Whiskey or penis? (590 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: -0.8 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Anthony <frogglywoggly.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-03-11 13:59:14 EST
Last week, I was in a bar in Brighton, happily whiling away my evening (after my last post where i got about 627 -2s for being drunk in the story, i'll just state for the record that i was sober here). You all know what beer does to the bladder, so needless to say i was soon in the bathroom. As I stood at the urinal, i looked around for something to read while i relieved myself. Usually ther's a poster or something, but in this bar there was just a blank wall, so i started reading what was written on the condom machine. That's when i noticed something wasn't quite right.
Among the flavours available were: Whiskey, Rum, Lager & Lime, and red or white wine.
Now, whiskey tastes bad enough when you drink it from a glass, so imagine what it would be like to feel like you were drinking it from someone's cock.
I think i'd actually rather suck on someone's hairy sweaty balls or choke on a mouthful of hot, creamy cum than smoke a bone that tasted like either whiskey or beer. I certainly don't wish alcoholic condoms on my girlfriend (not that i have one, so let's just say that i wouldn't even wish something like that on any of the horse-banging skanks you find all over the south of England.
I leave you with this true story:
Advertised on a condom machine in the Tennants Arms, Kilnsey, Yorkshire:
"Malt Whiskey flavoured condoms"
and in the small print at the bottom
"Do not drive while using this product"
User Reviews
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-03-11 21:00:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by LacyFace16 (user info) at 2004-03-11 16:20:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
i wouldn't like those flavors so i get your point but the whole creamy cum drink threw me off.
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-03-11 16:03:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I think i'd actually rather suck on someone's hairy sweaty balls or choke on a mouthful of hot, creamy cum than smoke a bone that tasted like either whiskey or beer. I certainly don't wish alcoholic condoms on my girlfriend (not that i have one, so let's just say that i wouldn't even wish something like that on any of the horse-banging skanks you find all over the south of England.
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Youd rather drink cum then taste beer? Are you a fag?
Submitted by rbdweasel (user info) at 2004-03-11 14:39:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Pretty funny stuff. Though I've heard English food is pretty rancid so whisky condomns aren't too shocking.
What a coincidence, I live in Brighton. Unfortunately it is Brighton, Michigan which is a former crappy rural hick town that a bunch of right-wing upper-middle class wretches moved to and now chain restaurants are desparately trying to overdevelop to meet demand. So I guess it really has nothing at all to do with your post. Sorry.
Anyhow, I like your stories. Keep it up.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2004-03-11 14:01:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Youre English so obviously you couldnt handle a mans drink like whisky. Wait, reading that back it implies I suck cock...Damnit!