Dave Matthews Must Die (13234 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.08 on 61 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB <dell_fargus.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-04-03 00:28:08 EST
He is every-freakin-place that I go. The guy in the next cubicle pollutes my air with the high-pitched whinings from the man for 40+ hours a week. Cars next to me at the redlight blare his bile through subwoofers that sound like sneakers in the dryer. The chicks that frequent my local corner watering hole seem put twenty dollars into the jukebox and play seven hours worth of his bad cover tunes. The bastard was actually put on the cover of this month's Relix magazine, which I refuse to read for that reason. Tonight, I have absofuckinglutely had it: Dave Matthews has to die if I want to keep my sanity.
He used to be cool. I remember that he had a song on the FM radio that played constantly in the summer of '95 (the one that goes Whadd-a-would you saaay.) He couldn't just be a one-hit-wonder and simply fade into the same obscurity as Tommy Tu-Tone and the guy that sang Rock Me Amadeus. But nooooo, he had to stick around and tour posing under the guise of a jam band. To some dumb college kids, the words "jam" and "band" used in the same sentence instantly translate into "Duuuude, lets split a six-pack of Natural Light and a joint between the twelve of us and act like a bunch of assholes in the lot until we get either arrested or chased." The Dave Matthews Band is to music what Michelob Ultra is to beer.
You may ask, "Bob, why do you dislike the man so much?" I have many reasons. Everywhere you see a gal wearing those little Malcolm X-type glasses, you can rest assured that outside, there is a white, oval-shaped sticker on her car with the letters DMB printed on it in black. If you try to strike up ant form of conversation with this person, she'll inevitably have to mention "the Central Park Concert" or the "warehouse" or something about prancing nancies. This makes me go absolutely apeshit!
He tries to compare himself to Jerry Garcia. You could dig Jerry Garcia up and he would still have more musical talent in his right pinky* than Dave Matthews ever had - period.
The most brazen thing about The Dave Matthews Band is the actual name of the band. He gives absolutely zero credit to the other guys in the band that actually have talent and carried his sorry ass to where he is today. Dave Matthews is probably the least able member of The Dave Matthews Band. He gives those other guys absolutely zero credit. Any of them could be replaced at any time, for any reason, and 99.99% of the public would be none the wiser. It would still be The Dave Matthews Band.
For all of the above reasons, I feel that Dave Matthews has to die.
*Disclaimer*:
I wish no harm to anyone, even the most annoying people in the world: those chicks that shave off their eyebrows and pencil fake ones back. If anything happens to Dave Matthews in the next few hours it is not my doing because after a few Bass Ales & even more Red Hooks, I am barely able to get out of my own way. Yes, I'm off the wagon tonight.
*Footnote: Jerry Garcia was missing his right pinky finger.
User Reviews
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-10-16 18:00:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2007-10-16 17:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I absolutely love that someone is using this post as a reference on Facebook for a group called, "We Loathe Dave Matthews."
________
awesome indeed.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2007-10-16 17:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I absolutely love that someone is using this post as a reference on Facebook for a group called, "We Loathe Dave Matthews."
Submitted by DasHeer (user info) at 2007-05-11 11:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Tim <dmbfan21.at.rock.com> at 2004-07-14 17:57:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
pick up a guitar and write like he does...develop a fan base like him and then I will vlaue your opinion because as of right now I would rather have listened to a dead squirel's opinion. You are a complete moron and btw what did jerry garcia do oh yea....Touch of grey?
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you're dumb, for all you know Dave Suxalot's band might have had some hardcore inside connection that the layman doesn't have, and since when do you have to be as competent as someone else to have an opinion about them. That's like anytime someone says "Hey I think Mats Sundin sucks" and some wise ass says "Well he could kick your ass in hockey" you're comparing apples to oranges, as an entertainer he sucks theres a lot better than him (In my opinion) but he is a talented musician.
