Where is the love? (A happier Uber compilation) (2097 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.89 on 35 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (View user info) at 2004-03-06 20:04:58 EST
There are a whole lot of -2 collections posted around Uber, but how come there are no +2 collections? Well, uberusers, it is because there is far more hate floating around this little corner of the Internet than love. In the interest of spreading affection for one another, I present to you a collection of some of the more amusing plus two reviews I have found here. Most of them are recent, some of them are older, some of them made sense within the context of the post, and many did not.
I didn't put as many reviews in here as one might find in a negative two post because for some reason, the plus twos you all have produced tend to be of a lesser caliber than negative twos. Again, why does everyone put so much more effort into their hatred than their appreciation? So, enjoy, and I hope this convinces some of you to spread your love a little bit more liberally.
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Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-02-23 16:06:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmm, i wonder what the first thing a woman notices about me?...
///insert strange wavy girl thinking sequence///
Girl - "Damn that kid has one big ass."
Girl2 - "You know what they say. You need a big hammer, to move a big nail."
Girl - "What in the hell are you talking about."
///end strange wavy girl thinking sequence///
Yep.
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Submitted by UberUser (user info) at 2004-03-01 23:41:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
McGuddah is like a 2 dollar whore and you, squirrel, lsm, and everyone else got her all loose and stuff for MickGinny to come in and blow the final load all over this bad chicken.
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Submitted by neomage (user info) at 2004-03-03 21:38:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
I couldn't stop laughing. I don't know why, there wasn't anything funny, it was just..... damn voodoo! WITCH!
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Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2004-02-23 11:19:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Broken hearts taste bitter.
Thats why you should stir fry them in rum before you eat.
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Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-02-23 17:04:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
I once fingered a girl while she was pissing.
It made her stop pissing immediately.
I kept pushing my finger in and out and the piss would stop and start.
Then I gave her a pearl necklace.
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Submitted by enraged_baboon (user info) at 2004-02-25 13:08:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
this post made me cry - and not with laughter. i broke down in tears of sorrow because now i know someone on earth is more awesome than myself. this is literally not fair. what happened to MY needs? why can't you accommodate MY feelings? i guess i'll have to Deal With It? FUCK YOU.
P.S. you are awesome.
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Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-02-29 08:49:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Christ, hasn't anyone ever read a book before?? No, continuige isn't a word. If it was, you would have spelled it incorrectly, because that noun form takes an -age, not an -ige. The word is continuation.
Words I've seen in the last couple days:
conspicious (instead of conspicuous, and it wasn't just a typo)
delisciocus (delicious?)
exemplarary (thanks to the pres for that one)
antagonate (a new golf club alloy material I think)
Read more often, you illiterit fucks! Yes, that was intentional, you morronic fucks! Yes, that was intentional. Fucks.
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Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-03-06 04:53:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
if i watch the hair on my legs really close, they start to dance
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Submitted by TaK (user info) at 2004-02-05 20:21:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep going...don't stop...yea, like that...
Oh shit, what am I doing I'm on Uber!!
Um, yea...um...I'm liking the story?...yea that's it, I'm liking the story!
And...it's full of...er...good...stuff.
Seriously:
Loving it. The story I mean.
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Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-02-21 16:21:18 (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm the white sex ninja.
you do not want to have a black sex ninja vs. white sex ninja "swordfight" with me. the white sex ninja always triumphs. at least that's what the ladies say....
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Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2004-02-11 21:36:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have always thought Cupid's buns looked like two puppies fighting under a blanket.
What?
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Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-02-13 09:05:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
brace yourself for a deluge of plus 2's shandy.
but they will be just a precursor to the army of adoring pink cunts that will soon be oozing your way.
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Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-02-17 03:22:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
The moral of the story...
I wish the cat had died. Cats suck.
Nope, that's not a moral. Let me try again...
Don't aim for a head when tossing a cat out of the window. They only make a good splat when there's a slab of concrete cushioning their fall.
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Submitted by loki (user info) at 2003-11-21 09:15:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
What are you, blind? It's a cock! It's not a rocket, you sick fuck! It's a cock! Look. It's a cock and balls! A dick! Chorizo and the huevos! It's a big stiffy! It's a penis! Penis maximus! A willie! A weenie! Mr. Jiggle Daddy! The one-eyed wonder weasel! Don't you see that? It's Jimmy and the twins. Rumple Foreskin. He made this. It's made from dil-dough.
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Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-01-13 20:11:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
pie is great... won't you have my babies? i wanna have a billion pooper doing robot babies. yessireebob.
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Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2003-10-10 10:54:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Insane : that just made me laugh so hard a little bit of poo came out.
Of my ear.
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Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2004-02-22 11:44:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't say you float my boat, Hair, but I wouldn't mind if you docked in my harbor, sailed the C, navigated my Netherlands. I hope you like fish.
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Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-10-10 10:48:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
Sometimes we scare ourselves, Tuts.
