We came from a monkey or from Adam, either way is bullshit.... (2370 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.93 on 67 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by someone <useme.at.always.com> (View user info) at 2003-12-23 19:13:38 EST
Recently I entertained myself with listening to the theories of our existence, both from a creationist and evolutionist viewpoint. Before I began about the flaws in each, I will quickly describe what has been told to me:
Creationist- An all powerful God decided to create something in his "like image". Upon completion of the world, he created Adam, a man. This man, in his mortal and limited state of mind, soon became lonely. God took a rib from Adam and created Eve, a woman, with it, which supposedly is why women have one more rib then man. They eventually sinned, in which they fell from their conversation like state with God, and, flash forward several thousand years, here we are.
Evolutionist- A fusion of certain chemicals and undescribed reactions created a cloud of dust, which over several million (it's always millions for evolution) years eventually formed our earth. Then, over many chemical changes and "evolutions" along with a hearty dose of math and physics, our moon separated from us, forming the oceans and creating more and more evolutions, one of which eventually spawned life. Millions of years later, man was created, remember this all happened by a single cell.
Again, this is very brief, and it has all been formed by several different persons view and my own limited research. Here are my reasons why each is bullshit:
Creationist- Without diving into the saturated and heavily argued topic of religion, I will quickly point out several problems with a creationist viewpoint. First off is the lack of proof or explanation of race, species or developed characteristics (evolution obviously, but more on this later) Instead they tend to throw Bible verses or change the subject instead of answering MY FUCKING QUESTIONS. The other problem I have with creation is why an all powerful, all knowing God would create this Adam if the dumb fucker would turn around and BETRAY HIM. Does this make sense to anyone??? My only defense in terms of Creationists is God wanted to have a good time, meaning even though he knew all this, he was bored and really didn't care Adam was going to be such a fucktard.
Evolutionist- Obviously, evolution to a large extent is real. As Darwin said, "survival of the fittest". This is the explanation of race, of species, of learned characteristics. We evolve, to an extent, to our environment and our situations. However, there are some things that don't add up. First, if an evolutionist wants me to believe I am typing this at this very moment, in the comfort of this house, smoking a plant that gets my high because of a single chemical reaction so rare and impossible advanced math cant even began to calculate the probabilities, well I am calling BULLSHIT. An evolutionist must then believe in extraterrestrial life, and entirely in chance as opposed to fate or faith, providing they are staying true to their beliefs. Also, to say I came from a monkey is pure, pure bullshit. Their has not been any REAL proof to this theory, and saying that because they share similar behavior and intelligence to a human DOES NOT MEAN WE CAME FROM MONKEYS! If this is the case, then we are they still not evolving? When did "chance" say "enough, monkeys must stop evolving into humans and must remain constant?"
In conclusion, my current theory on life is people spend way to much time arguing who is right or wrong, who is going to burn in hell, who is going to be reincarnated or approximately when in the 700 million years of evolution we came to change into humans. The truth is, no one really knows. We are playing a guessing game about who is wrong and right and for some people it consumes their whole life. You will know when you die; my only warning is you better be sure that when you're ready to go you better hope that you are right. Until then, im saying fuck all these theories and screaming BULLSHIT!
-so
User Reviews
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-11-19 19:20:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
That's the worst critique of evolution I've ever heard.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-11-19 18:46:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This is second in the MRR on the Uber Parent Directory user thing.
This sucks.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-08 21:36:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Pyroneus <Pyroneus.at.kenopets.com> at 2004-09-22 04:24:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i totally agree with you. a litte addition to what you are saying though.
A flaw with both of them is that you both have something that appeared out of nowhere. "God" and that single celled organism.. WHERE THE FUCK DID THEY COME FROM!?!?!?
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2004-01-01 09:06:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If you look at what he wrote it states how all people came from a black person initially, which most would use to say they are the parent race to try to establish superiority and say that others are mutated versions. Its an argument I've seen used before and I thought thats what he(?) was trying to use.
Submitted by Adereterial (user info) at 2003-12-28 12:22:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My vote goes with the Stargate aliens... all of them.
