How should I dump my girlfriend? (1761 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.73 on 28 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by derek coburn <blindchunk.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-01-25 20:12:24 EST
Now I am quite a pussy when it comes to dumping women. I have never done it, but I plan to tommorow and it will be a good decision by me. I just want some advice about how to do it...like more or less what I should say to her. I'd prefer to not have her hate me afterwords if possible, so if I could have your imput it would be nice.
thanks
User Reviews
Submitted by Jambo (user info) at 2004-01-26 18:30:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-01-26 18:15:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
pee in her butt. it worked great for a guy i know.
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This buddy of mine pee'd on his girlfriends face, when she was blowing him...TWICE! They stayed together for 3 years after that. Oh yeah, she didn't ask either.
Fuck her best friend if you really want her to hate you. Or if you're the extremist...you could kill her dog, while she's tied up in a chair, then you can masterbate on the dead dog, and rub the dog on her face. Now THAT...is fucked up.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-01-26 18:15:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
pee in her butt. it worked great for a guy i know.
Submitted by JinkyWilliams (user info) at 2004-01-26 18:14:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd first ask what the reasons are for your desire to break up with her.
Then I'd work from there.
Stay orange.
--JW
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-01-26 18:10:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
be honest
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2004-01-26 16:03:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
**like more or less what I should say to her**
You should say 'I know it was you Fredo, you broke my heart.' And then give her a big kiss, row her out into the middle of the lake and shoot her in the back of the head.
And when you're done, don't forget to leave the gun, and take the cannolis.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2004-01-25 23:36:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Don't listen to any of these posts. None of them are giving you any quality information. Except for the ones that recommend killing yourself. Those you should listen to. She's eventually going to catch you sniffing her mother's panties and break it off with you anyway, if you just want to wait. Dickhole.
Submitted by Despiadado (user info) at 2004-01-25 23:20:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You should right it in a note, and drive off a cliff.
Submitted by hendrixjrr (user info) at 2004-01-25 23:11:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree with tom.
Submitted by Lisa at 2004-01-25 22:41:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
End it by killing yourself.
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-01-25 22:26:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
c'mon people, the post itself may suck but it leaves so much to everyone else to say! this is a goldmine for sarcastic comments and hilarious advice/reviews. i'm not sure what exactly i'm talking about, but i think i made myself clear.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-01-25 22:18:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.stupidteenforum.com/pussies
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-01-25 22:10:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:13:01 (#)
Show her this post. Then she'll realize that you suck at life and dump you.
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Best answer of the bunch.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:44:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
She's crying for joy.
We have a date Wednesday night, does she prefer roses or tulips?
Submitted by Murphy1844 (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:43:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Send her a text message: Its over between u & me.
Submitted by PolPot (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:41:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Just ignore her until she gets the message
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:40:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
concurs with ashlee
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:13:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Show her this post. Then she'll realize that you suck at life and dump you.
Submitted by BoxcarChild (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:12:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
**UPDATE: Yeah i dumpped her, she is crying etc.
Submitted by fingerbang (user info) at 2004-01-25 21:05:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Over the years, i have become the master at breaking up with girls. Here is my advice. Try to fuck her best friend.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:53:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Stop being such a pussy and call her right now, don't wait.
Submitted by j0andre1 (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:39:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Step 1, the break-up -
act sincere
act like it's very hard for you to do
act like you're holding back tears
Step 2 -
Call her 3 days later to see how she's doing
She'll sound sad
Ask if she wants you to come over for a little bit, she'll say yes
Step 3 - have sex with her for another week..
Step 4 - start over at step 1
unless she's asked if you're "back together" you're free to do whatever you want on the side...
tell her I said it was ok
Or just do step 1, I don't care...
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:32:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Be totally honest...tell her that she deserves to be fucked by a fat biker, then give her my number.
Submitted by critical_condition (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:25:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Tell her you have an elderly fetish and you want to have a threesome with her, her mother, and her grandmother.
Oh, and quit fucking whining.
Submitted by Cicciro (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:25:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Better yet... just walk up to her with a gun in hand and shoot yourself. That way she will know your dead. Have her post something about it here so we can rejoice as well.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:22:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Flower shop, perhaps.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:21:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
In a trash can.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:21:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's what I would do:
1) Cry a little bit
2) Stop crying and make some lunch
3) Cry while you eat
4) Stop crying, get in the car, and go to a flower shot
5) Buy a rose (crying while you do it can add affect)
6) Drive to her home
7) Give it to her
8) Tell her that you are calling it off (make sure a tear or two for good measure)
9) Drive home
10) Have a huge party back at your house
Submitted by vergedor (user info) at 2004-01-25 20:13:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Just look her in the eyes and tell her without any emotion that she should consider you dead.