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My 5 Pet Peeves, in no particular order... (692 hits)

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Rating: 0.27 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)

Submitted by Beastie Girl (View user info) at 2004-04-16 04:33:11 EDT

My pet peeves stem from years of repeated annoyances with certain subjects/objects/categories, as goes without saying. Sometimes I feel guilty for making such broad generalizations, but repeated experiences condition one to develop aversions simply because it makes life that much more explainable. Personally, I believe in the straightest line being the quickest and most rational path, so that would obviously include avoiding any potentially unpleasant situations or variables. Many would say I'm being judgemental, but in a fast-paced society such as ours, who has time to waste on anything that's proven to be wasteful and unpleasant in previous experiences? And now, my list.

Please note that as disagreeable as my hatred towards certain "things" may be, and as "offensive" as it may seem, I am simply voicing my displeasing and unfortunate experiences with the following. I understand the rule of "exceptions", but please... let me vent, goddammit.

As I stated in the title, these are in no particular order...

1) Rappers.
Ugh. After years of working for a production company that dealt with these elitest, pompous, and largely uneducated "artists", I have come to the conclusion that they are all 1) primitively provincial in their lack of manners, common sense, and social skills; 2) the most self-serving and ignorantly self-indulgent morons who constantly spew righteous and obviously unresearched words of platform-less political propaganda to appear more socially aware and to ignite the inner blaze of the equally ignorant followers they're presenting to; and 3) the most unprofessional and discourteous group of people to attempt any semblance of a business relationship with. If you're billed to perform at 11pm, then wouldn't common sense tell you to show up to the venue earlier than 11:15pm?

2) Hippie-protesters
What the hell is really being accomplished by these long-haired, pushing-50, unemployed-so-they-have-nothing-better-to-do self-righteous types who parade up and down the busiest and most integral roads in our daily commute to obnoxiously shout out "PEACE, NOT WAR" or "GET RID OF BUSH"? Do they really think I'm sitting in my truck taking their words to heart instead of scrambling beneath my seat for loose change to hurl at them in my already aggravating drive home? Get a job.

3) Yorkshire Terriers
I can't stand most little bitch dogs, but these take the cake. With their long eye-covering coat of hair concealing the devilish eyes of yipping and yapping hell, I can't help but associate a barking little Yorkshire Terrier with a soccer ball. These things are disguised in the umbrella of cuteness only to unleash on the unsuspecting passer-by an ear-piercing shrill of a bark accompanied by a throaty growl and evil prong of puncturing teeth. I hate them, especially when they have those damn bows in their hair. Die, evil dog spawn, with the swift deliverance of my toe upon your belly as I kick you across the room...

4) Rice Rockets
Politically incorrect? I don't give a damn. The term describes all of the import racecars from Japan that not only bear obnoxiously bright top coats resembling that of an Easter egg, but also emit from their exhaust pipes an annoying and emasculating whirr similar to that of a wind-up toy possessed by the devil. In addition to this, the interior of said "rice rocket" is usually comparable to that of a Gap commercial with its bright pastels and contrasting piping in an even brighter and more obnoxious hue. The worst part is when these things challenge each other at suburban stoplights. They swear that the toughest and meanest car races take place in "Rancho Perfecto" with the Ikea playground as a backdrop...

5) Cheerleaders
Ah, cheerleaders. When I was in high school, all of the girls who weren't skilled enough to make the dance team (our auditions usually took place a good 2 weeks before theirs) were cheerleaders. "Rah-rahs," with their painted faces and stiff executions of poorly-written chants, were the girls who gave it up for the instant-gratification of approval from the jocks and rebels. Their high-pitched screams and feverish bounces were often the subject of ridicule, and those mechanical and robot-like punches of movement were so unappealing that they proved to be an embarassment to our school. No one ever responded to their "let's hear it!" screams, which eventually became shameless pleads for any semblance of school spirit or approval. And yet, they all seem to attempt to revel in the phrase "I WAS A CHEERLEADER," hoping it somehow would associate them with an elite group of popular and admired girls from the 80's. Shut up, and stop squealing at me in your girly voice like a pig caught in the front tires of my Jeep.

So, that's my list of pet peeves. Fluid in nature, I'm sure my list of aversions will shift and change as time goes on, but for now...THIS STUFF GETS ON MY DAMN NERVES.

User Reviews

Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-04-16 11:14:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

After reading your spiel on Rappers, which you put so eloquently, I decided that I want you to marry me and bear my children.

Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2004-04-16 11:10:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

http://www.ubersite.com/m/30052 enough said. Read this if you buy into that.

Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2004-04-16 11:09:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

i hate that word.

Submitted by esso_merda (user info) at 2004-04-16 10:56:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

I smiled. I like rap, but I haven't met any professional rappers.

Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-04-16 07:29:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

The title reminded me of when I read High Fidelity.

Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-04-16 07:19:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

I agree with 3 of them...

Submitted by Magicaddict (user info) at 2004-04-16 06:58:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Yorkshire terriers? Not bad at all. Yorkshiremen - there's a grim set of people.

Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-04-16 06:27:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

... try again.

Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-04-16 06:24:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I just didn't see Yorkshire Terriers coming. What a random thing to dislike.

Submitted by McMuffin (user info) at 2004-04-16 06:13:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I liked this.

I hate Rap.

Always remember: "You can't spell 'Crap' without 'rap'"

Submitted by Ace (user info) at 2004-04-16 05:05:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Since its 2 am where I live and I have nothing better to do, I thought I'd respond to your views about rappers.

For the most part, I agree with you, but the question I have to ask you is, what do you expect. The majority or these guys miraculously make it big right out of the ghettos of the country, of course their going to be the way you described. You can't blame famous people who may have been previously drug dealing, in gangs, and living in projects and shit. Of course, I'm generalizing here.

There are a couple rappers who have dedicated their carrers to dismanteling the stereotype by adressing serious issues in their songs and trying to be as cultured and intelligent as they can be about it. Talin Kweli and Mos Def are two that come to mind. Anyway, thats just my two cents. This wasn't that bad of a post.

I like rap.

Ya damn skippy.