Submitted by Adereterial (user info) at 2003-12-28 12:15:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I hold to both evolution and the existence of life on other worlds. However, creationism and extraterrestial life are not mutually exclusive. After all, if we evolved, it can happen elsewhere, if we were created, that too can happen elsewhere. Subscribing to either of those theories (which is all they are) without accepting the possibility of life outside (or inside) this solar system is geo-centric, anachronous and mediaeval. Surely the existence of other species of some intelligence on this planet alone is proof enough that either theory must take into account the possibility of life elsewhere? Why do some hold onto the notion that we are the centre of the universe?
Submitted by ruin (user info) at 2003-12-28 03:40:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Ruin, I don't know why you're praising Franger. He thought you were black. Like me, many people knew you were being a racist jerk as usual. In fact, he got what you said wrong...
Franger, he wasn't trying to make it sound like blacks were superior. You got it wrong"
i know, it's why i like him, he tried to see all explanations for what i wrote, that he got it wrong is neither here nor there, the fact he aacrually considered it AND expressed AS WELL as his other opinions it is what impressed me... no one else around here does that unless it's some so of apathetic "um well okay i guess i dunno bleh" attitude thing.
i am not a rascist, i couldn't be, i hate everyone EQUALLY you see, even myself...
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2003-12-26 18:32:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe Adam was a monkey. He was hanging around a tree.
Submitted by FuriousGeorge (user info) at 2003-12-26 11:14:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
You are all missing the most important point of this entire post:
"fucktard" is the funniest insult ever
Submitted by Anti-Christ_Superstar (user info) at 2003-12-25 16:30:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
i can't be arsed to check if anyone has said this yet, so i'm gonna say it anyway, humans didn't evolve from monkeys, we evolved from a simpler form of primate, as did the monkeys, the ones who were to become humans learnt how to walk and probably moved out of the jungles and into the safer caves, then evolved into humans.
and by the way, i do believe in aliens, i just don't neccisarrily believe that they are anywhere near earth.
Submitted by fgSD at 2003-12-24 20:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
monkeys are funny.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-24 17:54:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Also, in response to Omega's comment "its easy to call bullshit on others without opening
up yours for attack", id have to say im somewhere in the middle of both. I honestly do feel
that both view have some serious flaws, and im not ready to commit to either view anytime soon.
If i were to SERIOUSLY argue a point, id do it better then this satire laced post. Many of
you are still -2ing this without scrolling down to read the reviews and get a better understanding.
Ohh well, maybe no one understands this, either way, MOST HEATED!!!!
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-24 17:47:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
MOST HEATED! YES!
Submitted by CobraCommander (user info) at 2003-12-24 17:21:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Big Gangbang theory. Definitely the big gangbang theory.
Submitted by Deisangua (user info) at 2003-12-24 17:03:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I think we're the result of alien DNA testing. Unbeknownst to us, the Earth really has this giant sign that says "CAUTION: HAZARDOUS BIOLOGICAL WASTE DEPOSIT" in some exterrestrial language.
Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2003-12-24 16:23:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, thanks.
Submitted by Lady_Emily_03 (user info) at 2003-12-24 15:24:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Maybe you just don't listen.
Submitted by scaryaaron (user info) at 2003-12-24 13:10:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're all wrong. The alien's from "The Thing" are by far the baddest ass aliens ever. You never saw them coming, they made you go insane, and just when you thought it was safe your dog splits open and out pops more of the bastards.
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-24 12:57:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Arcanis,
You misunderstood me, which is my fault, I wasn't clear. I accept evolution as the best explanation for life as we see it today. However, I don't "believe" in it, because it's not religion and it doesn't require a leap of faith. If something better comes along, I'll accept that instead, and reject evolution. I doubt that will happen, though. I'm certainly not a creationist, if that's the impression I gave.
Bryan Sykes at Oxford University wrote a book called the 7 Daughters of Eve in which he explains the "Eve" theory, which is that all people on this earth are descended from a single woman who lived roughly 200,000 years ago. They determined this through analysis of mitochrondrial DNA, which among European populations clusters into 7 types -- hence the 7 Daughters thing. It's a really well-written book, though the theory has come under fire because there's some evidence that fathers can also contribute mitochondrial DNA to their offspring. I don't know enough about evolutionary genetics to really argue one way or the other about the theory -- my education's been in skeletal biology.
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2003-12-24 12:35:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You refute both theories of evolution while providing no supporting argument as to why you're doing this.
