Cunt as a Catalyst. (8976 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: -0.12 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <ann_landers.at.abortionstickle.com> (View user info) at 2003-12-06 21:01:07 EST
Inspired by http://www.ubersite.com/m/20070 and an event similar to this that my roommate just suffered, I decided to react the best way I knew how... writing. I don't pretend to know everything, but this is what I do know and believe to be true at this point in my life, at the ripe age of 22. I'm no longer bitter for what I've been through and I'm thankful for it, but I've got a few notes as to why it all occurs and some side-effects of it all on myself and on society in general as these things occur to them.
I just nursed my roommate through the hell that a woman can be, and every man will go through it before he wises up and realizes that there's a reason that one of the most offensive words in the English language has been applied to women: Cunt. What's the worst thing you can call a man? Take your best shot, nothing you can come up with will ever amount to the one syllable donkey punch that is Cunt. Women have earned such a title, and the above url is just one more testament as to how and why women have *earned* it.
Most every guy I know treated his first, maybe his second, and possibly even his third girlfriend like a fucking princess. We're talking flowers, breaking house rules to see her at odd hours, risking whatever it took to accommodate her every single whim and desire... and what happens? She snaps a cock off in you like you never dreamed existed... not in your most photoshopped imagination had you dreamed a penetration could run so deep, but these bitches do it; all of them at least once.
Most do it until they've matured and realize that it's horseshit to commit to such antics, and then they settle into a nice pattern of dating assholes (I don't know if this is out of guilt). Now these same Cunts will later wonder "Why am I dating an asshole"? Well, let me explain something, you made the asshole as the previous paragraph explains. Granted, some guys are born dicks, and that's fine and good, but a vast majority of men I know have a lack of respect for women today because of the way that they were treated in spite of treating some candy assed heart raping cutie like the sweet thing she seemed to be. So the point here is, you've made your bed and then you have to lay in it, poor fucking you. If you didn't do it and you are a nice gal, then wonderful, a tremendous applause goes out to you and you have my undying respect and love at your feet (not that you'd really give a shit, but someone you care about one day will appreciate that, and you can always respect yourselves). The point is, you collectively as an entire gender cause a premature evolution of many a young male from innocent boy into hard shelled asshole with a shattered heart that subconsciously desires nothing more than revenge on Cunt in any medium possible. If you end up being the medium for this "self-expression" then so be it, you will grow and be stronger for it as well.
Finally women realize that assholes are tools, and if they didn't get pregnant by some asshole, then they are lucky enough to move on. At this point those that did get pregnant either stick or leave and raise a kid with no father, happy fucking day... another by product of Cunt is the ability to make stupid decisions like getting pregnant with T-bone's baby boy. On to those that take advantage of the metamorphosis that they've just undergone as they bloom from asshole into something more, at this point they go find a nice guy with a decent salary who treats them well in spite of the shit that their gender has collectively placed at his doorstep and shoved down his throat. At this point, the man is usually "in the know" about Cunt and has been burned by Cunt, has more Cunt since, and has given up worrying incessantly about Cunt and has accepted playing the field as a phenomenal alternative wherein you get to plow the bliss yielding fields of cunt at your leisure with no real long term Cunt oriented threats. He is now a man.
Once the woman involved finally gets over the asshole man that her female cohorts have produced/fostered the development of in some fashion or another, she can move on to a nice guy who is simply plowing away. She walks into his field with her battered former Cunt soul and is now a woman.
Pain makes us men and women, we inflict this pain upon one another until we've dealt with it ourselves. It is inevitable and an ongoing cycle, and it's fucking disgusting, but if you're young and reading this, then expect to be burned. If you're old and reading this, then something of this nature has probably happened to yourself or someone with whom you're close. It's part of one of the many human tragedies in which we all take a part and play a role. Women, I urge you to bypass the stage of Cunt and just find some asshole named Dale or Rusty or some shit like that who is an alcoholic in a trailer and date him for a few months or years until you have a hearty appreciation of nice men. Or if you want, just accept your fate and be a Cunt until you mature out of it and realize that Cunt should only be used to refer to the blissful beef curtains tucked comfortably away between your thighs.
