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Poems Or, Why war is stupid (887 hits)

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Rating: -1.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)

Submitted by <wingswest26.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2003-11-01 06:56:06 EST

Everyday at the school I attend, either a teacher or a student reads a poem. This poem, by Jack Handey, was the one read on Halloween.

If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.

User Reviews

Submitted by Alan Bane <ambforjc.at.aol.com> at 2004-10-07 19:44:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Hi,

I've just written a book on this very topic. Here's the online versions web address:
Why It's Right Not To Fight
http://hometown.aol.com/ambforjc/Whyindex.html

Submitted by ClaudiaShort <twinklestarprincess.at.hotmail.co> at 2003-11-12 12:50:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Thanks for your comment asshole.......go fuck yourself!

Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2003-11-02 18:16:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Come you masters of war
You that build all the guns
You that build the death planes
You that build the big bombs
You that hide behind walls
You that hide behind desks
I just want you to know
I can see through your masks

You that never done nothin'
But build to destroy
You play with my world
Like it's your little toy
You put a gun in my hand
And you hide from my eyes
And you turn and run farther
When the fast bullets fly

Like Judas of old
You lie and deceive
A world war can be won
You want me to believe
But I see through your eyes
And I see through your brain
Like I see through the water
That runs down my drain

You fasten the triggers
For the others to fire
Then you set back and watch
When the death count gets higher
You hide in your mansion
As young people's blood
Flows out of their bodies
And is buried in the mud

You've thrown the worst fear
That can ever be hurled
Fear to bring children
Into the world
For threatening my baby
Unborn and unnamed
You ain't worth the blood
That runs in your veins

How much do I know
To talk out of turn
You might say that I'm young
You might say I'm unlearned
But there's one thing I know
Though I'm younger than you
Even Jesus would never
Forgive what you do

Let me ask you one question
Is your money that good
Will it buy you forgiveness
Do you think that it could
I think you will find
When your death takes its toll
All the money you made
Will never buy back your soul

And I hope that you die
And your death'll come soon
I will follow your casket
In the pale afternoon
And I'll watch while you're lowered
Down to your deathbed
And I'll stand o'er your grave
'Til I'm sure that you're dead

Bob Dylan - Masters of War

Oh my name it is nothin'
My age it means less
The country I come from
Is called the Midwest
I's taught and brought up there
The laws to abide
And that land that I live in
Has God on its side.

Oh the history books tell it
They tell it so well
The cavalries charged
The Indians fell
The cavalries charged
The Indians died
Oh the country was young
With God on its side.

Oh the Spanish-American
War had its day
And the Civil War too
Was soon laid away
And the names of the heroes
I's made to memorize
With guns in their hands
And God on their side.

Oh the First World War, boys
It closed out its fate
The reason for fighting
I never got straight
But I learned to accept it
Accept it with pride
For you don't count the dead
When God's on your side.

When the Second World War
Came to an end
We forgave the Germans
And we were friends
Though they murdered six million
In the ovens they fried
The Germans now too
Have God on their side.

I've learned to hate Russians
All through my whole life
If another war starts
It's them we must fight
To hate them and fear them
To run and to hide
And accept it all bravely
With God on my side.

But now we got weapons
Of the chemical dust
If fire them we're forced to
Then fire them we must
One push of the button
And a shot the world wide
And you never ask questions
When God's on your side.

In a many dark hour
I've been thinkin' about this
That Jesus Christ
Was betrayed by a kiss
But I can't think for you
You'll have to decide
Whether Judas Iscariot
Had God on his side.

So now as I'm leavin'
I'm weary as Hell
The confusion I'm feelin'
Ain't no tongue can tell
The words fill my head
And fall to the floor
If God's on our side
He'll stop the next war.

Bob Dylan - With God on Our Side

Submitted by NickTheDivine (user info) at 2003-11-02 17:52:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Eh, I got a kick out of it, and thought a few people would too. Good job being a fucking prick though.

Submitted by Party03 (user info) at 2003-11-01 11:57:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Roses are red,
Violets are blue
War sucks ass
and this post does too.

Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2003-11-01 11:44:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

"War is stupid, war is bad,
War loks ugly on tv
This I read on some dumb site
and the sentiment fits me"

Just like turkeys in a death farm
just like cows on bonemeal fed
you believe when someone tells you
that you're better red then dead?

you believe that 'war is stoopid'
knowing not what freedom means
you believe that war is bad,
without war, who freedom wins?

What of value comes to be
without struggle, blood & pain?
What of value? even you?
Who's lobotomized your brain?

Fuck you, moron, fuck you, brainless
without blood you don't exist
empty skulled & hollow forbrained,
ingrown, worthless anal cyst.

Submitted by Fleet_Marshall_Badass (user info) at 2003-11-01 11:27:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

First off, there were no poems. Second, the pumpkin thing is old and tired, and if it was meant to be a poem, it was totally shit. Third, war is great! It gives me a job! For more on how great war is, check this out:

http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=106734351629943504

Badass.