Strange Holidays and Drinking (5161 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1 on 3 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bob Dole <robotgod80.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2003-11-03 11:12:12 EST
We have all sorts of strange holidays here in the states. A lot of it I don't quite understand. Every year it's the same thing. These kids, dressed in the strangest of things, come to my door, and scream something about tricks, and treats- I don't know. I hardly pay attention. And just like the past years they won't go away, it seems they're waiting for something. So I figured maybe they're bored. Maybe they want me to play with them. Well, since I'm too busy to go out and play, and these looked like nice kids, I gave them each one of my old hand gernades. See, thats the problem with kids today. They never have anything to play with. But in hindsight, maybe I shouln't have given the kids the ones that say "Pull pin for candy" written across them. The point of the exercise? Drink, stay up late, egg passing cars, and party at the expense of people who come to your door.
But yet another perplexing time of year; the "blow shit up day". Apparently on or about this day we came to the conclusion that the country (to some degree as we know it now) was liberated from our original homeland. To mark this event, and commerate it to the thousands who died in the wars, and the destruction of many of our cities, and the losses we suffered in attaining our freedom- we blow shit up. Collectivelly we pour MILLIONS od dollars into FOREGIN PRODUCED fireworks, and blow them up for hours on end. The point of the exercise? Drink, stay up late, and party and blow shit up without too much fear of the cops giving you a hard time.
It gets better yet- another time of year, apparently not too long after the whole "dressing up and wandering the neighborhood" thing passes... millions of Americans go out, and buy, yes, purchase, a dying tree. They drag this thing into their homes and cover it in metal and glass and lights, in so that they may enjoy watching the tree dying slowly until Janurary, when the trees are dragged to the curb and discarded. The point of the exercise? Drink, stay up late, and party with friends and relatives you wouldn't otherwise spend time with.
Bu alas, there is one more holiday that makes less than perfect sense. Just about the same time the trees are being discarded we find one more strange thing to do before the year is over. On a predetermined day, which, due to daylight savings time and the leap years, is so horribally innaccurate, we celebrate midnight of that day. This is to signify that we have gone through all 365 days (optional on leapyears) of our no-so-accurate calandar, and we are now going to start over at the beginning of the calandar all over again. The point of the exercise? Drink, stay up late, and party. Not like we need an excuse.
Do i see a trend here?
(Giftwrap fragment is from tshirthell.com)
User Reviews
Submitted by TempermentalTypist (user info) at 2007-02-07 13:19:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i didnt know we neded a holiday to drink
Submitted by xLisaCatx (user info) at 2003-11-03 11:25:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't understand the trend either. Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Birthdays are all good venues for partying, but why do I always find myself having the most fun on off holidays such as Halloween?
I don't know, but since this past weekend, Jack and Captain Morgan are no longer in my black book of friends to call up for a good time. *gags*
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2003-11-03 11:22:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Drink, stay up late, and party and blow shit up without too much fear of the cops giving you a hard time.
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Hard Time? I guess you have never been to chinatown in NYC the week before the 4th. Cops took from me a gross of M-80s. The bastards!