Long Live the King (786 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesLabels: crap:fiction
Rating: 0.94 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Circe (View user info) at 2004-04-17 02:58:11 EDT
'Maybe you could go and entertain my father for a while. I'm sure I'd be King by morning if he got a taste of you, little wildcat.'
Shenara giggled, and turned onto her stomach to grin at her lover, the Prince. Lying there on his back in the wide bed, the candlelight burnishing his features, his tanned skin, until he seemed to glow from within. God, she loved him. A Prince, a real Prince, the son of the King, and he wanted her, the third daughter of a merchant. It still felt like a dream sometimes, when they were together.
'If you say things like that where people can hear you, you're going to get into trouble, my Lord,' she teased him, running her fingertips over his collarbone.
'There's no-one to hear me but you. And, well... you don't matter much, you know?' He laughed, perfect white teeth gleaming.
She swallowed back the momentary hurt. He was only joking, he loved her. He thought much of her, she knew that. She laughed with him. God, she loved him.
---------------------
'Shenara.' When he spoke her name against her neck that way, caressing her skin with his breath, his voice, she melted. She could no more stand against him than she could defy the tides.
'Yes, my Lord?' Yes, yes, a thousand times yes, anything you ask for, anything you wish.
'Do you love me? Do you wish to someday sit at the side of the King, to be the Queen of the Realm?'
She knew it! She'd always known it, since the first time he'd taken her into his bed. The rumours that was courting the Lady Ehlana were just that, rumours... she was the one destined to be at his side when he assumed the the throne.
'That would be my dearest heart's dream come to life, my Lord. I could be a great Queen... I would do you honour, were I at your side.'
He appeared to think for a moment, and when he spoke, his words were measured, careful. 'My father is an old man, now, and his decisions could lead our land - the land that would be yours, if you want it - into danger. The time may come when I need you to be my right hand, when I need you to do things for me that I cannot do myself, because I am noticed wherever I go. You can scamper through the city, the palace, like a little mouse - no-one cares what you do or where you go. I have kept our love a secret from all for this long for just that reason.'
She could barely breathe, and when she spoke, her words came out as a whisper.'My Lord - I... thought.. I had feared....'
A soft, throaty chuckle came from him, and his eyes were warm. 'That I was ashamed of you? My love, you could grace the halls of heaven with your beauty, and none would doubt your right to be there. I will be proud to claim you as my Queen, when the time comes.'
She melted into his arms, happy, soft. Soon, she willed silently. Let the time be soon.
---------------
'The King is dead! Treason!'
'Dead in his chambers. They say...'
'A knife. A specially made knife... none other like it...'
'They have a little nothing merchant's daughter held for questioning. Obsessed with the Prince...'
'Poor man. They say he'll preside over the hearing personally....'
'Little strumpet should be hanged....'
-----------
'And did you not buy this very knife, after having it made to your precise orders?'
'Yes, but.. my Lord...'
There was a reason, there must be a reason. He wouldn't let her go to the block. She had only ever done as he wished, as he asked. She had devoted her whole heart and mind to him. All she had to do was trust him.
'And was this knife not found in your room, still with the blood of your crime?'
'You asked.. I mean.. my Lord...'
So angry. He was so angry, and cold, and she was so horribly confused. Had she imagined everything, as they said? What had happened? She knew he had come to her, asked her to hide the knife for him... how had they found it, hidden under the stones of her floor as he'd asked?
'I find this.... peasant... guilty of regicide. Death is the only penalty.'
--------------------
Head on the rough wood of the headsman's block. Her hair catching in the splintered surface every time she shifted her face slightly. Still so confused.. HAD she imagined it? His whispered words of love, his honeyed promises?
In the second before the axe came down, and the crowd exhaled softly, she saw him on the balcony. The Lady Ehlana was at his side, and the crown of power was on his handsome head.
She finally understood.
Tainted honey.
User Reviews
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-04-23 15:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shanara is more in keeping with the tone of the piece.