This is all under the assumption that the woman is attractive, I don't wanna hear anything negative out of you obese Cunts who think you're the nicest thing since sliced fucking bread. What it boils down to is that you don't have a choice but to be nice because otherwise noone will talk to you or do jack shit with you. Your parents tied a fucking steak around your neck to get the dog to play with you, etc. You're like a fucking cow, you get attention when people need milk, otherwise you better be like the Blue Bell Ice Cream cow and sing some nice fucking notes to garner any further attention. Proof of this is a fat Cunt that lived near here recently who pissed off everyone, and spent a few months alone before moving to Denver. Supposedly, she now has friends, apparently the fat Cunt learned to be nice because when she was mean no one wanted jack shit to do with her.
Ann Landers is a Cunt and if you find this offensive, go fuck yourself.
User Reviews
Submitted by PAS at 2003-12-08 07:55:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Random Joe I'm not logged in either but I assume that was you, ann_landers.
I'm really pleased for you that you lost all that weight, well done. As an ex fatty why are you such a horrible bastard to current tubbies...do you have the attitude that you did it and so can they? Well that is fair enough but no need to be such an insulting cunt about it.
I appreciate your offer of help...feel free to email me...it's not hard to find my email address on this site.
I would like you to appreciate that I never take these flame wars too seriously and usually find them quite amusing...so try not to take what insults I have given you too personally. I disagree with your POV but you're one of the more intelligent and better written contributers to Ubersite.
You may find this amusing http://www.ubersite.com/m/5044 - Yidele loves me.
Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2003-12-07 22:28:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
What virgil said.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-12-07 21:35:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've met Johnny Cash, in TN. Eat a cock, we had a beer.
Hahaha, stupid cunt, nice one. By the way, the man liked me, and surely a fucking douche such as yourself would never respect the man if you were more familiar with his legend. Then again, maybe you see yourself being a fat Cunt as some similar obstacle that he had faced in his lifetime.
Anyway, I would like to put our differences aside in the hope of helping you, and possibly settling on a truce... I myself have lost 110 lbs. and I was also once an obese pig wallowing in my own lard from day to day. I would like to offer you my help and services in losing weight as I have done with many others since I lost my weight 5 years ago. Take it or leave it, I'm making an attempt at this thing some of you call humanitarianism or caring... you get the point.
Even Ann Landers in her infinite repugnance would appreciate my offer to you. Don't knock a hand offering to pull you out of a hole.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-12-07 17:56:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It seems that Johnny Cash and Ann Landers have something in common.
Oh well, maybe Abby Landers will buttfuck you with a strap-on.
Early one morning
With time to kill
I borrowed Jebb's rifle
And sat on a hill
I saw ann_landers
Crossing the plain
I drew a bead on him
To practice my aim
My brother's rifle
Went off in my hand
A shot rang out
Across the land
The horse, he kept running
The rider was dead
"Thank God" I said
"Thank God" I said
Don't get me wrong you brainless twerp, I don't have anything against Johnny Cash RIP - it's you I dislike. If Mr Cash had had the misfortune to meet you I'm sure he'd have target practiced immediately on your enormous bonce. Asshat.
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-07 17:37:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
original, seriously... if you ever defile Johnnny Cash again, I'll fucking strap into a biochemical hazmat suit complete with oxygen and bring an allout chainsaw assault on your filthy cunt in hopes that you may never reproduce again.
Have you no respect for gods amongst men?
Thanks again for proving my point, yet another exemplification of why Cunt is nothing more than
Cunt.
PeopleAreStrange/Ann Landers - a Cunt riled force to be reckon with, goddamn.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-12-07 17:06:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get_attach.cgi/finger.bmp?message=1057857331111910593&part=1
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-07 15:53:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jordanna>> If I was here to blow my wad over having people like me love me and dig me, then I'd be reviewing their posts and writing things that I thought would cater to their desires. And if you want to make any more friends on here, then I'd reccommend you do us all a favor and get some semblance of a background in spelling as well as grammar. You're limited by your ignorance, not your Cunt attitude.
A threesome with you, PAS, and Ann Landers is in order.
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-07 15:50:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"I could slate you. It's easy to get into a slanging match with some stranger whom I'll never meet. But you're not worth anymore of my time. Press that little x in the top right hand corner of your screen. Don't come back, you won't be missed."
hahaha, you daft clumsy bitch, great job in assuming that I'm using a tremendous OS such as Windows... you daft fucktard Cunt... my "x" isn't in the top right, even in my windows... asstard.
Ann Landers buttfucked you again. Take your own advice (it'll work on your PC).
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-07 15:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"You're such a nasty person with a vicious sense of humour I'm glad you've been shat on from a great height.
May many more women treat you like the piece of shit that you are.
VIVA LA CUNTS!"
