Santa sucks. Fuck Santa. (60179 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.54 on 73 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by sean fogy <fogarty.at.msa.attmil.ne.jp> (View user info) at 2003-11-23 01:48:30 EST
A few hours before school was let out for our winter break my first grade teacher, Mrs. Barnhouse, was going over some geography and showed us where the North Pole was located. She showed us the path Santa would be taking to get to our hometown, milage from his home as well as approximate travel time. Very useful information, I think... Since I was forced to sit in the very front row because I talked too much, she often picked on me to answer her questions. She turned around and asked me what I was going to get from Santa this year with a sarcastic chuckle.
"Nothing."
"Well why's that Sean? Youre not even going to get any coal?"
"No, because Santa hates me, and Im going to kill that fucker before he can deliver anything this year."
Most of the class let out a synchronized gasp in awe, while others quietly snickered. Mrs. Barnhouse's eyes got as big as silver dollars as her jaw hit the floor. Needless to say, I spent the rest of the day in the office having a closed circut conference with the counslers and my father. As hard as they tried and as much as they tightened the rope around my neck, they never got a single solitary peep out of me. The bamboo shoots under my fingernails didnt even phase me. I wasnt going to give in. Not when I was this close.
I was led into believing that a fat man in a red suit spent the night before Christmas travelling around the globe delivering presents to all little boys and girls. But no. I never got shit from that fat ass bastard. I got presents from everyone else, even from my mother who has hated me since birth. But nothing from Santa. Not even coal. Apparantly his trusty elves added me to his list as Jewish, so that pretty much fucked me in the end, and thats why I was going to get my revenge. A week prior, when the class was sending out wish lists to Santa like the greedy little bastards they are, I sent a present to him along with my letter. Merry Christmas you fat fuck! Hope you like Anthrax!
Apparantly he doesnt open them personally, because a few days later I saw him on TV wishing the planet a wonderful holiday ho ho ho. With that in mind, I would be forced to take a more direct route. When I got out of school for winter break, I called up my Uncle Jeb who just got out of prison and told him my plan. I guess he thought it was cute that I wanted to kill Santa and said that he would help me out, so he called up one of his Vietnam buddies and got a hold of a helicopter. That night I got my dad into letting me "stay the night over at a friends", and around eight I met Uncle Jeb right down the street from my house.
We made it to the helicopter pad and took off for the North Pole. It was a long flight but we finally made it there after about 12 hours. We landed about a half mile from Santas kingdom to be discrete, so I put on my little booties and we trekked the rest of the way. When we made it to the perimeter of his stronghold, security was pretty tight. Along with his Elite Elf Patrol (EEP), there were attack sled dogs and search lights scanning the grounds for intruders. Had someone led him on to our attack? We crouched behind a snowbank to lock and load. Jeb had and AK-47, a 9mm side arm and an old survival knife for himself, and handed me two Supersoakers filled with Clorox bleach / ammonia mix. I also had a one foot long candy cane that I had taken the liberty of grinding down to a razor sharp point on the flight over. He took a shot of whiskey from a flask, tied his Rambo bandanna around his forehead and said...
"Whatever you do... dont tell your dad."
On the count of three we busted around the bank and unleashed hell on the guards. Jeb wasted most of the EEP while I squirted the attack dogs in the eyes with bleach rendering them blind in excruciating pain. We had broken through the gates and deciphered the digital scramble lock on the front door. When we entered the hallway, he pulled out his map of Santa's place that he downloaded from the Department of Defense Secure BBS and navigated through the mansion undetected. We passed by the workshop, and I peered around the corner to view the spectacle of the present assembly line. Billions and billions of toys were being constructed, packed and wrapped in their shiny paper with bows of magnificat colors and sparkle. As I stared in wonder, I thought about all the kids that I was going to make very sad this year, but then thought about the fact that not one of those presents were for me. This made my blood boil and renewed my hatred for the fat fuck.
