My girlfriend's bony elbows... (2740 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 0.7 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by kgbpasha (View user info) at 2003-11-27 05:03:47 EST
So my friend Weston is over and he's rolling j's. He's telling me how
he could beat Willie Nelson in a joint rolling contest. I replied with
an obvious, "Dude you could probably hold your own against Snoop Dogg,
but Willie is way out of your fucking league." I allowed myself to say
'dude' because I was high. Then as I'm sitting there on the couch, my
girlfriend(sitting next to me), is doing normal girlfriend things like
talking and trying to display affection toward me...but she keeps stabbing
me with her elbows. I'm not sure if it was on purpose but it starts
to annoy me.
So then I tell her that I'm going to have to buy her some elbow pads for
Christmas to compliment the kneepads I got her for my birthday. She starts
to talk again(in a little higher pitch) and all I hear is Charlie Brown's
teacher talking because at that moment in my field of vision, I see Weston
holding out the roach.
He then says, "'Ere, dude" and starts to laugh a little. I look at the roach
and I see why he's laughing. His roach-clip is fashioned from a little
corn-cob holder, shaped like an ear of corn. You know the ones. Ahhh..'ear,
dude'..I get it...and it starts me laughing.
My girl doesn't get it but instead elbows me again as I'm hunched over in
laughter. I think she was pissed for some regular girl reason. I didn't care
until she jabbed me again(on purpose this time), with her sharp-ass elbow
right between a couple of ribs. I temporarily didn't know whether to start
groaning in agony or continue with my "ere(ear)dude" laughter. My brain chose
laughter and she stompted away.
Weston yells to her, "Yeah, I'll take one!"..thinking she was going for a beer.
This post is getting to be longer than the lemonade line in hell so i'm gonna
finish it with a picture of my girlfriend. Well, it's not actually her but
the elbows are exactly identical to hers in their bony-ness factor...and that's
what the mega-stoned author is trying to convey. Fuck, my ribs still hurt.
User Reviews
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2004-03-19 05:48:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No, different girlfriend...
hey, I just noticed this bony-elbowed chick
has what looks like a bruise on her leg...
probably from sitting on the toilet and holding
her head up with her arms as her bony elbows dig in...
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2003-12-10 22:34:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
is this the same one who is now in the pokie?
Submitted by downtime (user info) at 2003-12-07 04:42:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kudos to you for calling attention to that girl's elbows...most people probably never notice she has elbows.
Mmmmmmmmm pointy - Homer Simpson
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2003-11-27 15:15:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
One time, I accidentally let fly in my girlfriend's ey eand it got all swollen.... I felt bad for days. Mostly because I knew it meant a serious restriction on blow jobs for a LONG time..
Submitted by GrizzlyHunter62 (user info) at 2003-11-27 15:11:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I know what you mean. Elbows are the worst. I've never been purposely elbowed by my girlfriend, but accidently once and my eye got all swollen.
Submitted by Lord_Of_The_Strings (user info) at 2003-11-27 12:05:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
There is a girl in my Kickboxing class that she reminds me of, the girl in the picture that is not your girlfriend
Submitted by jodmyster (user info) at 2003-11-27 07:56:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
the joke about the ear of corn was pretty damn crap!
maybe you have to be high to find it funny
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2003-11-27 05:16:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Marry me Kristen, youll never have to worry about anything again. Except money, and food, and a house...but those are minor obstacles
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2003-11-27 05:14:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Hair is obviously a fortune teller.
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2003-11-27 05:12:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn, this is supposed to be about the elbows!
Does anyone see her fucking sharp razorlike elbows?
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2003-11-27 05:06:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I can see my semen on that girl's ass.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2003-11-27 05:04:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think I can see my reflection in that girl's ass.