Just because you can play, doesn't mean you make good music, Hendrix was a great guitarist but a lot of his songs were sort of ho-hum because they didn't have what it took to entertain the masses of ignoramus's out there
Same as someone like _________ (Insert random pop diva's name here) can sing catchy lyrics and be a super star and yet have no real talent
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2007-05-11 10:58:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm only giving you a +2 because I like YOU.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-24 06:01:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-10 09:48:50 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-12 02:52:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
this article is just a bunch of bullshit. I gurantee the guy who wrote it is just some gueer who runs around in his mommas dresses and listens to their musid. I love dave Matthews Band and I do not appreciate you dogging the lead singer for 2 pararaph of stupid ass shit. Dave could probably kick your ass any day so shut up!
===========================
It bothers me that I do not remember writing this.
-=-=-
\
what the fuck was I on?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-10 09:48:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-12 02:52:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
this article is just a bunch of bullshit. I gurantee the guy who wrote it is just some gueer who runs around in his mommas dresses and listens to their musid. I love dave Matthews Band and I do not appreciate you dogging the lead singer for 2 pararaph of stupid ass shit. Dave could probably kick your ass any day so shut up!
===========================
It bothers me that I do not remember writing this.
Submitted by Wazza (user info) at 2005-03-14 14:24:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Daves fan club? look out Bob.
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2005-03-14 14:02:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dave Matthews suck ass, and the guy who wrote "Rock me, Amadeus" was Falco.
Dave Matthews couldn't hold Falco's jock. If, of course, Falco had a jock that, ya know... needed, um... holding?
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-03-14 14:01:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love Dave Matthews Band but this was hilarious (especially the pic of him getting pwned by an anvil).
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-14 13:59:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I absolutely cannot stand the guy , his politics or his music but let's take two guesses who's Mrs. Shlongy's favorite band.
Your first guess doesn't count.
Every summer, she takes a road trip with the girls to go see DMB...either in Atlanta or Charlotte.
CD's- how may live ones does he have now?...DVD's...Even the damn Winn-Dixie movie. Ugh.
I can't stand even letting her drive anywhere because that's all you hear in her car.
Submitted by Anarchilist (user info) at 2005-03-14 13:58:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad.
That Michalob(sp?) Ultra joke has been beaten to death. And the warning at the bottom should not have been there, other than that it was pretty funny.
Submitted by swing39 (user info) at 2005-03-14 13:49:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well said - DMB bites my crank. In particular I hate the sax player - i've never heard so many clams... And I'm sick of hearing his wimped-out, fucked-up, jive-ass, psuedo-bluesy riffs (quoting Pat Metheny on Kenny G).
Also, props for bringing up those lame-ass oval stickers - you have to be a complete tool to stick one of those on your car.
Submitted by v3ri745 (user info) at 2005-03-14 13:10:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
To quote rad1101, then laugh at him
"this article is just a bunch of bullshit. I gurantee the guy who wrote it is just some gueer who runs around in his mommas dresses and listens to their musid. I love dave Matthews Band and I do not appreciate you dogging the lead singer for 2 pararaph of stupid ass shit. Dave could probably kick your ass any day so shut up!"
What's a pararaph? Did Dave put you up to this?
Lay off the blow rad1101
--Truth
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-03-14 13:02:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate those fucks.
Submitted by HZRD (user info) at 2005-03-14 12:46:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THANK YOU
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-12 02:52:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this article is just a bunch of bullshit. I gurantee the guy who wrote it is just some gueer who runs around in his mommas dresses and listens to their musid. I love dave Matthews Band and I do not appreciate you dogging the lead singer for 2 pararaph of stupid ass shit. Dave could probably kick your ass any day so shut up!
Submitted by RouteTwo (user info) at 2005-03-12 02:33:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i'm not sure why dmb is getting the rap for the chicago bus incident. the band wasn't even on the bus when it happened. the driver is the only dumbass in the situation. and hey, it's not like chicago's rivers could get any dirtier anyway.
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2004-12-03 15:29:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-12-03 15:18:24 (#)
Ranking: 0
8 months later, I am still getting about 2 hate emails a week over this, and I have been signed up for numerous DMB fan clubs.
Tee hee!
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Wow! That's just sad. Well, the hate mail part. The DMB fan club thing is pretty funny.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2004-12-03 15:25:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck him, right in his sweaty little african asshole.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-12-03 15:18:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
8 months later, I am still getting about 2 hate emails a week over this, and I have been signed up for numerous DMB fan clubs.
