were erected on Wrigley Field roof to hold all of the
team's future World Series pennants. Those flag poles have since rusted
and been taken down."
Submitted by daidoji (user info) at 2003-10-10 13:37:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 Just because Bob Dole wrote that last comment.
It is Bob Dole right?
Man I love that guy.
but yes i do think this was a stolen article having seen something like it before.
Submitted by Bob Dole <bobdole.at.rep.gov> at 2003-10-10 10:37:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not a bad post, very funny, so I spare the negative rate.
However-
I'm a die hard Marlins fan, born and raised in the "What the hell is a chad?" state of Florida. Been with the fish since their first game in 1993 and when we won the big one in 1997.
But I do give respect where it is earned- Sosa hits like a train... and Alou, (although a FORMER MARLIN) made one hell of a catch in game 1. And yeah, the cubs kinda did beat my poor fish into chum 2 nights ago. Great pitching. But thats alright, we'll see who brings it in game 5.
Submitted by prezuiwf (user info) at 2003-10-10 06:25:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Way to steal someone else's work without credit.
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2003-10-10 03:00:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Submitted by Agent_FUBAR (user info) at 2003-06-02 11:17:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
baseball is a only slightly more interesting version of cricket, making it still very very boring"
My ass it is, Cricket is a million times more intresting than baseball, I mean on average you get like scores of 9 or 10 right? That's a fucking soccer score, bullshit game. 'American's favourite pass time' that figures.
Submitted by moose74 (user info) at 2003-10-09 21:11:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It is written that when the little bears from the windy town capture the pennant, the end of the world is upon us. At least, that's what they said on SNL. Lord I hope they weren't right.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-10-09 19:55:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Cool Ubersite User is bart.
DUH!
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2003-10-09 19:50:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a sign of the apocolypse. The Cubs are well on the way to the World Series. Being a major Cubs fan, (I'm from Detroit... not much to root for around here unless you like figure skating with sticks) I am ecstatic and overjoyed that they have a legitamite shot at the title. But at the same time.. this post just helps me realize that the end of the world is near.
Heed my warnings... go buy bottled water and canned goods. THE END IS NEAR!
Submitted by Princess_Bee (user info) at 2003-10-05 02:07:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Cal Ripkin Jr. will always be my first love. I wonder how many times the Orioles kicked their ass... Something nice to think about...
Submitted by Chad_Sexington (user info) at 2003-10-05 01:54:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool Ubersite User was, by what I have seen, the first poster to Ubersite, creating the first six posts until Bart posted "This is the greatest site I've ever seen" (http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=945339185325425118).
Damn, I'm smart.
Submitted by atz (user info) at 2003-10-05 01:45:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who the hell is "Cool Ubersite User"?
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2003-10-05 01:39:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Scary thought: This years world series could be the Cubs and the Red Sox.
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAAHAHHHA
And maybe Jessica Alba will knock on my door looking for an orgasm.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2003-09-24 13:15:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for Cleveland winning one.
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2003-09-24 13:06:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by senseiofmattitudev1 (user info) at 2003-08-26 03:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I only love this because I am a St. Louis Cardinals fan... GO CARDS!! WOO!!!
(the Cubs suck, too)
Submitted by Rivers_Liebig (user info) at 2003-08-19 14:48:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
CUBBIES! CUBBIES!
Submitted by kinney69 (user info) at 2003-08-08 00:47:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Marvelous, simply marvelous
Submitted by Rivers_Liebig (user info) at 2003-07-21 15:28:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn funny. Scarily true. Mark Prior and Kerry Wood shalt be the saviours that are required however. You'll see.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-07-20 22:20:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2003-06-02 14:00:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2003-06-02 11:45:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And everyone thought the Mets were bad...
Submitted by Agent_FUBAR (user info) at 2003-06-02 11:17:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
baseball is a only slightly more interesting version of cricket, making it still very very boring
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-05-18 16:21:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-05-16 11:05:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
www.efmovie.com
Submitted by maurine at 2003-04-27 08:59:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
baseball sucks
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-04-17 10:09:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm from Philly, but I'm a Cubs fan because they always suck ass. Plus, I like Sammy Sosa and Wrigley. Chitown is a fun city.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-03-12 00:32:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Mike <reelmt.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-01-15 11:39:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That's why I'm a Chicago White Sox fan and always will be! GO SOX!
Submitted by Dumbass at 2002-07-12 14:59:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Always have been and always will be a Cub fan...Go cubbies!
Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-04-05 10:16:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by king b <kingb36kb.at.hotmail.com> at 2002-01-06 17:33:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Which proves once and for all, The Cubs suck, always have always will!!!!!