Uberia Fanfare chapter 1- Enter the Zone (1511 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1.78 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mac (View user info) at 2004-03-03 10:42:10 EST
Insipered by Uberia
Chapter list- http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?user_id=5014
This chapter is dedicated to WillZone- http://www.ubersite.com/m/26830#407485
Rizzo shook his head in disbelief. He surveyed the room looking for a hint of hope in the eyes of his companions. He would find none. As Maddox continued with his battle plans the words became nothing more than incomprehensible muffled sounds as Rizzo began to lose hope in himself. "This is insane. We'll never make it" he thought. It was just then that in the corner of his eye, he spotted Loki as she placed her hand on EdDee's shoulder to calm his nervous shaking. Rizzo swelled with pride after witnessing such a kind act, and his worries disappeared. His new found enthusiasm exuded from his being, giving off a positive energy that quickly spread through the room as Maddox continued explaining his plan "then after Rizzo and JMG114 have formatted the drivers, Loki and Dlove will pair up to infiltrate the..."
"Not necessary!" shouted a strange figure as he emerged from the shadows. The warriors and adventurers alike were in awe as a man in a bright shimmering costume made of the finest silks, adorned with gold and silver buttons and a long, flowing cape, studded with a thousand rubies walked into the room.
"You forgot one thing when making your plan, dear Maddox. You forgot to account for me, the great and powerful WillZone!" the stranger offered as he threw back his cape, exposing a large, diamond encrusted "Z" on his chest. The adventurers and warriors greeted the man with blank stares is they were unimpressed by his show. Dlove clutched a throwing star and eagerly awaited a signal from his master to end this boastful fool's life. No such signal would come as Maddox puffed on his cigar as he watched in disbelief as the stranger continued his little show.
"I am the great WillZone! Known to most as Zone and to others as the Whiz...and a few times I've been called Big Poppa, if you know what I mean, ha ha." he explained as he drew his sword. He began swinging his sword around in the air as he boasted of his accomplishments "I am the greatest swordsman in all of Cyber. I have bested the best of the best and even the better of the bestest." He jumped up on the table and began slashing his sword in the air as he continued once again to brag of himself "I and I alone will defeat KoolMang and the Triad, then you can worship me as I deserve to be worshiped".
He smiled widely then did a full summersault off the table with a perfect landing. He stood there with his arms out. For several seconds everyone stared at straight ahead with out blinking as they were so unimpressed with his display of pompous bravado they were speechless. Then as he stood before them, arms raised, smile ear to ear, a blood stain began to form on his chest. The stain became darker and larger over the next few seconds finally he dropped dead before them. Thud. As it seemed, he landed on his sword. It went straight into his back side and up the middle.
"Well...you don't see that everyday" said Maddox as he flicked out his cigar. "Now where was I..."
User Reviews
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-03-05 04:48:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't believe I missed this.
Submitted by Yes at 2004-03-03 23:38:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This site rocks it is so much better than uber pulp! Its better than masterbating into a warm cup of cookie dough! Its better than punching a new born baby kitten square in the face! Its better than telling your boss "suck your own cock for a change" or "does my mouth look like a toilet bowl?" Its better than....than.....no wait its gay and your all fags! http://www.geocities.com/captain_foamy
Submitted by Buttons (user info) at 2004-03-03 18:22:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis close, Mac. Really. Ok, maybe a bit farther than that.
Submitted by Mac (user info) at 2004-03-03 18:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Buttons,
You know I don't shit about computers. I tried my best to fake it though... I failed, didn't I?
Submitted by Buttons (user info) at 2004-03-03 17:50:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heh - this, ladies and gents, is what we call "comic relief," Mac's forte.
Oh ,and Mac, "then after Rizzo and JMG114 have formatted the drivers"? Leave the tech stuff to LOTP, eh? (Obviously, NOT Mac's forte. ;)
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-03-03 17:18:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-03-03 16:08:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha, there ya go.
Submitted by LaNa (user info) at 2004-03-03 15:17:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
...but wait... Will is a comedian so it was fake blood - right? Right? RIGHT? He's ... not... really... dead ... is he? *sob*
What a cruel cruel world
I'll never let go Will... I'll never let go
~LaNa
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2004-03-03 14:07:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey! I made it into a story.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2004-03-03 13:31:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Mac, you don't deserve that -2, I'm sorry.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2004-03-03 13:25:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/26861
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-03-03 13:23:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Amen!
I can only hope that my ghost will continue to haunt Maddox.
a Happy Will Zone
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2004-03-03 13:07:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
woohoo!
Submitted by Mac (user info) at 2004-03-03 12:36:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
PMJ,
Got it. Don't worry, you'll have your own Fanfare chapter that hopefully will catch the attention of LOTP.
seanfogy,
A dancing starfish, eh? I can work with that.
Submitted by Mac (user info) at 2004-03-03 12:35:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
reallybored,
I wanted to say something about Zone being a chuancey, but I just couldn't. I didn't want this to come off as a WillZone hate post, it isn't. It's a "deflate Zone's ego" post. I felt like calling him a chauncey would straddle the line of hate post too closely. But I should have said something about jedi pimps. I'm sorry, in that aspect, I've failed you and most importantly, myself. *swallows poison*
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-03-03 12:32:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's hard to +2 a Mac post without at least a passing mention of chaunceys or jedi-pimps. But i will do it anyway.
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2004-03-03 12:25:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Since I'm not cool enough to make it to the real Uber saga, can you make me a dancing starfish in yours? I'll give you a nickel and be your friend.
Submitted by lordofthepost (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:37:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh this is great, kinda wish you didn't kill him off ya know? I would have had him make some quick cameo appearance during the battle scenes, kinda rushing in like the incredibly special hulk, swing his sword around at some trees, then run off every now and then.. but this was good.
Willzone what do you think, was this worthy?
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:33:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Err... my bad dude. What I should have said is that I hope to make it into uber related stories in general (although I only read Uberia when it comes to chapter stories). If I do make it into yours, LotP's or anyone elses (I made a streetpunk story which kicked butt), well then, cool. However, if I don't make it to any, then oh well.
Right now, I think getting into Uberia would be my biggest hope, but it's all good.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:31:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hee, hee, snigger, snigger.
Submitted by Mac (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:25:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
PMJ,
I'm confused. You hope you make into the real Uberia by the actual LOTP, or you hope you make it into my fanfare Uberia, which I already told I was going to put you in? Just curious here.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:23:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wooooo, ole!
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:17:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That would be pretty cool and I appreciate the complement. I'm happy just reading the story. If I make it in, cheers, if I don't, oh well.
Submitted by Mac (user info) at 2004-03-03 11:04:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
PMJ,
I think the next one will be- "Uberia Fanfare Chapter 2: Warning- PotatoManJack is fuckin way scary awesome tough" Whatta ya think?
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-03-03 10:50:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHA!!!
Good shit, Mac. Good shit.