As we were getting ready to venture on, I saw a lone elf carrying a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a tall frosty glass of milk. I knew where this was going, and lept from the shadows onto the elf and knocked him out cold with a punch to the throat. I stripped him of his green and red garb, put it on along with his little pointy shoes, and picked up the meal that he was going to deliver to Santa. I gave a quick nod to Jeb and made my way down the hall to his lair. As I placed my hand on the doorknob to his room, I went over the plan one more time in my head. I entered his bedroom to see him sitting at his desk studying The List. He turned to greet me as I placed his meal on the desk.
"Thank you very much, my little friend!", he said as he patted me on the head.
"No.. Thank you, you fat fucking piece of shit."
Before he could even say another word I grabbed my candy cane, lept up and buried it deep in his temple. He fell to the floor with a large crash that shook the entire house. I knew that it would attract more of his guardians, so I gave the candy cane one more swift kick for good measure and quickly jumped out the window to meet Jeb. We tossed a few flaming bottles of everclear into the house, watched the worker elves dragging their burning carcasses out of the flaming building and shot each one as they pleaded for mercy. As we took off in the chopper, I had an overwhelming sense of satisfaction and a renewed love for the Christmas Spirit as I watched Santas Workshop become nothing but a pile of ash.
User Reviews
Submitted by konohasaiyajin (user info) at 2007-01-01 20:54:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that is great.
I'd give you higher than a +2 for your sense of accomplishment if I could
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-06-01 12:39:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nominated for best ever
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88623
Submitted by Creamy_Goodbar (user info) at 2005-11-29 22:39:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for taking that red clothed bastard down a notch.
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2005-11-29 22:26:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
boy-ya!
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2005-11-29 22:26:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
boom!
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2005-11-29 22:26:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Best I've read in a month. 3 +2's.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-11-29 22:09:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2005-09-26 09:08:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
badass
Submitted by Santa_Claus_ (user info) at 2005-05-11 12:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I SURVIVED, BITCH!
Submitted by ljgmlg2 (user info) at 2005-01-24 07:22:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-22 23:02:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-01-31 19:50:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
That kicked so much ass. Jolly bowl of jelly my ass. I'd like to disembowel that stupid son of a bitch.
***
Uberhistory.
My first comment ever on Ubersite as a registered user.
Submitted by MoneyG (user info) at 2004-12-22 22:51:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-20 19:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2004-12-20 19:19:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-25 02:50:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
-2 FoR TRYING TO PASS THIS OFF AS TRUE!
-------------------------------------------------
AHAHAHAHAHA That was me!
Submitted by Claire <claire_fallen_5.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-08-04 19:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i 4gh this was pretty good actually i cnt undastand the people that said it was CRAP ent got a clue. it seems like summit tht shud b in south park!!!!!!!!!!!1
Submitted by house <house.at.word.com> at 2004-06-03 08:41:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
thought it might be funny, but it really wasnt. just an excuse to cuss and be violent which can be entertaining sometimes but i dont think much thought was put into this.
Submitted by Kichigai (user info) at 2004-04-29 05:54:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-21 05:46:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah Fuck Santa!!! I never did get that Barbie dream house you fuckwad.
Submitted by roxxxy (user info) at 2004-04-07 16:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
While reading this...i thought it was interesting how my toolbar came up with things for me to click on like
'ass fucking'
'chicks with dicks'
'fuck picture'
'big ass'
but, good story anyways
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-03-27 11:36:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
complete piss. By entering a site that states, bored at work, i felt that at the very least the site would offer respite, and aleviate me of my boredom,, how wrong was i. the most random dross i have ever read. completely unfunny, and pieced together like a spastic trying to negociate a level 1 jigsaw puzzle. Great effort..... not
Submitted by Supremebeing (user info) at 2004-03-23 01:58:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good and original I like it!
Submitted by SausageKing (user info) at 2004-03-05 15:01:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very funny
Submitted by ravena (user info) at 2004-03-03 06:45:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Santa is just waiting to fuck our children in the ass when they go to sleep. How do I know this? Because only gay men wear tight red velvet pants. And honestly, how fucked up is it to tell your kids that some random dude is going to come into the house at night and arbitrarily decide whether or not they're going to be rewarded for their acts during the year? That's a little creepy, don't you think? He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you're awake? So is Santa watching me in the shower? Is Santa jacking off while I'm getting undressed? The answer is YES. Therefore, Santa Claus should be destroyed, and I'm glad I'm a Jew. The end.
