A Friend Turns Creepy : Part 1 (583 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: -1.35 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by cnympho247 (View user info) at 2004-03-29 14:58:01 EST
One night, my boyfriend and I decided to go to a Teek (sp?) party to meet up with my old friend Steve. We were having a nice time keeping the couch warm and mainlining Jungle Juice. Of course, I figured I had to get completely trashed. Later on I felt the overwhelming need to go to the bathroom. Steve happened to be there behind me in line. When it was my turn I stepped inside, but to my surprise Steve asked me to double time by pissing in the shower.
"Eh, there's no harm in saying yes" but then immediately turned to "No. You're drunk. He's drunk. He's gross. Mark is upstairs. Bad things. Ew." My brain said.
"Sure, why not?" my mouth said.
When we finished, Steve literally jumped me. His filthy piss-soaked hands were all over my body. I wanted to throw up, but one of the frat guys began pounding on the door which ended my wave of nausea. I never felt so much relief in my life.
I began to replay the scene in my head:
Did he just do what I think he did? Did he just violate me with dirty dirty hands? I would not stand for this. I bolted upstairs, and had a brief word with Mark. His face suddenly went rigid, and he looked like he was staring at an oncoming train. I knew that something bad was going to happen. The last thing he needed to see was Steve coming up the stairs-
Which happened 30 seconds after I told Mark all about it.
Mark's got a pretty calm demeanor. I've seen him take some slings and arrows, and he's pretty good about laughing it off. This is why I was somewhat shocked to see Mark leap over the table, grab Steve by the face, and plow him into the ground.
Everything erupted into chaos. It must've been my drunken stupor that I swear I saw chairs and coffee tables flying. The frat guys threw the three of us outside, whereupon Mark proceeded to throw Steve threw the door and continued to beat the living hell out of him in the street. By the time Mark was done, Steve was hanging over one of those spikey iron fences with one of the spikes through his inner-thigh.
I must say, I was pretty turned on after seeing that.
So gentleman, the moral of this story is: Wash your fucking hands.
User Reviews
Submitted by speeddaimon (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:59:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Maybe you should just learn to like piss soaked hands. It'd be easier that way.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:36:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what zone said
Submitted by Jocko_Johnson (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:32:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
boo.
DIE.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:27:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You are a stunned, trouble making cunt. Your boyfriend should dump you, but he's probably not too damned bright either. Women like you are a complete waste of time, don't bother wondering why you are a target for abuse - you ask for it.
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:25:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by Domochevsky (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:18:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
There's a part II? I'm sure that it will be exponentially worse than this, save us the trouble of -2-ing another waste of space on the front page and don't post it.
Submitted by SumYumGuy (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:16:18 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this post = flaming pile of dog shit
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:14:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I remember you, you're the one who vomited that stupid girl code crap on the site. This isn't any better.
Submitted by Deisangua (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:11:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If someone gives you a -2 and a comment, you can safely assume I agree with their evaluation of this post.
Submitted by dohnuts (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:11:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"I must say, I was pretty turned on after seeing that."
With any luck, next time it will be you. Why, oh why, couldn't it have been you?
Idiot.
Submitted by bravo_foxtrot (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:11:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Her boyfriend should have beat her ass, she's the one who set herself up in the situation.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:04:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+1 for ass-kickery
+1 for the moral. That made me smile.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:02:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
My brain is bleeding.
Submitted by bravo_foxtrot (user info) at 2004-03-29 15:02:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Please don't grace us with any sequels to this load of crap.