Bart, prepare to be OWNED. (2048 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.83 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by gascs (View user info) at 2004-04-08 12:05:22 EDT
You might have written me off. You might think that this round of UberMadness is going to be an easy win for you. Guess what? I'm comin' out swingin' like that guy that beat up Andy Dick. I don't care if you ARE the creator and proprietor of this site. What's more, I don't care if you DO have 5 times as many hits as I do, or that your one website IS more successful than the entire ring of "midgets in scenes and costumes from MASH" porn sites I have set up. Finally, I don't care if you DID make me wear that little white dress that you like so much and do that leg-crossing thing from Basic Instinct last night. This competition is about to catch on fire, and I'm the hydrant that's going to put it out (not to be confused with the one that gets pissed on by that big dog down the street).
Check out these reviews:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/26062#393082
You like that, Bart? Hear the footsteps?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/21809#321654
You'll never see me comin'. I'm sneakin' up to shoplift your pootie like my name was Winona.
AND these ACTUAL testimonials from respected users:
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Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-01-07 16:40:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, I want to do you, you perfect hot piece of ass!
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Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-01-05 19:13:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
Break me off a lil' sum sum, you're chaging the world, one letter at a time, you cake eating spot of brilliance!
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Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-01-06 04:59:47 (#)
Ranking: 2
That's awesome, you're hot, you gorgeous hot piece of ass!
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Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-01-07 16:00:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
You rock, you're even better than my mom's potatoes, you monkey-lovin' genius!
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Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-03-05 06:26:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG LOL HAHAHA ROFL LMAO HA, great ass, you monkey-lovin' porn star!
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The gascs fan club is like, um, (uh, 5 + 2 = ?), 4 members strong! That's at least TWO more than ONE!!! PREPARE TO BE OWNED.
Fuck, who am I kidding? I'm sorry. Please be gentle.
![vaseline[1].jpg (31 kB)](http://stuff.ubersite.com/1081440322656916003/1/vaseline[1].jpg)
User Reviews
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-08-03 02:57:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahaha
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2004-07-20 02:43:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's go time, pal!
Submitted by 01011010 (user info) at 2004-07-20 01:28:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now that's 'MOE' like it.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-04-22 01:22:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by fionavar (user info) at 2004-04-09 21:57:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gascs,
It was the mint jelly comment, wasn't it?
I'm so glad I've found someone who shares my fetish.
And it leaves your mouth minty-clean, too!
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2004-04-09 02:35:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bart: Kicker of all gascs (+2)
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-04-09 02:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why can't I be owned?
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2004-04-08 20:43:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy crap, fionavar, I have to say, I'm a more than a little turned on right now.
Submitted by fionavar (user info) at 2004-04-08 18:58:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Add one more to the gascs fan club! 4 + 1 = 41 members.
I'd do you in a hot-tub full of mint jelly, you sexy, throbbing, ten inches of hot genoa salami.
Submitted by gbusman (user info) at 2004-04-08 18:56:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gascs, you truly deserve this "Kicker of all ass" rating.
-Bus
Submitted by Jays567 (user info) at 2004-04-08 18:47:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I will give you all the +2's in the world, as long as you don't ever...I mean ever describe you're Basic Instinct leg crossing you did for Bart again. :X
Submitted by Velouria at 2004-04-08 17:35:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No one uses Vaseline anymore, astroglide or equivalent people!
Submitted by iamhewhoisnot (user info) at 2004-04-08 17:10:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by psyduck (user info) at 2004-04-08 16:49:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hil-fucking-larious
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-04-08 15:21:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I will be a part of the gascs fan club.
So make that 5+9= 5 fans.
Submitted by Mr-Boo (user info) at 2004-04-08 14:46:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by K.M (user info) at 2004-04-08 14:28:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2004-04-08 14:13:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking hilarious.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:55:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I normally pull for the underdog, but the underdog beat me Bush style. This means that in the next 4 rounds, you will turn Übersite into the most hated website in the world.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:50:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your ass is grass.
Greasy slippery Vasoline covered grass.
Submitted by gascs (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:33:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
antluvdog - I dunno, I thought about it, but I think it *might* have given my identity away.
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:31:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You should have saved this for Ubermadness.
Submitted by volklcess (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:26:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Me want my title!
Submitted by shark25 (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:14:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
NICE!!!!
Submitted by Rixes (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:13:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"midgets in scenes and costumes from MASH"
Submitted by Deisangua (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:12:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Heh...
Submitted by speeddaimon (user info) at 2004-04-08 13:03:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ahh, actual comedy. This was great.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:57:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know why I expected that nice blue lid to belong to baby food....
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:36:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the pic.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:23:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you will P0\/\/n Bart.
title isn't up yet.....
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:19:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This is good.
Submitted by pot8tomanjack (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:15:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
it was good until the last line, you sarcastic apologizing bag of weeds
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:13:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes.
I'll put $10 on Gascs... I'll even go so far as to pay the exchange rate.
Submitted by drink_DDT (user info) at 2004-04-08 12:07:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
WHERES MY TITLE?