Movie Theatre employees can't subtract 82 from 99 (814 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.6 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Alex Joehl <alex_joehl.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2003-10-18 22:09:41 EDT
This is in light of the following post, and some of its replies:
http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=1066488823640024884
This is kind of long...if you only read one part, at least read the first story. They're all stories about me getting carded.
My friend and I used to go get hammered every weekend, and he drove. One day I decided that I wanted to drive, so I'd stay sober. You see, I'd had a serious accident a few months earlier so I was on driving probation and I hadn't driven since that accident. So I was looking forward to that Saturday.
I was 18 at the time (legal limit in British Columbi is 19), however we had found a beer and wine store that sold booze to us without carding us. So we always went there. I went in, since I was the more ballsy of the two of us, and bought him a six-pack of kokanee or something like that.
We met up with some other friends later that night and one of them wanted me to go buy his girlfriend some beer. So, again, since I was the only one among us with any testicular fortitude, I went in. As I walked towards the store, I noticed a police cruiser in the parking lot. My first thought (which is usually the way to go) was to forget it, and leave. But instead, being a stupid 18 year old, I thought that the officer would assume that I wasn't stupid enough to buy beer illegally with him in the parking lot. I bought my second six-pack of the night, and walked towards the car and put it in the back seat.
Just then ANOTHER friend pulls around in his truck. He tells me to get him a six pack, reminding me of 'all the times' he bought for me (once, bastard.). So, I went back in, this time with his debti card, and bought my 3rd six pack of the night, second in like 3 minutes, from the same teller.
I walked back to the car, only to see my drunk-ass friend pissing in the bush. What a dumbass. As I brought the beer back and put it in the back seat, the cop car T-bones us into our parking space and turns on the lights. FUCK.
First question: Where's the beer?
"In the back seat." i said. Apparantly it has to be in the trunk. Being a stupid minor, I did not know this.
Second question: Who old are you?
"18"
Third question: What did you use to buy?
"Nothing. He didn't ID me."
Well, I was instructed to wait there. He goes into the store, brings the dumbass teller from the beer store into his car for like 5 minutes, then walks him back to the store. He comes to me and says "You just cost a guy his job. How do you feel about that?" I was speechless. Anyway, he brought me into the back of the car and questioned me...I have no idea what he was asking...All i could think of is that I'd lose my licence since I was on probation. It would have been $100 for each minor in the car (4 of us).
In the end he gave us a speech about how he was young once and about getting parents to buy beer for us if we REALLY want it that bad. He watched us pour out all the beer and left, without giving me a ticket. Thank God.
My dumbass friend, same one who was pissing in the bush, saved one beer in his pocket.
The year is 1999. The new hit movie was South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut. I was 17 at the time and wanted to go see it. It was R-rated, which (in Canada anyway) means that you have to be 18, or if you're not, have a 19 year old with you in the theatre.
I went to see it with my brother, 13, and his friend, 14 (who looked about 12 at the oldest). My mom came with us to buy the tickets, so there would be no hassle, and then she went to see Big Daddy. Pretty excited, the three of us walked towards the theatre, tickets in hand, only to see that not one, but three employees were standing at the theatre's doors enforcing the age-minimum.
"You know that you have to be 19 to see this movie, right?" a tall, lanky, pimple-faced guy says to me.
"Yeah," I sheepishly reply.
"Do you have some ID?"
I reached into my wallet to grab my driver's licence. He looks at it for a few seconds, flips it over, looks at the back, flips it over again, staring at my ID. He hands it back to me and says "Ok. Enjoy the movie." I couldn't believe it. I look at my brother, holding back laughter, and walk into the theatre. What a dumbass guy. He couldn't even subtract 82 (my year of birth) from 99. What do they teach kids in the public high school system? I guess I was lucky to go to a private school. The movie was everything that I expected.
Another time I nearly pulled this off was when I was 18 trying to buy some beer. I walk into the cold beer and wine store, grab a 12-pack of beer (either Kokanee or Blue...I forget) and plopped it on the counter. She asks me, naturally, for ID. She looks at my license for about 10-15 seconds. And says "Is March 6th already old enough?" I obviously reply with a simple "yeah." She goes into the back room to talk to the shelf-stocker. She comes back laughing.
"You're only 18!" she exclaims.
"I know."
"You have to be 19 in B.C." (British Columbia for all you non-Canadians.)
I crack a smile, knowing I was SO close to scoring some beer. I walk away, leaving the booze on the counter.
I went to see the movie Baby Boy at the theatre. I don't remember who old I was, or why I went to see it, but I was old enough for the movie. Again, I went with my brother. The girl at the ticket window asked for ID. I couldn't believe it. Of course I flashed my licence and she let us go. But seriously, they should have been INVITING minors to go see that stupid movie, since no one with any maturity would have enjoyed it. One of only three or four movies that I regret going to the theatre to see.
User Reviews
Submitted by InSaNeSna1L (user info) at 2003-11-24 02:04:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
thank god for facial hair....
since i was 18 i have been able to go anywhere or buy anything without ID....my friends are taller than me and they always get checked, but alas, no facial hair for them :)
Submitted by jimbobjoe (user info) at 2003-10-19 19:03:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2003-10-19 18:40:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Blame Canada!
Submitted by prezuiwf (user info) at 2003-10-19 14:22:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I used to work at a movie theater.
Bad karma for you.
Submitted by UrbaneMischief (user info) at 2003-10-18 22:21:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
until i turned 21, I would go to bars and clubs and hand whoever my oldest sister's id.
My oldest sister is adopted, she is 26 and asian.
I was probably 17, white as they come with red hair.
i was never once told i couldn't drink.
i love having cleavage