That's bullshit.
Submitted by Omega (user info) at 2003-12-24 04:04:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 for not arguing an alternative or your viewpoint.
It's easy to call bullshit on other camps without opening up yours to attack.
Submitted by Acarnis (user info) at 2003-12-24 01:57:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, he actually put some thought on the Creationist side. I had the same questions, too. I asked a Christian biology teacher. He told me that he believes the different characteristics of the human race came through the mutation of our DNA by the sun as our ancestors moved out from the fertile crescent. The fertile crescent is the Middle East area. It is commonly believed that the Garden of Eden was in there somewhere, specifically Mesopotamia.
The other question is something a lot of people ask. It seems, however, that you think Adam betrayed God permanently, which he did not. He only made a mistake. God made human beings with the ability of free will. I suppose I don't remember reading anything else about His motive other than what's the usual. There was no question other than...yes, it does make sense.
Ruin, I don't know why you're praising Franger. He thought you were black. Like me, many people knew you were being a racist jerk as usual. In fact, he got what you said wrong...
Franger, he wasn't trying to make it sound like blacks were superior. You got it wrong.
Sunny... Why don't you believe in evolution if it's so related to your major? Could you tell me a brief explanation as to why Eve had to have lived 200,000 years ago?
Submitted by Kool_Kontakt (user info) at 2003-12-24 01:39:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Just plain retarded.
Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2003-12-24 01:23:24 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"She's gone from suck to blow!"
Barf, "Spaceballs"
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2003-12-24 01:19:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Take my hit and shove it, beeyotch.
Thumbs down. Why are we even trying to hold a discussion? It's pointless.
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2003-12-24 01:09:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't believe in evolution? These three steps will change your mind:
1. Search for the word, "jonukah" on ubersite.
2. From said search, find a picture of jonukah with shirt off.
3. Compare to monkey.
Done and done.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2003-12-24 00:32:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My money is on the aliens from Fifth Element. The stupid big headed ones.
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-23 23:14:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Ruin, no offense mate, but you seriously are an idiot. That's okay though, most people aren't familiar with the ins and outs of evolutionary theory, it's not your fault you buy into an explanation for bipedalism that's 10 years out of date. Also, I'm not a dickhead. Bitch maybe. "Stupid cunt" was a term bandied about a few days ago. Can girls be dickheads? I'm not sure, but let's stick to gender-specific insults.
Joke, no joke...who gives a shit. People spouting misinformation...that gets my panties in a twist.
Yes -- pooping is a good thing. Excellent for colon health. Good for you.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2003-12-23 22:32:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i pooped a few minutes ago.
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2003-12-23 22:10:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I could be wrong about a lot of things, I try not to worry about it.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 22:09:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
isnt alien vs. predator written by paul anderson, director of the craptacular Resident
Evil?? I could be wrong.......
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2003-12-23 22:08:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No shit sherlock.
Submitted by Clockwork (user info) at 2003-12-23 22:08:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus, H. Christ. You people are pathetic. This thread is a joke.
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:55:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You also bring up some fine points. However i have to disagree with the Alien being hard. Ripley kicked some Alien ass with a powerloader and that thing was used for just lifting stuff.
Stuff? Stuff??? Did you see the SIZE of that thing? You will admit that it was a fairly large thing for lifting stuff considering that they could just turn the Gravity off in the docking bay? And, to be fair - she did have to suck the alien out of a hole in the window to actually do it any damage... and those arguments aside - wasn't that the human hybrid mutant alien anyway? I forget.
The StarGate aliens were pretty baddass, and they did have that cool healing chamber thing. However without those fancy snachu helmets and staffs there just humans.
Ahhh... Dr RB, valuable comments all told, but NO. They can heal themselves, and act mostly like a kickarse tape worm, only instead of draining you they make you hard as FUCK... and you're eyes and voice go all cool too.
Predators are the most badass by far. In predator one the alien killed Apollo from Rocky, Jessy "The body" Ventura, and a host of other steriod infused army guys. Only then did Arnie open a can of whoop ass.
No, arnie got covered in mud, confused the predator (who by the way could not eat you in one go like the Alien aliens because of his pussy little mouth) and then blew him up with various home made jungle bombs.
The predator without all the technology is a wimp - plain and simple, and lets face it - he's not smart either if he can be fool by a face pack and some exploding branches being fired at him.