Beneath our stone cold facade of chauvinism and manliness lie young, kind, innocent boys who only want to be loved...
by whores, murderers, rapists, prison inmates, Charles Manson and most importantly, Satan.
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Now, I command thee, go and love thy uber brothers and sisters.
On a side note, my dog owns.
User Reviews
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-11-16 15:30:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'll be your dog,(hooch) and you can be the collie from turner and hooch.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-04-12 03:35:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that just made me laugh so hard a little bit of poo came out.
Of my ear.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-04-01 20:53:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Blam!
Submitted by ThatOneGirl (user info) at 2004-03-10 21:32:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The love.... I can feel it coming at me.... in waves.
Or maybe that's just the atomic bomb they're testing down the street.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-03-08 01:08:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For someone so.....young
For someone so.....new
For someone so.....beautiful
For someone so.....short
You kick arse grrrl.
Submitted by hcp28 (user info) at 2004-03-08 00:33:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
will you marry me? I know your a little young but still I'm going to be a doctor one day.
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-03-07 19:45:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i was writing something in reply to this post in this rating but then i deleted it because the sheer awesomeness had nothing to do with anything and i stopped making sense a long time ago.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-03-07 11:12:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yup, that was Death to Smoochy. I have no idea what prompted me to respond with that, but it is an awesome flick.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-03-07 10:46:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Loki's comment was from the movie Death to Smoochy. Rainbow Randolph replaces the normal cookies that were in Smoochy's cookie bag with cockNballs cookies, in hopes that Smoochy will lose his kids show. When Smoochy plays it off, and tells the kids that they're rocket ships, Randolph runs out on the set and says what loki typed.
Very funny movie. If you've never seen it, do it!
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-03-07 10:30:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. What the hell was loki talkin about?!?!
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-03-07 06:50:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-03-07 04:03:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice post. By the way, Falco, it was the Bloodhound Gang's 'Bad Touch'. Jeez, I really need to get a life.
Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2004-03-07 03:43:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was like an injection of NutraSweet into my eyeball. The NutraSweet of Love.
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-03-07 03:32:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Papajoe (user info) at 2004-03-07 01:46:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have this notion that the motion of your ocean meets small craft advisery.
I know I heard that somewhere, but I'll be damned if I remember where.
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Bloodhound Gang - the bad touch
Submitted by MistressSarah (user info) at 2004-03-07 03:20:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Papajoe (user info) at 2004-03-07 01:46:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have this notion that the motion of your ocean meets small craft advisery.
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This sailor thanks you for the best pickup line ever.
Submitted by moebius (user info) at 2004-03-07 02:33:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
In the booty now!
Submitted by Papajoe (user info) at 2004-03-07 01:46:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have this notion that the motion of your ocean meets small craft advisery.
I know I heard that somewhere, but I'll be damned if I remember where.
Submitted by intellismartness (user info) at 2004-03-07 00:03:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Trying to come up with something creative... failing... failing... failed.
Great idea though
Submitted by Kracka (user info) at 2004-03-06 23:25:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ohlooka+2
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-03-06 23:14:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmmm.... I guess I don't give out as many +2s as I think I do
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-03-06 22:14:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, one of them was a quote from death to smoochie, from that random cookie scene, loki's I think. I had to include it because that movie is strangely brilliant.
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2004-03-06 22:06:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Lisa's was a quote from Death to Smoochy, I think
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-03-06 22:05:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd jack off on it's face.
Werd.
Submitted by fionavar (user info) at 2004-03-06 22:04:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Tip to Uber-users on how to be hit upon by a 17 year old Squirrel:
Be sure to compliment her on her non-rabid nature.
<wink>
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-03-06 22:00:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sheesh people, both the hat and the dog are female.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-03-06 21:54:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ITS A HAT!! AND HES WEARING A DOG!!!
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-03-06 21:20:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
IT'S A DOG!!!! AND HE'S WEARING A HAT!!!!!
Submitted by K.M (user info) at 2004-03-06 21:20:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-03-06 21:18:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"That's right everyone, come to uber and 17 year old girl will hit on you..."
Thats what I've been counting on, instead of having an actual life.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:54:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good idea. Here's a +2 for it.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:35:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks fionavar, I checked it.
::wink::
Did I just hit on you?
Maybe.
That's right everyone, come to uber and 17 year old girl will hit on you...
Submitted by squanky (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:27:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
couldnt quite get through all that reading but heres my +2 love.
and ur dog is such a fuckin pimp. im sure it gets all the bitches.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:26:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This rules.
Insane and I and shandy/pickle all appear. I miss insane.
Submitted by fionavar (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:23:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the tango would be too advanced for novice hair-dancing. Better to start off with "The Hustle 101".
Thanks Squirrel, great collection.
P.S. check your excite email.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-03-06 20:13:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The hairs on my leg are doing the macarena right now.
I wonder if I can make them do the tango.