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2004-02-04 17:58:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this was the most unfunny pile of shit i've ever read. it was written with a second grade mindset and what's worse...it's long as hell. whoever thought this was funny is dumber than a brick of shit. and as for anyone who "laughed out loud" at this, you are the textbook definition of a dipshit.
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2004-02-04 17:57:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this was the most unfunny pile of shit i've ever read. it was written with a second grade mindset and what's worse...it's long as hell. whoever thought this was funny is dumber than a brick of shit. and as for anyone who "laughed out loud" at this, you are the textbook definition of a dipshit.
Submitted by TonyMontana (user info) at 2004-02-04 17:57:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this was the most unfunny pile of shit i've ever read. it was written with a second grade mindset and what's worse...it's long as hell. whoever thought this was funny is dumber than a brick of shit. and as for anyone who "laughed out loud" at this, you are the textbook definition of a dipshit.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-01-31 19:50:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That kicked so much ass. Jolly bowl of jelly my ass. I'd like to disembowel that stupid son of a bitch.
Submitted by jt at 2004-01-29 17:19:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
learn how to write. then learn how to be funny. then learn how to spell.
after you do these three things, write a story. but don't ever publish in public again.
you suck.
Submitted by UberUser (user info) at 2003-12-28 16:16:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
The picture is funny.
Submitted by Me at 2003-12-28 16:03:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you dirty bitch I love Santa He gave me a free hit in the ass. It was great. Santa has the bigggest dick and he got so deep in me. Next year santa says since im gonna be 8 i can jerk him off and thats all I need for Christmas
Submitted by Deisangua (user info) at 2003-12-23 11:16:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2003-12-23 11:06:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Some twisted shit. I dig it.
Submitted by Ryan at 2003-12-23 10:56:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That was... really really weird...
Submitted by Rachel at 2003-12-21 20:40:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Loved it! Santa is creepy.
Submitted by coconutGRL (user info) at 2003-12-21 02:03:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Man dude. . I so totally agree with you. . . telling a KID that santa an anogram for SATAN is totally unmoral. . .sooner or later that young child will grow up. .and maybe around his/her 8th year. . .they find out you were lying. . and it screws them up. . .and then next thing you know you want them to believe in God. . . PeaCE
Submitted by Diane at 2003-12-20 09:36:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I Agree, Christmas Sucks Shit!
Submitted by Bellae at 2003-12-20 04:18:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bah Humbug!
Submitted by Bob Bank at 2003-12-19 14:05:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hell yes. The holiday cheer pisses me off. my garbage doesn't get picked up, I can't buy non-holiday food, and my family always makes me wear that stupid hat. Queen Bea wishes she had thought of it, skip all the santa lovers, he's dead in hell. Plus you burned his corpse, which insures he won't be coming back as zombiesanta.
Submitted by larz <sincer.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-12-18 13:23:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn fine job, boys
Submitted by James Bond <jbond.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-12-18 13:22:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Would have rated 10, but i guess it doesn't go that high
Submitted by QueenBea (user info) at 2003-12-18 02:19:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Sounded like something a 7th grader would write at an attempt at being funny to all this friends. This was stupid.
Queen
Submitted by Lisa <smiller.at.hotmail.com.au> at 2003-12-17 21:22:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Given that I entered the 'bored' site I assumed that some attempt would be made to relieve some of that boredom. I was wrong. Lame.
Submitted by Disguised <anon.at.anon.com> at 2003-12-15 23:01:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's not that cool... Come on. Grow up...
Submitted by Moojii <moojii.at.comcast.net.removethist> at 2003-12-15 08:42:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Loved it. I wrote a similar story when I was in the 4th grade. BTW, seeing how the super-soakers are strong enough to hold water at a few pounds of pressure, I think they could hold the chlorine/ammonia mixture, just add them together one at a time into the reservoir and then seal it tight. I am not sure about the heat and pressure created by the reaction of gas and ammonia, but if you sprayed the gun downwind of you and kept the pressure under control i think it would work for a few minutes, maybe more. I will have to check this out.