I guess we will find out when Alien vs Predator comes out in the theatres next year.
Yes, yes we will... I have offered my services to the makers of the movie to ensure that all of the laws of quantum physics will be followed and that the alien wins (opps).
I have to go now, I have melted through a lid of something with my cigarette because I was too engrossed in this (the most important argument of all time) and I thought it was an ashtray. I have also burnt my desk and have to clean it up.
Submitted by ruin (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:51:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
WHAT A BUNCH OF FUKKING CRAZY CHRISTIANISED FREAKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you people are totally fukked in head!!!!!!!!!!!!!
...
posted by sunny
"We already know what happens to chimps when they go out onto the savannah...they walk on four legs, or knucklewalk. They don't walk bipedally. It's unreasonable to assume our chimp-like ancestors would have behaved differently."
this is true, chimps do walk on all fours, THIS IS BECAUSE THEY CHIMPS AND NOT HUMANS!!!!!
now then dickhead, WE walk on our two legs because one certain kind of chimp in one certain part of africa slowly started to walk more and more upright as millions of years went by, this is EVOLUTION!!!
...
-1000 for the original poster SOMEONE because this post has attracted a bunch of weirdo's who have insulted me by carelessly showing me and reminding me how fukking stupid some american people can be ALL the time.
+1002 because FRANGER is clever and perceptive and understands how to read a message and understand it's essential meaning and where the writer is coming from regardless of ones own personal views.
-1004 because SOMEONE is a tosser who suggests people are afraid to believe in nothing but yet he posts that message knowing full well that people are going to respond to that message anyway because that is what people do on a POSTING FORUM.
if i don't know or understand something i'm happy to accept my ignorance of it, that's life...
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:45:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good point, Good point.
Although - what if they had some anti lazer technology that we're unaware of because we haven't invented it yet?
I mean, the Predator was cool, but all Arney had to do was cover himself in mud to fool him... whereas the stargate Gaoul (whatever - Im not an expert) were just up themselves and could probably have kicked our arses had they not been so big headed.
And we all know that Aliens aliens are the hardest - I noticed how you didnt even bring them up in the equation of the fight with lazer beams.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You also bring up some fine points. However i have to disagree with the Alien being hard. Ripley kicked some Alien ass with a powerloader and that thing was used for just lifting stuff.
The StarGate aliens were pretty baddass, and they did have that cool healing chamber thing. However without those fancy snachu helmets and staffs there just humans.
Predators are the most badass by far. In predator one the alien killed Apollo from Rocky, Jessy "The body" Ventura, and a host of other steriod infused army guys. Only then did Arnie open a can of whoop ass.
I guess we will find out when Alien vs Predator comes out in the theatres next year.
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:39:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:24:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
According to Stargate we were made by aliens.
Kinda like Eqyptians, but aliens non the less.
I wonder if the Eqyptian aliens fought the Predator aliens or the Alien aliens.
I think the Predator Aliens would win. They had lazor-beams and all. Cant fight people with lazer-beams.
******************
Good point, Good point.
Although - what if they had some anti lazer technology that we're unaware of because we haven't invented it yet?
I mean, the Predator was cool, but all Arney had to do was cover himself in mud to fool him... whereas the stargate Gaoul (whatever - Im not an expert) were just up themselves and could probably have kicked our arses had they not been so big headed.
And we all know that Aliens aliens are the hardest - I noticed how you didnt even bring them up in the equation of the fight with lazer beams.
Anyway, we're all missing the point. We're here. Im here. Is that not ENOUGH for you people - you gotta question why?
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:32:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't believe in evolution.
I accept it as the best explanation for the origins of life on this planet given the evidence. If something better comes along, as a scientist I will reject evolution and accept this new theory.
Anyway, I don't really care what you believe, it has no bearing on my life whatsoever. However, if you're going to say evolution is bullshit, you should at least have the correct facts at your disposal.
It's not about intelligence, it's about getting it right. We didn't evolve from monkeys, to say so is incorrect based on the evidence.
