The Classical Music Pill (528 hits)
Category: Sound & MusicRating: 1.33 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by shane mcpherson (View user info) at 2004-03-30 23:42:05 EST
I'm whitering away. My hair is falling out, my eye's have sunken into my face, my skin is pale, and I'm sweating like a diseased pig. I look and smell like a zombie, the undead who now walk the earth.
I have, my friend, heard the same song a million times.
Modern music, that is, is all one song. I don't care if you find "variations" in "chord progressions," look at me. Everywhere I go, every step I take, is marred by filthy, two note R&B hip hop, screaming punk rockers, lousy woman shouting and yelling to rock guitars, a has-been telling me I don't know what it's like to be hated. All sorts. They play it at the mall when I shop for a movie, they play it at the gas station as I pump my car, they play it in my car when I stop pumping gas and try and go home. It's everywhere.
And now I'm dying. I'm writing this to you on my deathbead, dear friends. I just may be the first casualty of the modern music world. Please, learn from me, don't think you'll get used to it, it'll only catch up to you when you least expect it. Life is too precious, my friends. God did not intend us to die this way.
But it's not over yet. Before I go, I have one more thing to tell you about, to let you in on. It's this light I saw, as I lay here, I saw it, a tiny light through a small hole that played a soothing, curious music to my soft ears.
It was the Hungarian Rhapsody, by F. Liszt, in C minor. It was beautiful. It was rhythmatic.
It was music. As it traveled to my ears in a matter so uplifting that I almost floated out of my cot, I found myself saddend that throughout my bombarded with the modern musical culture I had failed to notice such a sweet melody that had been there all along.
But my sadness soon surrendured to the hoardes of strings, percussions, horns, all working in melody, excecuting one outstanding tune so sinlessly achieved, so genuisly crafted, and so utterly pleasing that to comprehend the process of coming about the sound would be a tremendous endeavor.
Tragically, I'm so far in my grave that not even the Hungarian Rhapsody can revive me. And so for the sake of glory I looked where the music came from, and found more tunes that will put me to sleep with honor.
Mozart - Queen of the night. I got the heavenly sound of a voice so toned it sounded of an instrument.
Luciano Pavarotti - Toreador. A round chorus of nothing other than the feeling music was intended to give.
And the greatest of all, the sound created by Bethoven, a solo "Ave Maria."
It shut my eyes for good now, but I have an exit emitted with none other but ecstasy.
Well, I'm dead now. Good bye my friends. Remember to take my passing as a lesson.
User Reviews
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-03-31 01:37:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes excellent presentation, bravo.
Fire up some Kiri Te Kawana...oh, the voice...
Submitted by HotCarI (user info) at 2004-03-31 00:51:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this sucks
fuck off and cry somewhere else
Submitted by Zeccs (user info) at 2004-03-31 00:36:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Goodbye, and may vivaldi's rychien okierta in D minor wait for you in the afterlife.
Submitted by Red_Pants (user info) at 2004-03-31 00:32:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Classical music is is sour. Who is interested in music? Music forms the soul lucky, but in the same way it forms also flockige animals lucky and by classical music is for Sauger. Who is imported with music? Music forms the lucky soul, but in the same animal way it forms also flocks the lucky bitch and for animals means I not and the small children. Whom murders to two on hospitals of the incontinent animals me gives, do not mean kids and children. Who gives two to shit over hospitals of the children?
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-03-31 00:12:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Me likey gud muzik.
Submitted by Messenger (user info) at 2004-03-31 00:01:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Messenger
*The facial hair returns April 31, Mama said so.*
Submitted by Matt <matt.at.deathbystarlight.com> at 2004-03-30 23:50:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
bravo