Submitted by phiz at 2003-12-14 03:34:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
reminds me of stewey from the family guy.
Submitted by ReverendSteveO (user info) at 2003-12-12 18:49:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For being some sort of morbidly obese omnipresent entity, he sure got his ass smoked really quick. Quality.
Submitted by BadassAlex (user info) at 2003-12-10 21:55:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
lol, knocked the elf out cold with a punch to the throat. worthy.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2003-12-08 19:51:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome, in the true sense of the word.
Submitted by JahstaCat (user info) at 2003-12-07 22:32:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Merry Christmas
JahstaCat
Submitted by lake_acid (user info) at 2003-12-06 19:22:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I truly hope that you never raise kids. because every kid deserves to believe in santa while they r growing up! you are sick and disturbing
Submitted by paul <cock.at.mouth.org> at 2003-12-02 20:12:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i didnt even read the article, i just think santa is a punk-ass bitch
p.s. im keepin my a.k. under my pillow christmas eve
im ready for ya motherfucker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2003-12-02 16:25:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
i had to -1 it, simply because you didnt do enough research. i refer, of course, to the bit about
"Supersoakers filled with Clorox bleach / ammonia mix."
bleach and ammonia create chlorine gas, which is, sadly, fatal to humans (as well as most other animals). a mixture would have killed both you and your uncle before you landed. the story itself was good, but that error ruined the +1 or 2 i was intending to give you. i am aware that i am an anal retentive bitch, but i dont care.
Submitted by Amish_Amos (user info) at 2003-12-02 11:32:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a tale for all the Santa-haters.
http://www.canada.com/montreal/story.asp?id=5ACBC72E-6C58-440C-9D02-AD9131F0ECBB
Submitted by shadowz <Villian_vicious.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-12-01 21:03:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is so funny even tho santa dont exsist its still funny to hear a kid do that no matter what happens in life you always find a way to resolve your problems.:P
Submitted by matt <mdodge.at.hotmail.com> at 2003-12-01 20:38:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ever played that video game for PS2 called Extinction?! They should make a video game from your story. I feel moved man. You made me laugh, cry, and feel they story LOL!!!! If you ever decide to go after the Easter bunny gimmie a call!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Niklas at 2003-12-01 11:57:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
WHy? why kill santa? He doesn't exist...
Thats like killing the tooth fairy or scooby doo or the olsen twins...
Submitted by mgstearate <mgstearate.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-12-01 01:20:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I really feel bad for you, santa rocks!! the minus one is for whoever raised you :(
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2003-12-01 01:12:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great story, man! I love anybody who believes in free speech,
especially the fantasy of slaughtering anyone you want!
I fucking hate Christmas...I have a broken home, so that doesn't help,
really. Did you know Christmas is the holiday with the most amount of
suicides? Why is that? Because if you aren't happy on Xmas, you might
as well kill yourself, because that's the only thing you CAN do. It's a
fucking prozac holiday. It should be changed to...fuck I don't know. Oh!
They should replace each special Xmas day with a winter battle comemmoration.
Christmas Eve will be "Battle of the Bulge" day. And Christmas day will be...
you guys figure it out, im out.
Submitted by Pam at 2003-12-01 00:52:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to pray for you. It must be awful being so unhappy.
Submitted by Kyle <draculahunter.at.yahoo.com> at 2003-11-29 15:21:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
indeed!
Submitted by rmuser (user info) at 2003-11-29 10:48:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Superb.
Submitted by Zaatxe <zaatxe.at.yahoo.com.br> at 2003-11-28 06:00:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Man, that sounds like a Capcom's videogame plot! Well, take this as a compliment, I love Capcom's videogames!
Submitted by MOssiah (user info) at 2003-11-28 02:50:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Santa is a Yes man.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-11-27 12:25:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=1059983720127926437
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2003-11-25 16:11:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
classic
Submitted by Natophelia (user info) at 2003-11-25 15:56:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That fucker always skipped my house, too. I had gifts from mom and dad, but never from Santa! AND he's a creepy prowler freak. We didn't have a chimney, so my mom said he comes in the windows. That scared the shit out of me.