--PeopleAreStrange
Thank you for your compliments on my sense of humor...
As for being shat on from a great height, I didn't notice being shat on terribly often here... lots of people agreed with me actually, save for you who regrettably does count for two people. You being the main shitter, and we all know your ass is dragging on the ground, I don't know exactly to whom you're referring to.
Thank you, go fuck yourself, and change your name, Jim Morrison wants nothing of his associated with you.
PeopleAreStrange and other fat Cunts should do this world a favor and offer to Eat Ann Landers in reparation for their wreckless attempts to ruin something so pure and chaste as nice smooth pussy wrapped neatly around the bone which prevents you from going right through a pussy.
Submitted by virgil (user info) at 2003-12-07 12:52:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
interesting read, though not entirely unique.
Submitted by GrizzlyHunter62 (user info) at 2003-12-07 11:39:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
All a woman is looking for is a guy who treats her like an equal, treats her like a queen when she needs it, and knows how to give her mind-blowing orgasms. I mean, really, what else is there to be needed in a man?
I love being that man.
Submitted by IndianOcean (user info) at 2003-12-07 10:44:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WORD..
i agree.. my room-mates say I don't have any respect for woman.
girls tend to go for aholes first than the nice guy..
Submitted by jordanna (user info) at 2003-12-07 10:14:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Look, who ever the fuck you are, You obviously haven't been with Uber long enough to realise the only opinions anyone gives a shit about are thos of the longstanding, well respected posters.
Most of the men that fall into this catergory probably wont relate agree with your post as they cannot relate to such raving, ranting bullshit about cunts and so on.
They majority of people that will agree with you will be the ubermorons that fall off this site in a matter of months if not weeks.
You may find that PeopleAreStrange (PAS) Is a well respected longstanding member of the ubercommunity. There for slating her is only going to gain you enemies here.
So to sum up:
Nobody gives a fuck about your extremely biased, ridiculously offensive opinion.
Those that do agree, will fall off along with you and all the other morons that latch onto this sight to no eventual avail.
By arguing with PAS you only stand to gain enemies.
So.......Er...........
FUCK OFF.
Submitted by jordanna (user info) at 2003-12-07 10:02:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Im with a PAS.
There's only one cunt on this site, and it aint me!!
When I find a man worthy of being treated with respect I shall do so.
Until then, If they come with a shitty attitude, they leave with a worse one.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-12-07 09:00:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Another thing 'Mr 22 think you know everything about the whole fucking world' I'm not proud to be overweight, I never have been...but why would I lie about it on the internet and pretend to be something I'm not?
I could slate you. It's easy to get into a slanging match with some stranger whom I'll never meet. But you're not worth anymore of my time. Press that little x in the top right hand corner of your screen. Don't come back, you won't be missed.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-12-07 08:50:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"Your post doesn't deserve a reply because you said you're fat and I said I didn't wanna hear any shit from any broad that was a fat ass."
What you want and what you GET are two different things. Like my replies. Like your girlfriends.
You're such a nasty person with a vicious sense of humour I'm glad you've been shat on from a great height.
May many more women treat you like the piece of shit that you are.
VIVA LA CUNTS!
Submitted by LordDull (user info) at 2003-12-07 04:06:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dont worry the joke is on women. When they turn 32 they cant stop rubbing between their legs, while you on the other hand couldnt care less. Sure it still feels good and its nice, but the football game is on!
I wasnt born a dick but a fawked up mother taught me to be one. I treated my GF's like shit, and yes they loved it. Women want a man who reminds them of DAD, Dad made the rules, she expects the same from you. Dont do it and you'll never have her respect...
Now I have a wonderful woman and I treat her as nice as possible, but I still make the rules....
Submitted by Zeccs (user info) at 2003-12-07 03:17:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ive gotten confused over euphemisms.
See, you can call someone a dick or cock, and still get the same meaning across... they're straightforward. Right? But the trick comes in with female euphemisms. Cunt and pussy, are almost completely opposite in meaning.
But how is this possible? How can a word supposedly representing the same thing as another have a completely different meaning? Doesn't that defy all common sense and logic? WHAT THE FUCK IS THE WORLD COMING TO!
I fear i've gone too far in discussing this.....
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2003-12-07 02:55:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good shit. I went through this phase when I was a teenager and not getting any. Always made it to "third base", as the Yanks might say, but no further. Then the bitch gives up to my sleazier, more cocky best friend who - you guessed - is an asshole and treats her like shit. What's worse is that she fucking LOVES HIM FOR IT! WTF?
