Google Searches Expose Ubersite's Seedy Underbelly (1844 hits)
Category: Humor -> Dirty HumorRating: 1.57 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DrStrangeDhruv <bigdhruv.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-04-16 11:42:11 EDT
Whilst searching for my regular round of obscenely ghey porn, I stumbled upon a bedrock of scandalous Ubersitry that astounded me.
I invite you to try these startling Google searches for yourself, to find out the whole truth about our very own Ubersite members!
The steps involved are:
1) Go to Google.
2) Type in the following phrases WITH the quotation marks around them.
3) Hit 'I'm Feeling Lucky'
At first, I was searching for some good old fashioned gay porn. I wanted a little edgy attitude to the posers though, and so I keyed in:
"my penis is friggin' gigantic"
and hit the 'I'm Feeling Lucky' button. Wham! Up pops a picture... I guess that fucker was right all along. Oh well, Google doesn't lie.
Upset by the results of my first foray into gay pornography, I decide to take a turn for the regular, feminine species of porn. I type:
"hot, stupid, girl ass"
in the hope of just that. My screen is filled with a picture...
Turns out I was right about her.
And so, following the radiant beauty that filled my screen on that previous search, I feel the hint of 'too much of a good thing' emerging. And so I take a detour for the other extreme:
"physically repulsive human being"
Oh man. Poor little fella. What can I say, Google isn't supposed to lie, right? Just to let you know, buddy, I disagree.
Oh well, too much of that. Time for some raunchy penis photographs! Raunchy, arrogant, self-absorbed penises! I key in
"vain and judgmental prick"
and click on 'I'm Feeling Lucky'. Another picture! As it happens, much of Ubersite was right about this one. Just to let you know, my good man, I don't approve. But Google speaks the truth, right?
Alright, enough fucking about. Time to get back to the good, homey, ghey porn.
"drag queens dressed as madonna"
I type out, licking my chops in anticipation of what is to follow. I hit 'I'm Feeling Lucky'. Holy shit!
Disillusioned, I then embarked on a series of searches filled with lusty, heavily homosexual sentiment.
"are you into anal?"
I asked Google, hitting 'I'm Feeling Lucky'.
"shemales performing ymca"
I asked, hitting the button again.
"black man's severed penis"
I requested, my nastier side arousing.
"very clear homosexual undertones"
I typed, making it clear exactly what I wanted.
Damn if they didn't all lead me to pictures of the very same person...
Ubersite, I ask you: What the fuck is going on? Google is, as you know, one of the most popular search engines on the internet, bearing with it a solid responsibility to report the flat, unbiased truth. Google don't lie baby, and you fuckers have been exposed!
To fully demonstrate my point, type in:
"the world's manliest man"
and hit 'I'm Feeling Lucky'. God damn does it speak the truth.
User Reviews
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-17 18:54:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2004-04-17 18:45:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck you, pal.
Submitted by Melany (user info) at 2004-04-16 20:06:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Too funny!
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-04-16 19:30:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you in a totally platonic way.
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2004-04-16 19:04:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 just for the effort involved. Good work.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-04-16 17:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No. Don't do that. Someone will get too many hits and Bart we reset their hit count.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-04-16 17:04:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My name is Bargled, and I approve this post.
Submitted by quack (user info) at 2004-04-16 15:46:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if youre too lazy to google them, these are the results...
hidden
lisa
chipolatte
kaelic
murphy
ddt
ddt
ddt
ddt
drstrangedhruv
looks like somebody has a ddt fetish.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-04-16 14:43:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That didn't take as much effort as I originally thought... still, I laughed like a schoolgirl.
Submitted by drstrangedhruv (user info) at 2004-04-16 14:14:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Lucid, I'm guessing you didn't enclose the phrases in "".
Submitted by lucid (user info) at 2004-04-16 14:12:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for the effort, but I don't get it. I tried all these and all I got were random websites. I don't think they're all going to the same place as when you did it, or I obviously don't share your sense of humor about Burt Lancaster.
Submitted by SausageKing (user info) at 2004-04-16 13:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-04-16 12:21:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Much asskicking here.
Submitted by okiwilltellyou (user info) at 2004-04-16 12:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
oh
my
god.........
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-04-16 11:46:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Choice. http://www.ubersite.com/m/30512