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:29:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by ruin (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:55:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
+2 for disagreeing with creationism, a insane view held largely by black american christians and frigid librarian-type middle-aged white snooty christian bitches (the monkey theory probably makes blacks edgy hehehe... don't know why - the ape we DID evolve from had WHITE skin)
-2 for disagreeing for evolutionism, of course we evolved from apes, we evolved from a certain breed of chimpanzee that used to live in trees in east africa but the trees disappeared in that region due to climate change and those chimps had to learn to adapt to living on open plains where very fast meat-eaters could catch them so they had to get smarter and learn how to walk for long distances, hence human uprightness, no other apes evolved this way because it was a VERY secular regional situation that didn't change for millions of years, many different breeds evolved you know, some very different to us, did you know that neanderthals didn't have sweat glands? they just breathed through their gigantic noses and it cooled/warmed the air going into their bodies.
now the particular ape-man that survived long enough to become us had WHITE skin, over time with the loss of body hair became black skin as they were naked and out in the sun all the time.
all humans other than blacks are descended from ONE black woman about 80,000 yrs ago, deal with THAT shit.
i'd say it's a mix of evolutionism and something like oh say god perhaps, some shit like that...
anyway, zero for you...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I love this because I'm pretty sure he's trying to say black people are better but really this says that white people are superior to black as we have evolved more.
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2003-12-23 21:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
According to Stargate we were made by aliens.
Kinda like Eqyptians, but aliens non the less.
I wonder if the Eqyptian aliens fought the Predator aliens or the Alien aliens.
I think the Predator Aliens would win. They had lazor-beams and all. Cant fight people with lazer-beams.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:43:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Furthermore, it amuses me how quickly you people jump at the chance to show your intellegence,
quickly proving how evolution is in fact true. The fact is, you don't know anything your saying
as an absolute truth. Your thoughts and beliefs are all based on theories and assumptions.
Thats right, i said beliefs, meaning theoretical science is a religion too and in a sense
you're all no better then the christians or jews. People are afraid to believe in nothing.
I guess that in a sense was the point of this post
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:33:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This is not supposed to be a funny post either. Nor am i trying to explain to anyone that
it was "funny". Just forget it, at least try to make this most heated.......
Submitted by CobraCommander (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:17:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Right, same deal, if you were making satire no big deal. If you weren't, no offense, the engineer in me just shot himself when he saw that is all.
Submitted by jimbo (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:17:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Your lack of intelligence is astounding.
Submitted by CobraCommander (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:16:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Generally speaking, bipeds are much slower than quadropeds. The only bipeds that I can think of that are fast are ostriches, but in terms of avg speed, i.e. getting away from a predatory, their avg speed isn't all that good. That and they're slower than flying birds.
But in terms of mammals, which biped mammals are faster than predatory mammals?
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:12:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ruin -- unless you were doing the satire thing, in which case I apologize for misinterpreting your post.
:-)
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:11:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ruin:
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*cough*
AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Christ on a crutch...you like, don't really believe that do you?
Oh well.
The Eve theory is highly contested, and in any case she would have lived about 200,000 years ago.
The Savannah Ape Theory is bullshit. Bipedalism likely evolved from postural feeding in the rainforest. We already know what happens to chimps when they go out onto the savannah...they walk on four legs, or knucklewalk. They don't walk bipedally. It's unreasonable to assume our chimp-like ancestors would have behaved differently.
As for the race thing...I'm not touching that with a 10-foot pole.
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:05:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I thought the original post was kind of stupid, but ruin's review actually managed to top it.
Like I told some other clown, if you have to tell people you are funny, you are not.
Submitted by CobraCommander (user info) at 2003-12-23 20:03:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I prefer the big gang-bang theory.
Submitted by ruin (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:55:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
+2 for disagreeing with creationism, a insane view held largely by black american christians and frigid librarian-type middle-aged white snooty christian bitches (the monkey theory probably makes blacks edgy hehehe... don't know why - the ape we DID evolve from had WHITE skin)
-2 for disagreeing for evolutionism, of course we evolved from apes, we evolved from a certain breed of chimpanzee that used to live in trees in east africa but the trees disappeared in that region due to climate change and those chimps had to learn to adapt to living on open plains where very fast meat-eaters could catch them so they had to get smarter and learn how to walk for long distances, hence human uprightness, no other apes evolved this way because it was a VERY secular regional situation that didn't change for millions of years, many different breeds evolved you know, some very different to us, did you know that neanderthals didn't have sweat glands? they just breathed through their gigantic noses and it cooled/warmed the air going into their bodies.
now the particular ape-man that survived long enough to become us had WHITE skin, over time with the loss of body hair became black skin as they were naked and out in the sun all the time.
all humans other than blacks are descended from ONE black woman about 80,000 yrs ago, deal with THAT shit.
i'd say it's a mix of evolutionism and something like oh say god perhaps, some shit like that...
anyway, zero for you...