I then spend the following weekends listening to her pour her heart about That Bastard and not getting any love because we're "just friends". Bitch.
I shouldn't dump it all on the women though. My "friend" made a habit of "sloppy-seconds" just because he was a competitive arsehole. Somebody said it was because he had low self-esteem and was constantly in need of an ego boost. I said it was because he was a prick. I was right.
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-07 02:18:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
RideJohnnyRide>> You practically paraphrase me, read moron...
FreightTrain>> Reading comprehension is obviously not your strong point. I've considered "dumbing down" lots of my writing in my time, but I refuse to do so. Get a fucking clue, exactly what you state is writting within the post...
May the mighty revolting vagina of Ann Landers feast upon your heads.
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2003-12-07 00:36:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I read the article half way and still did not understand what the hell you were trying to say. So I stopped reading.
For god's sakes, what is the point in what you wrote? Guy are assholes? Girls create assholes? Girls date assholes so they are cunts? What? Huh?!.. Anyway, it is a pity to see that you wrote such a lengthy parapgraph and nobody can make a shit out of it. If i ask you right now what the hell you were trying to say, you will not be able to give me a straight answer.
Anyway, back to the topic. Girls date assholes. I don't know why. Probably because they are stupid. Being a nice guy I always suffered from it. But now I decided to be an asshole too, so ladies would dig me. But I cannot. I can't just transform into an asshole, does not work that way.
You have to be born an asshole to get alot of pussy. Being a nice guy like me, I have to settle for the left overs. Thank you very much ladies, good choice.
Submitted by RideJohnnyRide (user info) at 2003-12-07 00:18:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Doesn't happen anymore, I learned long ago how to treat a woman "equally" as you so ridiculously put it. Treating women equally gets you shit on as well... Equality to a woman is when you're firm, and it's okay to cross that boundary... better to cross it I've found than to be too lenient
in making decisions on what you'll take your stands on and what you won't.
So. To paraphrase, too many girls laughed at your small penis and now you're an abusive boyfriend?
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-06 23:22:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Your post doesn't deserve a reply because you said you're fat and I said I didn't wanna hear any shit from any broad that was a fat ass. I suppose then that the only explanation for this is that you were inhaling bon bons while reading through my post and due to it's length, your fat cheeks caught up to your fat eye lids and you made the mistake of replying to this in the midst of absolute terror from having fattened yourself to a point of blindness...
In reply to you in case you've dieted your sight back:
Doesn't happen anymore, I learned long ago how to treat a woman "equally" as you so ridiculously put it. Treating women equally gets you shit on as well... Equality to a woman is when you're firm, and it's okay to cross that boundary... better to cross it I've found than to be too lenient
in making decisions on what you'll take your stands on and what you won't.
The heftiest broad I've tagged was 145, if that's fat then great, otherwise it should be noted that I've never had the opportunity to get rejected by a tubby cunt because none of them are worth my time in the first place to chance interaction, much less rejection. Also, I'm glad you're comfortable enough with the fact that you're a tubby cunt to go blathering about it all over the interweb, had you spent less time watching Oprah or reading Ann Landers or doing whatever the fuck you did to get comfortable with it and more time attempting to lose the weight, then you'd be better off...
For the meanwhile, do me a favor and eat Ann Landers so I can get another name of some asshole I hate on here.
Submitted by PeopleAreStrange (user info) at 2003-12-06 21:11:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Your mistake is treating your girlfriends like a princess in the first place. Treat a woman like your equal then you won't get this shit happening to you.
Some of this was funny:
"I don't wanna hear anything negative out of you obese Cunts who think you're the nicest thing since sliced fucking bread. What it boils down to is that you don't have a choice but to be nice because otherwise noone will talk to you or do jack shit with you. Your parents tied a fucking steak around your neck to get the dog to play with you, etc. You're like a fucking cow, you get attention when people need milk, otherwise you better be like the Blue Bell Ice Cream cow and sing some nice fucking notes to garner any further attention."
You're so insulting to fat chicks it made it wonder - did you get turned down by one? hahahahah
By the way I'm fat and I wouldn't go near you with a bargepole.
Submitted by ann_landers (user info) at 2003-12-06 21:03:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
for the record, I just wrote this in a hurry, and I know having read over it after posting it that it has it's grammatical errors... deal with it, it's a billion times more legible than most of the shit I've been offered to read through on here lately.