Tee hee!
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:52:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What I'm saying is he made a dave matthews band HATE post before the Chicago incident where their tour bus dumped shit all over some tourists that were in a boat underneath them.
There are alot of people bashing them now...making fun of them for that incident and other things as well.
So Bob was right in hating those assclowns. And he was before alot of the rest of us.
Submitted by Degreeless2 (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:52:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Please have my children, bob.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:50:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"To say that Dave Matthews is the least talented member of the band is like saying that certain places on the sun aren't as hot as others."
____________________________________________________________________
HAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Stabkill, what the hell are you talking about? Dave Matthews went mainstream some time in the mid 90's.
Submitted by Freakmagnet (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:48:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-09-10 21:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd just like to bring attention to this post because BLITZKREIG_BOB made this well before the Dave Matthews Band Bus dumped their stored urine and feces on a bunch of tourists.
You knew they sucked before it went mainstream.
Bob is one step ahead of the rest of us......
Submitted by T1000 (user info) at 2004-08-31 00:34:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
first off to the asshole that said dave matthews is a good guitarist - HE'S NOT!! He plays stupid easy to play chord rhythms that sounds like folk music with down syndrome. What people like you don't realize is that "flashy" solos are "flashy" because they are unique sounding and extremely difficult to do, I'd like to see Ol' Dave have a crack at any Metallica song. Take a great electric guitarist like oh say Zakk Wylde. Would he be able to play the same easy acoustic crap that Dave plays? WHY YES, HE CAN AND HIS ACOUSTIC MUSIC IS BETTER TOO. Would Dave be able to play any of the electric work that Zakk does, or anything of the sort? NOPE. Not to mention Zakk is a more diverse vocalist and doesnt sound like hes smoked himself into a coma, but thats just to add insult to injury.
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-08-22 13:31:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this article or any of the comments. It looked long enough for you to have supported your opinion.
+2 - Dave Matthews needs to die. Of syphilis.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-08-22 13:15:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what the guy below me said!
Submitted by elquemis (user info) at 2004-08-22 13:06:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
In the sense that I used to hate Dave Matthews' music as well, I can relate to you, and it is your God-given right not to like him or his music if you so choose. However, you are breathtakingly mistaken on a number of points.
To say that Dave Matthews is the least talented member of the band is like saying that certain places on the sun aren't as hot as others. (A little larger scale of an example than I needed, but I'm sure you get the point.) This is besides the fact that it's immeasurably debatable at best. I can tell just by reading your writing that you know virtually nothing about the music you're writing about, or you would realize that Dave Matthews is an incredible guitar player. The fact that he doesn't do anything that appears to be particularly flashy with his instrument (solos, for example) is very misleading. Where other guitar players often must tune up, tune down, use a capo or use alternate tunings in order to play their own songs, Dave never does any of the above*, and often plays in keys that would make an ordinary guitar player run screaming, and can play those songs for long enough to fatigue even the best of them.
You also seem to have no idea that Dave Matthews writes 99% of the material that the Band plays and records. Your insinuation that the band carried him to where he is now is pretty much the opposite of true, and when you consider that without Dave, the rest of the band would have no songs, no frontman, and no reason to play their respective instruments together, the name of the Band doesn't seem so misplaced. This is besides the fact that you're taking up arms and offense at the name of the band presumably just because you don't like them on behalf of its members, even though none of them have ever expressed any disdain whatsoever at the Band's name.
Dave Matthews' songs, however, are loved because they are something that is a rarity in the world of music today: they are real. They are a true reflection of the artist who wrote them, an artist who has not sold out to the mass market but is interested only in his craft. To say that he is an amazing songwriter would not be a strong enough statement, as he can write original music for any mood that is incredible, and he can write lyrics for any occasion that somehow, without striking you over the head, can still make you think, and are at once deep and artistic.
I used to hate Dave Matthews' music, too, as I said, and I'm sure fans of his, had I known them at the time, would have annoyed me greatly as well. But sometimes you don't love something until you've seen somebody else love it first, and that's what happened to me. The songs that get play on the radio do NOT reflect at all the depth and wonder and sheer power of Dave's songs.
