Bitch called me a pervert!!! (649 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: -1.11 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DeezNutz (View user info) at 2004-04-15 17:48:00 EDT
For the past 6 weeks or so, every damn night (and sometimes during the day) I had to endure listening to constant moaning and groaning as my roomate boned his girlfriend. At first it felt like being a blind guy at a live sex show, but soon it became annoying. I must admit, it was quite boner inducing, but at the expense of a good nights sleep. As I was laying in bed at night listening to my CD player trying to drown out the noise, I decided it was time to get even.
I hit the local clubs last night and met a nice hot chick (to give somewhat of an idead: Does the word BOING!!!!! mean anything?). We hung around for about two hours, visited a bar for a few drinks, and cam home around 12:30AM. My roomate didn't come back yet, but i didn't decide to wait. He got back with his girl about 10 minutes into my romp with "my" woman, and this time he was forced to go through the same thing he put me through before.
During the third round, I was thinking to myself "Payback's a bitch ain't it??"
This morning my roomate and his girl came out of his room just in time to see Jen (that's her name, coincidentally the same as the name of my roomates girl) give me a nice kiss goodbye and walk out the door.
I don't know whether it was the fact that she was 2 years older than me, or that she was half Asian, but instead of being congratulated for my stamina and taste in women...
"You're a fuckin' perv!" were the first words out of my roomate girls mouth.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! That felt like having my gonads displaced with a 50lbs sledgehammer.
She got boned countless times, but nobody called my roomate a "fuckin' perv" least of all me, and I never called his girl a slut or a nympho.
WHERE'S THE FUCKIN' JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD?????
User Reviews
Submitted by Babylon at 2004-04-16 11:30:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You fuckin homophobes, your ratings were plain weak
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-04-15 20:47:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I have to agree with Random Joe's analysis of the entire episode......I too came away with the feeling that it pissed you off that it wasn't YOU............in your roomates bed..................facedown in a pillow..........being ass-pounded till the wee hours of the night..DON"T YOU KNOW....its "IN" to be gay now.....so........you're on the brink of being with the "IN" crowd.....JUMP on in.........the Crisco is perfectly warmed
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-04-15 19:48:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so what actually happened was you and your boyfriend/roomate were having sex every night and it was taking its toll on your sleep time. Your too much of a bitch to confront your boyfriend/roommate so chose instead to pick up a half asian "girl" and get boned by her/him/it to make him jealous? Then when this half asian dude is leaving you get called a perv and it gets your panties all up in a bunch so you decide to waste peoples time by writing about it. at least you remembered to lie and pretend like your not gay. I saw right through your bullshit.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-04-15 18:51:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
next time...why don't you just speak up to her instead of posting on Uber
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2004-04-15 18:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
mmmm...half asian
+2 just for having some of that
Thank you for your patronage.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-04-15 18:37:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you should have just jerked off and moaned really loudly
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-15 18:29:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Get bent!
Submitted by Mr.Bungle (user info) at 2004-04-15 18:05:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would record the sounds from their room and play the through the stereo at top volume at 4 in the morning. They should get the hint after that!
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2004-04-15 17:55:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you are a fucking perv
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-04-15 17:50:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut up perv.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-04-15 17:49:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who cares?