Petty detail, I know. (And only about 3 years late).
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-12-10 18:34:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-12-10 13:04:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Not your best but deserves much higher.
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-05-27 14:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2004-12-12 08:40:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-12-12 08:29:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
this deserves a higher rating
Submitted by Sherman (user info) at 2005-03-09 16:17:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-09 07:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-01-27 00:03:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Congrats on winning UberBoobage!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2004-12-12 08:40:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-12-12 08:29:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
this deserves a higher rating
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-12-12 08:29:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this deserves a higher rating
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-08-26 12:54:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This story has been seriously under-rated.
You should have been given at +1's for the imagery alone.
Something about alot of your writing reminds me a bit of Kerouac. Not so much the style as the way you see things.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-04-20 17:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
wow
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2004-04-18 03:22:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked the dramatic shift between tenderness and the dawn of bitter knowledge. You do treachery and doom well. Probably needs some more editing, but +1 for never naming the male lead.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-04-17 13:44:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
An' I wanna move the town to the clash city rockers
You need a little jump of electrical shockers
You better leave town if you only wanna knock us
Nothing stands the pressure of the clash city rockers
You see the rate they come down the escalator
Now listen to the tube train accelerator
Then you realise that you got to have a purpose
Or this place is gonna knock you out sooner or later
So don't complain about your useless employment
Jack it in forever tonight
Or shut your mouth and pretend you enjoy it
Think of all the money you've got
An' I wanna liquefy everybody gone dry
Or plug into the aerials that poke up in the sky
Or burn down the suburbs with the half-closed eyes
You won't succeed unless you try
You owe me a move say the bells of St. Groove
Come on and show me say the bells of Old Bowie
When I am fitter say the bells of Gary Glitter
No one but you and I say the bells of Prince Far-I
No one but you and I say the bells of Prince Far-I
An' I wanna move the town to the clash city rockers
You need a little jump of electrical shockers
You better leave town if you only wanna knock us
Nothing stands the pressure of the clash city rockers
Rock rock Clash city rockers
Submitted by Melany (user info) at 2004-04-17 12:54:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought it was good, I'd like to read more like it.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-04-17 12:14:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
youarsoghey - Is it ok if I just tell myself that you gave me the +1 you gave to that guy? I think I need it at this point..
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-04-17 12:03:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/30591
That guy annoys me. Plagiarizing bastard.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-04-17 11:29:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
creep firebombing - thanks. It was the name that got me the negative rating to start with, dammit... I'll know better next time. 'Jane' is a nice name....
Again, thanks for the compliment.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-04-17 10:16:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this was good. Damn good. Certainly not deserving of a negative ranking. Change the girl's name though. Shina'ra was the name of a mythical sword in some story or another.
Submitted by FireEagle (user info) at 2004-04-17 10:03:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Thought was about Elvis
Submitted by Lucifer_Industries (user info) at 2004-04-17 04:33:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I don't understand. Is this a continuation of a series? The characters aren't given any introduction or context into the story here. I looked at your user ID to see if there was a beginning to this but I saw none. I think you might be on to something, but as it stands, the recipe leaves a bad taste in the mouth.
Malone
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-04-17 03:43:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Here's another -2 for being a bitch Circe! Be more like QueenAshlee or the Stacey Schwenk..you know the teacher broad.
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-04-17 03:38:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm back and I still haven't read this. hahahaha
I just have one thing to say to you...
WTF, I'M NOT READING ALL THAT!!
Submitted by NintendoCzar (user info) at 2004-04-17 03:09:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/30584
Pictures coupled with words are the better.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-04-17 03:06:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Draconian King - valid opinion. Thanks. Did you actually read this one, unlike the last one of mine that you wandered onto to tell me that I have the same name as some fuckin' character, then hit with a 0 and said 'I didn't read this'?
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-04-17 02:59:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OK seriously, Shinera? eat my ass. What a shitty nigger name.