Granted, there are a number of people out there who are Dave fans and who are probably just a little less socially inclined than, say for example, a guy who writes long-winded articles calling for the intolerance and death of whatever he doesn't like on the internet, but cut 'em some slack. I'll bet you Jerry Garcia (or whoever it is you would rather listen to) has his share of annoying fans, too. People are people.
You're free to like or dislike whatever you want to, and, for that matter, free to make claims that any individual or group you please "must die." But I implore you, please, learn something about that group or that individual and what it is they do before you do so.
Submitted by Sarah James <sarahjames22.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-08-05 17:22:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this article is just a bunch of bullshit. I gurantee the guy who wrote it is just some gueer who runs around in his mommas dresses and listens to their musid. I love dave Matthews Band and I do not appreciate you dogging the lead singer for 2 pararaph of stupid ass shit. Dave could probably kick your ass any day so shut up!
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-08-01 04:21:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by RouteTwo (user info) at 2004-07-14 00:38:23 (#)
Ranking: 0
I admit many dave fans are teenage girls. I'm glad to also admit that I'm not one...Now Bob, I'm not trying to make any enemies, but I'm not sure that any of your other points are valid. So let me make my own:
1. What's wrong with stoners? I wouldn't call myself one, but the stuff can make a believer out of anyone...
2. Yea, definitely not a one-hit wonder band. I can think of at least 8 songs that made it big on the radio. At least 2 of them are decent.
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1. Stoners blow. I loathe DMB. My stoner friends love DMB. I have a higher sperm count than they do, thus my opinion wins in the long run.
2. 8 songs on the radio...2 are decent. THOSE numbers can make a believer out of anyone.
BURN DMB!
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-08-01 04:17:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep bringing me them hits, kids.
Submitted by SaveAHorseRideACowboy (user info) at 2004-08-01 04:07:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
DMB is one of my fav bands , not cool
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-07-27 00:04:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck you!
Submitted by Jonathan Durk <jd9118.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-07-22 22:49:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
DUDE I SO AGGREE WITH U ON THIS ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY!!! I HATE DAVE MATTHEWS SOOOO MUCH AND EVERYONE AT MY F ING SCHOOL IS SO OPSESSED WITH THEM I WANT TO SMACK THEM IN THE FACE FOR LISING TO THAT GARBAGE SH!T!!! DAVE MATTHEWS SUCKS IT SOUNDS LIKE F ING COUNTRY MUSIC!!! AND I HATE HOW EVERYONE SAYS ITS NOT WHEN IT IS!!! I PLAY GUITAR 2 AND I CAN MAKE SOOO MUCH BETTER MUSIC THAN THIS F@G. ALL I HAVE TO SAY TO U DAVE MATTHEWS FANS IS U SUCK!!!!! IF U WANT TO LISING TO A GOOD BAND LISING TO THE OLD METALLICA!!!! THAT IS THE GOOD SH!T!!! IF METALLICA AND DAVE MATTHEWS WERE ON TOUR TOGETHER METALLICA WHOULD BLOW THEM AWAY, THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY SO PEICE!!!
Submitted by Paul at 2004-07-21 20:53:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so true
Submitted by SIR <SHUT THE FUCK UP> at 2004-07-14 19:10:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
u should die
DMB LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by dave <kitkatjam36.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-07-14 18:38:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
youre a dumbass. you should do a little research before you post complete falsehoods. youre a dumbass and DMB is the best band still breathing. youre a dumbass, dumbass.
Submitted by Tim <dmbfan21.at.rock.com> at 2004-07-14 17:57:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
pick up a guitar and write like he does...develop a fan base like him and then I will vlaue your opinion because as of right now I would rather have listened to a dead squirel's opinion. You are a complete moron and btw what did jerry garcia do oh yea....Touch of grey?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-07-14 15:38:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Irresponsible journalism at its worst.
Dave Matthews did not affix the title to the band. It was placed by a concert promoter that was told by Leroi Moore(the saxophonist) to put Dave Matthews on the sign and the people wo will show will be mildly surprised to see a band and not one man. The promoter Put Dave Matthews Band up instead. The name stuck.
