Tribute (532 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.5 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by squattail (View user info) at 2004-01-21 18:21:02 EST
Goatse man, the following is a tribute to you:
Google might classify you as Society > Religion and Spirituality > ... > Scientology, but to me you will never be branded as anything. You are a free spirit, not limited by the laws of biological elasticity. You taught millions to laugh again, and for that I am in your debt. And then, one day, I visit your site again. MSN search says is cannot find "goatse.cx", and that was when I knew something was wrong. This was far worse than any simple bandwidth excess, this was terminal. Then I discovered the domain was suspended. You were a vital part of the internet, and you were stolen from us. I signed the petition
http://www.petitiononline.com/Goatse/petition.html
under a dozen different names, and yet I know it is hopeless. There will be mirrors of course, but to me, the day goatse.cx was taken down was the day the internet died.
Your cheerful little greeting, hello.jpg, always made me laugh whenever I thought about it. I even loaded it up as background to an entire lab of university computers, just to spread the word. But I could never spread this image as far as your stretched your distended anus. I didn't have the courage. And now it is all over.
Mr Bob Goatse, I have rewritten the lyrics to a horribly unpopular song, and will one day record it and give the profits to your trust fund. Here is a small sample, I hope you like it:
Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can stretch wider, legs spread eagle,
for you are the lube around my ring.
Just as the apostles sat around waiting for the return of Christ, I will wait for you. I will wait for you....like a stone....
User Reviews
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-07-13 00:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-07-08 07:27:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by yeahiamghos <ghoshoyt.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-02-29 20:00:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I want the goatse back. WEENT WEENT PLUG PLUG
Submitted by TaK (user info) at 2004-01-21 21:05:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck. You.
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-01-21 20:05:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You rank me -2 just because you know me. What is your fucking point?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-01-21 19:59:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
And that proves my point on internet cliques. Ranking +2 just because you know the guy...wow you're smart.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-01-21 19:45:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-01-21 19:10:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hm..............................I'm uninspired for some reason, but +2 because you're squattie :)
Submitted by Cassiopeia (user info) at 2004-01-21 18:49:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF I'M NOT READING ALL THAT
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-01-21 18:26:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The picture has been around on newsgroups and forums on the internet forever, but the domain was only registered 1999.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-01-21 18:24:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i think it was longer than 1999.