Submitted by CobraCommander (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:51:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I dunno man, its just like joketelling. Once you have to explain the joke, it sorta loses all of its momentum and falls apart.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:47:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
someone
If it was an attempt at not being serious, you failed.
Instead of a satirical or humor post it came across that you are an idiot.
The fact that you have to TELL US it is not a serious post even show it more so.
Work on your writing skills a bit. Drop the ego and then maybe we can appreciate your attempts at humor.
-Turtle
Submitted by Franger (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:47:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Look at the little fuckspear try to say he was only joking now that hes been ripped a new hole, poor bastard, he's so pathetic.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:46:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
glam daddy im not angry at all. Frusterated more then anything, i tried to prove something
apparently i hadnt thought out well enough to write. I apologize, and again THIS POST IS NOT
SERIOUS
ohh well, back to the drawing board
Submitted by Sunny (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:43:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This post is so full of misinformation I can't even attack it all.
http://www.becominghuman.org/
Try the slideshow there for some...like...science.
One point I took exception with: We did NOT evolve from monkeys. Our ancestors split off from the monkey line roughly 22 million years ago. These creatures were proto-primates, not monkeys. These animals were far more like lemurs than anything else, probably similar to modern Tarsiers.
Read a book.
I recommend: An Introduction to Physical Anthropology by Robert Jurmain.
What Evolution Is by Ernst Mayr and Jared Diamond
Submitted by glam_daddy (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:41:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
someone..
yes i spelled a few words wrong there. I have mentioned in several posts that I spell for shit. But i see your new here so I will let that slide. But for the future... I spell like shit.
There.
Note its not just me that doesnt get your post. so far nobody has. And I was the only one who was rating you positive. Everyone else was 0 or -1. Now sure, I forgot to actually rate you +1 but the thought was there.
Point = direct your misguided anger elsewhere my son.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:40:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HOLY FUCK YOU PEOPLE ARE RETARDED
this is not a serious post. Which is why it contradicts itself, gives no explanation, and is
in no way serious if u actually read it. Man, i thought people had some sort of intelligence
on this site.......
Submitted by Bennywild <Bennywild.at.hotmail.com> at 2003-12-23 19:38:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I don't feel like making this a heated debate, but while I was writing my review, some other reviews got posted. One of which was Someone. Someone said, "this post tries very hard NOT to be serious. Which was my whole point, which is WHY i put no explantions in. But apparently you dont get it, sigh."
Ok brotha. Instead of a -2 for being ignorant, I give you a -1 for bad writing. Peace.
Submitted by Bennywild <Bennywild.at.hotmail.com> at 2003-12-23 19:34:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oy vey. Monkeys (and other animals for that matter) are still evolving. There have been several tests over several generations of several different animals at several different prestigious research universities. Not to mention the vast amount of collective knowledge the scientific community has on DNA and/or mRNA mutation (which can lead to entirely new traits, like, ya know, evolving) which can occur during translation or transcription of the protein. And I'm sure yu would love to tell anybody who has ever had cancer that it definately wasn't the cells mutating (i.e. evolving) in such a way that would cause them to reproduce uncontrollably. That obviously doesn't coencide with evolutionary theory. And we can just ignore the entire industry (which is one of the fastest growing I might add) that engineers DNA. Let's just call that artificial evolution. Or maybe sped up...
The point being, capitalized curse words tied with false statements do not make an arguement sound. Please take your soapbox elsewhere.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"But the totall lack of knowlegde and riddiculus statements totally undermine it."
above is from glam_daddy.(nice spelling dumbass)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
ohh my god, when will the irony stop?
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:29:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
this post tries very hard NOT to be serious. Which was my whole point, which is WHY i put no
explantions in. But apparently you dont get it, sigh.
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:27:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey someone,
Get an education before you ponder things that are well beyond your intelligence level.