By sterotyping all Dave Matthews Band fans as teenage girls and college students, you miss over 75% of their demographic. Constant touring since 1991 has built a fan base of all ages, a fact that is immediately apparent at any one of their 60-80 shows per year.
Dave Matthews has never compared himself to Jerry Garcia(who was missing part of a middle finger) but others have made this distinction.
As far as not recognizing the band as a whole, you couldn't be more wrong. He continually credits them with the overall success of the band.
Submitted by RouteTwo (user info) at 2004-07-14 00:38:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I admit many dave fans are teenage girls. I'm glad to also admit that I'm not one...Now Bob, I'm not trying to make any enemies, but I'm not sure that any of your other points are valid. So let me make my own:
1. What's wrong with stoners? I wouldn't call myself one, but the stuff can make a believer out of anyone...
2. Yea, definitely not a one-hit wonder band. I can think of at least 8 songs that made it big on the radio. At least 2 of them are decent. The only 'sellout', terrible cd they ever released was "Everyday", hence the radio-overplay.
3. But c'mon now, saying the band isn't talented is complete horseshit. And then comparing them to the dead? A little research next time could help you from making this mistake again. Dave is in the top-30 guitarists of all time--top 10 of today. He doesn't really play lead, but his rhthym playing is the strongest I've ever heard. Carter (drums) picked up sticks in jazz clubs at the fuckin age of 3! I couldn't do that. He is now considered by many to be the best in the world (alive). Stefan (bass) got a recording contract from a producer who happened to walk by him playing on the street. Boyd's (strings) solo album hit #3 on Billboard last year (even though it sucked).
4. Dave is somewhere around #40 on the Forbes list every year. This is largely due to ticket sales for their tours. I've never witnessed another band sell out a 50,000 seat venue in 5 minutes (consistently).
Anyway, believe it or not, I'm not a die-hard fan. I'm just a musician--I know this shit. But hey, that's alright though if you don't like the band, just give some good reasons. I can't find it in myself to hate people for their taste in music.
Note: I don't wear those pseudo-intellectual glasses you speak of. Sounds hot. Know where I can get some?
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-07-14 00:05:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by maggot (user info) at 2004-07-13 23:51:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by NOT retarded <playfuldead.at.aol.com> at 2004-07-13 23:32:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
man... that was funny shit, but the guy obviously has NO IDEA what he's talking about... every member of that band is equally talented... and is EQUALLY PAID you dumb shit, it was the OTHER members who thought of the name, he went solo because there was a few songs the band didnt really LIKE. so dont voice your opinion if you're just going to make an ass of yourself. god you people are morons...
Submitted by Magicaddict (user info) at 2004-06-08 18:50:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I am personally not a fan of Dave Matthews, but he is easily one of the most skilled guitarists currently in the industry. Saying he is talentless is rather like saying that chicken doesn really taste like chicken.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-06-08 18:33:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2004-04-29 20:55:44 (#)
Ranking: -2
i agree he does get overplayed, but saying he is not talented is just absurd. the man holds an incredible amount of talent in the way of strumming and unique chords... i'd go into detail, but i'm drunk. i think rolling stone ranked him in the top 30 for greatest guitar players. try and play some dave matthews on a guitar and you'll find how amazing he really is.
============================================================
what he said...
do you play guitar?
i do, so i can rightly say that Dave Matthews is incredibly talented. i'm guessing you've only heard what is played on the radio, which i agree can be annoying (yeah, what would you say is not a good song), but a lot of his music is pretty good from a musician's standpoint. it takes an incredible amount of hard work, dedication, and talent to do what he does. you'd never be able to do it.
Submitted by Flak (user info) at 2004-05-13 13:52:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AGREED INDEED!!!
BTW:I hate Jerry Garcia nearly as much.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-05-13 13:50:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
After reading it, I believe that the line about he should've quit at one-hit-wonder status speaks for me.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-05-13 13:44:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm pretreating this post because I hate Dave Matthews so.
Why the hell would someone go solo if they have a fucking band named after them?!
