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Don't Lie To Me! (632 hits)

Category: Business & Financial

Rating: 0 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by pimpbuster (View user info) at 2003-11-10 13:40:38 EST


Because I will find out.

Here's a few tips on being a good liar that few people seem to understand. But first I have to give a little backstory.

I seem to have become a black hole for information, well I don't know if that is the best way to describe it but, but most of my friends have a tendency to tell me what's on their minds. Among my circle of friends, I happen to have a pretty good idea of what's going on from both seeing with my own two eyes and from everyone telling me what I missed. In other words, if something happened, I know about it in explicit detail.

Nearly everyone I know knows this. But they continue to deny events that I witnessed with my own two eyes!

Most recent event, I set a buddy of mine up with a girl I knew from school. They hit it off pretty well, really well actually. Anyway they went at it for a couple weeks then the shit hit the fan. The last time they got together, he met her at her place, then drove her to her hometown to party, to which she left him hanging and was later spotted hanging on a bunch of other guys. End of that "friends with benefits" package.

The previous week she went home and went out for some hardcore partying. She wound up going to an after party where a bunch of people were snorting coke. She had some too, being the partier she is. Of course she didn't tell me that part, she denied doing any of it.

How do I know?

Lesson # 1: NEVER discuss "secret" information in front of someone who you think is asleep.

While she thought my friend was passed out on the couch, she was telling one of her friends about all the coke she did the previous week.

So the following week after their breakup, she left her cd's in my friend's truck after their weekend excursion and "had to have them back" for her trip home on the coming weekend. (like she would die if she didn't have her music for a little bit, it was all shit anyway) So me and my buddy meet her halfway to give her her stuff back, and she takes it and jets. It was a "what the fuck?" moment. The next day I get this email from her about how "rude and shady" we were, I thought we were doing more than our share by meeting her half way and not making her come all the way to get her cd's. So I reply to it and inform her how badly she fucked things up with my friend, and how she really owes him an apology for taking him way out and then ditching him.

Lesson #2: NEVER lie to someone when they can find out very easily that you're lying to them.

She told me later in the week that she called and apologised, but she didn't. Duh! Did she seriously think that I wouldn't ask my friend if she called? I asked him a day later if she called and found out the truth.

Lesson #3: Don't lie when you don't have to.

I don't really care what other people do with their lives, I'm not everyone's dad. This girl has no reason to lie to me. I'm not fucking this girl, I don't even want to.

She could have told me she did a few lines, she could have not said anything about making any calls, and I wouldn't have grilled her too much but the thing would be over and settled. Instead she lied to me and I found out causing me to lose a lot of respect for her.

Moral? If you're going to lie, make sure you do it right!

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User Reviews


Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-11-11 10:19:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

good points

Submitted by pimpbuster (user info) at 2003-11-11 09:56:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Oh I love it when you guys miss the point!

Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2003-11-10 21:55:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2003-11-10 14:03:00 (#)
Ranking: 2

i am the king of liars
------------------------------------

I agree. :P

Submitted by IndianOcean (user info) at 2003-11-10 21:49:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

NO fuckin shit.....

Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2003-11-10 21:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

You sanctimonious bastard. She lies, he lies, you lie, we all lie. boo hoo
Get a fucking life.

Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2003-11-10 20:01:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -1

You are such a fucking arsehat, how do you know that she didn't call, or that she did coke? Through the same jaded guy that she ditched right. Surely you see how fucking stupid it is to base your opinions on something said by a pissed off ex who was recently ditched.

Submitted by pimpbuster (user info) at 2003-11-10 15:44:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I just like calling people on their shit when I know they're wrong. That whiteface expression that screams "holy shit I'm fucked" is so worth it sometimes. The funny thing is I really don't care but nobody ever seems to know that. I'm just tired of people who can't be straight up with their own actions.

Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2003-11-10 14:46:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I think the better a liar you are.. the easier it is to detect someone not so skilled.

Submitted by El_Guapo (user info) at 2003-11-10 14:42:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

"Oh, honey, I didn't get drunk, I just went to a strange fantasy world.

-- Homer Simpson
El Viaje Misterioso De Nuestro Jomer"


actually the moral should be:

If you feel like you need to lie about doing something, you probably shouldn't have done it.

Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2003-11-10 14:03:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

i am the king of liars, and therefore i am really fucking good at picking up on other people lying to me.

Submitted by sam_el (user info) at 2003-11-10 14:02:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Dude, I neglected to read who posted this and I thought you were a girl.

Another tip on lying: Mix reality with the lie. It's harder to get caught if you can actually prove some of what you say. Plus, it's easier to keep track of things.

Oh, Lying is wrong!

Submitted by Anjie (user info) at 2003-11-10 13:50:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Hmmmmm...boring.


I'll get a bunch of monkeys, dress 'em up, and make 'em reenact the Civil
War! Heh, heh, heh!

-- Homer Simpson
Homer the Great