Old People Humor and tendencies (1021 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.16 on 13 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Krystal <imtheluckystar.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-03-03 19:55:23 EST
Every bored retired old person that doesn't work at McDonald's i SWEAR gets their real estate license, just to bug me.....
Case in Point:
There are two FOUR very old people that work in my office..... They have no technical skills, are practically deaf, and always go on and on about how old they are and how they sell old homes in old cities for other old annoying people....
Exhibit A: Lets call her 'Jackie'
Jackie is pretty much the most annoying woman EVER. She is very old and short, but has big annoying lips like a black person, and she puts her old lady shade of orange lipstick all over... i think her lips are so big, she goes thru a lipstick tube every 6 days.... oh, to get on with it... she has no idea what to do with a computer... she even embarassed ME when she called the computer 'the brain' in front of our visiting tech guy.... he was a little freaked out.. oh yeah, so i am trying to show her the SIMPLE method of copy-and-paste from google to word... EASY EASY EASY
she does NOT get it. she keeps asking questions, everytime i open my mouth to answer, she goes "huh??" with her old lady deafness... i would like to tell her that if maybe she would stop broadcasting how old and deaf she is, i MIGHT be able to form a word before she cuts me off.... "you're not deaf jackie, i just haven't had a chance to answer you yet..." she's the one at the office meeting who always has an example of every situation addressed, a comment or question for every statement... and an opinion of everything ever... she always tries to say funny things but ends up looking dumb. "look jackie, maybe that worked in the 1920's, but that shit don't fly here"
one time i was reading a book, and she was all, "oh i read a book once, it was how Krystal got murdered" ha....ha...? was that supposed to be funny? was it a real book and she was mentioning coincidences?? does she need to be taken back to the Home??
Exhibit B: 'Quintin'
Quintin is also very old and short and annoying in his own special way, children.
he wears his orthopedic shoes and always has some sort of medical ailment or another. the other day he came to the office meeting with a motherfucking bloody tissue sticking out of his ear.. his explanation..? His head was bleeding... oh, ok then. OH WAIT IF MY HEAD WAS BLEEDING I'D GO TO THE ER, NOT WORK.... does he not think we will all find the fact that he has an oozy cranium gross.. what if he coughs and the tissue flies out and into my mouth or something. i'd barf and die and ....ooooo i'm getting dry heaves thinking about it..
i sent him an Email to tell him he never paid his office dues, so he owes $70 in the form of a check.. he says he'll be getting it to me soon. 'soon' turned out to be 6 minutes later when he FAXED me a check for $70. He thought since it was a COLOR fax, it would be OK. can you just see going to the bank with some check on copy paper with ragged edges bc you cut it out of a fax? OMG seriously, WTF is that all about?
He always comes in and starts going thru my shit 'oh i was looking for a paper pad' ummm that's probably in the supply cabinet, not my purse.. don't make me get the cattle prod!
There are two more, but now as i finish these two, there's no need to go on.. you SEE what i deal with.
i can't believe he faxed me a fuckin check
User Reviews
Submitted by lilbill87 (user info) at 2004-05-17 18:02:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Mollification (user info) at 2004-04-03 01:20:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Fleadh (user info) at 2004-03-04 07:17:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nope mike, Thats where I stopped as well. I did scan down a few lines after but it doesnt get any better. Pity cos it had potential.
C
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2004-03-04 01:17:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I got this far:
"Exhibit A: Lets call her 'Jackie'
Jackie is pretty much the most annoying woman EVER. She is very old and short, but has big annoying lips like a black person"
Anybody get farther?
Submitted by moose74 (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:48:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
There's good content here which could be developed into a decent post. However, you need to expand your ideas and for the love of god, use capital letters and punctuation.
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:34:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Please stop.
Submitted by fingerbang (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:12:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
pllllluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuus 2 because i'm retarded
Submitted by Heimdallsman (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:09:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Okay, I'll leave you to the animals.
Don't say I didn't warn you.
--HeimdallsMan
Submitted by Luckystar (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:07:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
well, I'm at work
and i have nothing better to do...
and this stuff keeps bugging me
so shut up
don't read it if you don't like it
Submitted by Heimdallsman (user info) at 2004-03-03 20:00:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
You are stretching my patience, Krystal.
Please quit with the OMGs, please punctuate, please only post once per day.
I -2 so rarely... won't you stop and think of me before you post again?
--HeimdallsMan
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-03-03 19:59:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I'll give you head
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-03-03 19:58:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Bart please unban me.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-03-03 19:56:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
One post per day, twat. Im not reading this shit.