Evolution, Creation, and Intelligent Design are the current 3 theories.
I won't bore you with big words BUT I can sum up each.
Creation: God made us
Intelligent Design: God Made us and then let us do whatever.
Evolution: Random Chance made us
Learn to cope with being small.
-Turtle
Submitted by glam_daddy (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:24:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what a croc of uninformed rubble.
no offense.
ok maybe a little offense.
first of all in your explanation of evolutionism you barely even discuss the making of life... you go on and on about how the planet was formed, and the oceans, and then you say:
"and creating more and more evolutions, one of which eventually spawned life"
I wont go into how riddiculus that paragraph was. But you totally glossed over the 1 part that has any significance to the topic at hand.
Then you go on to say that the concept of life being made from 1 cell is Bulshit. No reasoning. No discussion, just that the current beliefe system regarding the creation of life is simply bullshit. No other theories offered.
This post tries very hard to be serious. But the totall lack of knowlegde and riddiculus statements totally undermine it.
No proof of the 1 cell theory? Dude what school did you got to?
I pray for the future.
+1 because at least you tried
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:22:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
wow that was wicked funny method. fucking fag
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:21:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
REC3NTLY I ENTERTANEED MYS3LF WIT LISTENNG 2 DA TH3OREIS OF OUR EXISTANC3 BOTH FROM A CR3ATIONIST AND EVOLUTIONIST VEIWPOINT!!!!11!1 BFORE I BGAN ABOUT TEH FLAWS IN AACH I WIL QUIKLY DESCRIEB WUT HAS B3N 2LD 2 MA
CR3ATIONIST- AN AL POWERFUL GOD DECIEDD 2 CRAAET SOMETHNG IN HIS LIEK IMAEG1!!11 UPON COMPL3TION OF TEH WORLD HA CREAETD ADM A MAN!!1!1! OMG LOL THIS MAN IN HIS MORTAL AND LIMIETD STAET OF MIND SON BCME LONELY!!!1 OMG WTF LOL GOD 2K A RIB FROM ADM AND CR3AETD 3V3 A WOMAN WIT IT WHICH SUPOSADLY IS Y WOMEN HAEV ON3 MOR3 RIB THAN MAN11!!! OMG THEY AV3NTUALY SIN3D IN WHICH TH3Y FEL FROM THERE CONV3RSATION LIEK STAET WIT GOD AND FLASH FORWARD S3VERAL THOUSAND YAARS HARA WE AER!1!!1!
EVOLUTIONIST- A FUSION OF C3RTANE CH3MICALS AND UND3SCRIEBD REACTIONS CRAAETD A CLOUD OF DUST WHICH OV3R SEVERAL MILION (ITS ALWAYS MILIONS FOR AVOLUTION) Y3ARS EVENTUALY FORM3D OUR EARTH!1!1!11! OMG LOL TH3N OVER MANY CHAMICAL CHANG3S AND 3VOLUTIONS ALONG WIT A H3ARTY DOSE OF MATH AND PHYSICS OUR MON SEPARAETD FROM US FORMNG TEH OCAANS AND CRAATNG MOR3 AND MOR3 3VOLUTIONS ONA OF WHICH 3VENTUALY SPAWNED LIEF!11!1!11 WTF LOL MILIONS OF Y3ARS L8R MAN WAS CREAETD R3MEMBR THIS AL HAP3NED BY A SNGLE C3L!!!!1!1
