My friend Charlie (516 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.4 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by danifest mestiny (View user info) at 2004-02-13 14:35:31 EST
Ah, Berkeley in the springtime. It was a warm sunny day, perfect for walking Telegraph and haggling with the street merchants and chatting up a few bums.
Charlie was the biggest, blackest, blindest man I can ever remember seeing and he was standing at the corner of Telegraph and Durant pleading with anyone passing by to help him out. While a woman selling bead necklaces and wristbands had my sister's attention I figured I'd play good Samaritan and walked over to ask him what the matter was.
"I need to get to Tower Records. Can you help me find it?"
"Sure, it's only half a block down the road, I'll walk you there myself."
Light turns green.
I say to him, "Okay, light's green, watch the curb now."
"Thanks so much, my name is Charlie, what's your name?"
"I'm Dan, Charlie, it's nice to meet you."
"Likewise, young man."
We approach the opposite curb and then something bad happens. Something very bad. I forget Charlie is blind. I forget to say "Watch the curb." Charlie falls. Charlie falls HARD. I'm frozen. I just tripped a blind man. People are staring, I help Charlie up, stuttering, stammering:
"I-I-I so sorry. Sorry. So sorry."
Charlie just smiles, "Don't worry, Dan, don't worry. Not the first time I've fallen down anyways." Then Charlie notices the end of his cane had broken off.
"Dan do me a favor and try to find the piece that just snapped off."
"Y-y-yeah sure. Uh, um," glancing around at the ground I realize I have no clue what I'm searching for. "Charlie what does the end of the cane look like?"
FUCK.
And Charlie laughed.
User Reviews
Submitted by tardbacon (user info) at 2004-02-14 20:21:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
not many things as pitiful as a blind guy with a broken cane... well, besides most of the bums in berkeley...
Submitted by seansdementia (user info) at 2004-02-14 00:12:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
damn..
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-02-13 19:13:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i watched a blind girl walk into a door jamb once. i thought the dog was going to stop her.
man i felt like a dick.
Submitted by danifestmestiny (user info) at 2004-02-13 17:20:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
side note: my alternate title was "I'm ready to tell you my secret now... I trip blind people." a la the "I see dead people" exchange in The Sixth Sense.
Submitted by Anjie (user info) at 2004-02-13 15:52:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cracked me up!
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:45:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was "hook me up" funny.
Submitted by JackHand (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:45:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
o... heh heh
oops
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:44:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHA! The end of his cane! I get it!
Cane can be a slang term for PENIS!
Unaware, he was asking him what the end of his PENIS looks like!
HAHAHAHAHA...
-Sideburns
Submitted by JackHand (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:41:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
It seems like this story was cut short...
Next time think about baseball and try to hold out longer for OUR pleasure.
Submitted by amusediniraq (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:38:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was funny.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-02-13 14:38:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't get the ending.