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-05-13 13:38:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you are a FUcking freak and i think you should die ASSHOLE.DAVE MATTHEWES ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!
Submitted by Great_Teacher_Largo (user info) at 2004-04-29 20:58:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I personally like some of Dave Matthews Bands songs, but a lot of it is garbage. But for the record Jerry Garcia had his right middle finger chopped off by his older brother when he was 4.
"Victory will be min3"
GTL
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2004-04-29 20:55:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i agree he does get overplayed, but saying he is not talented is just absurd. the man holds an incredible amount of talent in the way of strumming and unique chords... i'd go into detail, but i'm drunk. i think rolling stone ranked him in the top 30 for greatest guitar players. try and play some dave matthews on a guitar and you'll find how amazing he really is.
Submitted by Turin <wickedwrister.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-04-29 20:48:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dave Matthews sucks ass. All the (limited) talent from his band comes from the other members who, as you so astutely pointed out, get no credit. The man is a serious contender for most self-inflated ass of all time. Wonderful piece, just wonderful. Dave Matthews must die.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-04-23 13:23:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You had me right up until you made the Jerry Garcia comparison. Dave Matthews may be annoying but at least he's a competant musician. Jerry Garcia blows goats.
Submitted by MetalCellist (user info) at 2004-04-23 13:04:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very funny indeed, but I'm afraid the facts are only slightly off. Jerry is missing half of his right MIDDLE finger as a result of a childhood wood-chopping accident with his brother.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2004-04-13 21:56:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
TOOL
Submitted by Eric <Phillychezesteak.at.aol.com> at 2004-04-13 21:44:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Everything this genius of a man just said is exactly what i've been attempting to convey to my asshole Dave loving friends.. he should die and burn.
Submitted by kgbpasha (user info) at 2004-04-03 16:20:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
He is a male version of Alanis Morrisette.
Whiney bitches.
Submitted by lush (user info) at 2004-04-03 12:17:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't even have to finish reading this, I totally agree, I hate that whiny bitch
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2004-04-03 12:06:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm laughing my ass off....while listening to the Dave Matthew's Band. And proudly representing the .01% that would be the wiser. I'm all out of Natural Light, though. I have some Tilburg's, does that count?
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-04-03 10:38:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Duuuude, lets split a six-pack of Natural Light and a joint between the twelve of us and act like a bunch of assholes in the lot until we get either arrested or chased."
AHAHAHAHAH (pause to breathe) AHAHAHAHA
This is pretty much how I feel about Phish - sorry Razor & Glam you know I love you, but I just can't get into Phish.
note to the uninformed: Captain Trips lost his finger when he was a kid screwing around when his older brother Tiff was chopping wood - hence the more talent in his little finger gag.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-04-03 05:21:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH INTO MEEEEEEEEEEEEE..
...CRAAAAAAAAAASH....
CRASH! DIE! BURN!
Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2004-04-03 05:00:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Another (+2) for the anvil on the head thing. God, Dave rules!
Submitted by zildjian3670 <zildjian3670.at.cogentdigerati.cj> at 2004-04-03 04:21:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well isn't that special...
Submitted by maleficent1 <maleficent1111.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-04-03 04:18:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHa +2 for the laughs I got reading this to my bf a huge Dave fan---and yah prancing nancies was great too
Submitted by Mollification (user info) at 2004-04-03 01:24:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jwlmar10 (user info) at 2004-04-03 01:07:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I like his music.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:52:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
sfulorettoPA: Are you a Penn-Stater?
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:51:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:29:41 (#)
Ranking: 1
I do hate the typical DMB fan, but I still like his music.
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what he said
Submitted by Melany (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:42:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny.
Submitted by sfulorettoPA (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:42:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I like Dave Matthews but i do know what you are talking about he seems to be everywhere and it gets annoying real fast, the two stoners that live in the room next to me Dave Matthews is all they listen to.
Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:37:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
(+2) because I like Dave Mathews.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:31:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
It took alcohol to make me lose my uber-cherry.
This sucks.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:31:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Hahah! Prancing nancies! comedy gold!
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-04-03 00:29:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I do hate the typical DMB fan, but I still like his music.