Submitted by adept256 (user info) at 2003-11-25 10:33:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nice concept well written keep it up ;p
Submitted by Choppa (user info) at 2003-11-25 09:31:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
where there any hot female elves?
Submitted by Manfre (user info) at 2003-11-25 08:17:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh man this was fuckin hilarious!
I have a picture of Santa myself. Except I had a hard time posting it last night.
Shit I hope Ashlee saved it when I sent it to her. I want her to send it back to me so I can post it now that Im at work.
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2003-11-25 08:09:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Some people have it, and some people just dont Hair...
the world will never know.
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2003-11-25 07:49:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-25 02:50:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
-2 FoR TRYING TO PASS THIS OFF AS TRUE!
What?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-25 07:39:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-25 02:50:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
-2 FoR TRYING TO PASS THIS OFF AS TRUE!
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-25 01:02:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking awesome!
Submitted by discordinbward (user info) at 2003-11-24 23:27:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
good shit.
Submitted by soup at 2003-11-24 23:16:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I couldn't even finish reading this. Congratulations on getting on boredatwork.com though
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2003-11-24 22:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
:)
Submitted by Mousie at 2003-11-24 22:19:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you are a sad strange little man...and you have my pity
Submitted by JayP at 2003-11-24 22:14:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Pff.... riiight
Submitted by daidoji (user info) at 2003-11-24 21:18:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Its so sad. What happened to all the presents santa was going to give to me.
Submitted by sam_el (user info) at 2003-11-24 18:06:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You remind me of that one French kid in South Park Bigger, Longer & Uncut. What was his name, the mole? He hated God and stuff. It reminds me of that.
Submitted by tolbertap <tolbertap.at.msn.com> at 2003-11-24 17:49:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It wasn't that funny, i just gave you the point for the kids evil look.
Submitted by Valacosa (user info) at 2003-11-24 17:01:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, this was pretty good.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2003-11-24 12:28:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the evil look on the kid in the far right corner of the picture.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2003-11-24 12:24:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Jesus at 2003-11-24 12:07:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
It showed a certain amount of creativity, but would have been more stylish with less swearing. Or perhaps with more stylish swearing.
Submitted by NotApologizing (user info) at 2003-11-24 10:29:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Too bad you didn't get him before he molested that young boy in Santa Barbara.
Oh wait, that was Michael Jackson... Ah hell! Who can tell those 2 apart anyways.
Submitted by Bob_Dole (user info) at 2003-11-24 10:16:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuckin A.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2003-11-24 08:13:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
cool
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-11-24 07:48:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome.
Submitted by Otter (user info) at 2003-11-24 07:22:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good. Made me laugh out loud.
The picture is great.
Submitted by NickTheDivine (user info) at 2003-11-23 21:54:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2003-11-23 19:36:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night...
Submitted by Confusion (user info) at 2003-11-23 19:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good job.
Submitted by prezuiwf (user info) at 2003-11-23 18:55:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is absolutley great.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2003-11-23 18:42:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by bort (user info) at 2003-11-23 18:41:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by ThanMan (user info) at 2003-11-23 17:52:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Zach_Cramer <zach_cramer.at.hotmail.com> at 2003-11-23 17:18:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent. That's classic literature
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2003-11-23 16:56:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-11-23 15:39:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by mox9 (user info) at 2003-11-23 11:24:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Reminds me of the X-mas special for the Lobo DC comic book. Lobo vs Santa. Anyways +2 anytime elves get Fragged.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2003-11-23 03:26:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nothing but awesome.
Submitted by GrizzlyHunter62 (user info) at 2003-11-23 02:40:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love it. Awesome. I have a friend who'll really really appreciate this. Fuck this was good. Please tell my you wrote it and this isn't plagerism.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2003-11-23 02:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kicker of all ass. BAW?
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2003-11-23 02:01:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHA
+2 for picture.
-Tom
Submitted by ess2s2 (user info) at 2003-11-23 01:56:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'Twas the night before summer,
And on top of the house
Lay Santa's rotting corpse,
Getting picked at by a mouse.