AGANE THIS IS V3RY BREIF AND IT HAS AL B3N FORM3D BY S3VERAL DIFER3NT PERSONS VEIW AND MAH OWN LIMIETD RESAARCH1!1!!! OMG WTF LOL HER3 R MAH R3ASONS Y AACH IS BULSHIT
CRAATIONIST- WITHOUT DIVNG IN2 DA SATURAETD AND HEAVILY ARGUED 2PIC OF RELIGION I WIL QUIKLY POINT OUT SAVARAL PROBLEMS WIT A CREATIONIST VEIWPOINT1!!1!11 OMG WTF FIRST OF IS TEH LAK OF PROF OR AXPLANATION OF RAEC SPECEIS OR DEVALOP3D CHARACTERISTICS (EVOLUTION OBVIOUSLY BUT MORE ON THIS L8R) INST3AD TH3Y TEND 2 THROW BIBLE VERS3S OR CHANGE DA SUBJACT INSTEAD OF ANSWARNG MAH FUKNG QUESTIONS!1!11 OMG WTF LOL TEH OTHAR PROBLEM I HAEV WIT CR3ATION IS Y AN AL POW3RFUL AL KNOWNG GOD WUD CREAET THIS ADM IF TEH DUMB FUKER WUD TURN AROUND AND BTRAY HIM11!1 DOES THIS MAEK SANSE 2 ANYONE???!?!?!?!!!!?!!!!?!!!! WTF MAH ONLY DEF3NSE IN TERMS OF CRAATIONISTS IS GOD WANTED 2 HAEV A GOD TIEM M3ANNG EVEN THOUGH HE NU AL THIS H3 WAS BOR3D AND RILLY DIDNT R ADM WAS GONG 2 B SUCH A FUKTARD11!111 OMG WTF
EVOLUTIONIST- OBVIOUSLY EVOLUTION 2 A LARGA EXTENT IS REAL!111!1 OMG AS DARWIN SADE SURVIVAL OF DA FITEST!!!11!1! THIS IS DA EXPLANATION OF RAEC OF SPECEIS OF LEARN3D CHARACT3RISTICS11!1! WTF LOL WE EVOLVA 2 AN AXT3NT 2 OUR ENVIRONM3NT AND OUR SITUATIONS1!1!111! OMG WTF HOWAV3R THEIR R SOMA THNGS TAHT DONT AD UP1!!!1!1 OMG FIRST IF AN EVOLUTIONIST WANTS ME 2 BLEIVE IM TYPNG THIS AT THIS VERY MOM3NT IN DA COMFORT OF THIS HOUS3 SMOKNG A PLANT TAHT GETS MAH HIGH B/C OF A SNGLE CH3MICAL R3ACTION SO R AND IMPOSIBLA ADVANC3D MATH CANT EVEN BGAN 2 CALCULAET TEH PROBABILITEIS WAL IM CALNG BULSHIT1!!1 OMG AN EVOLUTIONIST MUST THAN BLEIVE IN AXTR8RRASTRIAL LIEF AND ENTIERLY IN CHANC3 AS OPOSAD 2 FAET OR FATEH PROVIDNG THEY R STAYNG TRU3 2 THEYRE BLEIFS1!!1!1 WTF LOL ALSO 2 SAY I CMA FROM A MONKEY IS PURA PUR3 BULSHIT11111111 OMG WTF THERE HAS NOT BEN ANY R3AL PROF 2 THIS THEORY AND SAYNG TAHT B/C THEY R SIMILAR BHAVIOR AND INTALIEGNC3 2 A HUMAN DOES NOT MAAN WA CM3 FROM MONKEYS!!1! WTF IF THIS IS TEH CAES TH3N WE R THEY STIL NOT EVOLVNG?!!!?!! WH3N DID CHANCA SAY ENOUGH MONKEYS MUST S2P 3VOLVNG IN2 HUMANS AND MUST RAMANE CONSTANT??!!?!!!! OMG WTF LOL
IN CONCLUSION MAH CURANT THEORY ON LIEF IS PAOPLE SP3ND WAY 2 MUCH TIEM ARGUNG WHO IS RIGHT OR WRONG WHO IS GONG 2 BURN IN HAL WHO IS GONG 2 B REINCARNAETD OR APROXIMAETLY WHEN IN DA 70 MILION YAARS OF EVOLUTION W3 CM3 2 CHANGE IN2 HUMANS!11! WTF DA TRUTH IS NO ON3 RILLY KNOWS1!!!!! LOL WA R PLAYNG A GU3SNG GMA ABOUT WHO IS WRONG AND RIGHT AND FOR SOME P3OPLE IT CONSUMES THEYRE WHOL3 LIEF111! OMG U WIL KNOW WHAN U DEI MAH ONLY WARNNG IS U BTER B SUR3 TAHT WHEN UR READY 2 GO U BTAR HOPE TAHT U R RIGHT1!1!11! LOL UNTIL THAN IM SAYNG FUK AL THAS3 THEOREIS AND SCR3MNG BULSHIT1!!1 OMG LOL
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2003-12-23 19:15:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
sorry, but the jar of apple sauce lied to you, try sugar.