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No Thank You, I'm On Atkins (401 hits)

Category: None

Rating: -2 on 1 review (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by <alm66875.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-01-14 22:14:30 EST


I've visited uber a lot lately and read a lot of posts, but I have never posted anything of my own (you guys are pretty intimidating...) But, I decided that its about time, so here goes....

A few weeks ago, I went out to lunch at the olive garden with a few friends. When our salad and breadsticks arrived, I couldn't help but notice that one friend wasn't touching her appetizer. So, I asked her why. (a HUGE mistake.)

ME: Kara, don't you want any salad?

HER: No, I have to watch my carbs; I'm on Atkin's.

ME: ...

She then launched into a long winded explanation about her new diet , how evil carbs are, and how its only a matter of time until I balloon up out of control because of my own pasta consumption.

Uh Oh, I begin to think; another friend has sold her soul to the satan of fad diets, Dr. Atkins. What sets the Atkin's diet apart from other diets is the fact that everyone following it feels the need to ramble on incessantly about their new regimen.

I can think of four people that I know who have been lured into the clutches of Dr. Atkins and been brainwashed into following his diabolical dietary scheme. Each of them has told me more than I'll ever need (or want) to know about their diet. Keep in mind that NONE of these people even remotely need to go on a diet.

So, why torture yourselves, America? Just to be a part of a growing fad? I KNOW that over one third of America is overweight, but that also means that two thirds are NOT overweight, so why does EVERYBODY feel the need to starve themselves. Forget dieting... pass me the food.

^Amy^


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User Reviews


Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-01-14 22:32:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

I spy, with my little eye, YOU GETTING SHOT IN THE FACE.


Second class? What about Social Security, bus discounts, Medic-Alert
jewelery, Gold Bond powder, pants all the way up to your armpits, and
all those other senior perks? Oh, if you ask me, old folks have it
pretty sweet.

-- Homer Simpson
Raging Abe Simpson and His Grumbling Grandson in
"The Curse of the Flying Hellfish"