It's time to fucking GO! (570 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: ocd
Rating: 1.66 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by corn_nugget (View user info) at 2004-04-28 21:59:52 EDT
(I wrote this FOREVER ago... just found it, and I'm posting it... I wrote it back when I was married and crap... Midu was my huz... I'm back from Egypt... etc etc etc)
I guess I'm officially going back to Egypt. How do I know? Because I'm stressed out and in a bad mood. Now, it's not the thought of Egypt that's doing this to me... it's just ME. Before every vacation I always get pissy. Midu and I will end up fighting bad in the next 4 days.... mark my words! I have no clue why I do this, but I do. I noticed it way back 2 1/2 years ago when we were all going to Georgia... I was MAD. Then a few weeks later I went to Egypt, mad again. Then D.C., equally mad. Every time we go up-north to Ludington, I'm mad... It's either the stress of a trip that gets me in a tizzy, or it's childhood trauma.
We used to go on family vactaions durring Ford's 2 week shut-down in July. We'd pack up and drive across country. Now, overall all my memories of these vacations are wonderful. I really feel lucky to have had the chance to travel as much as I did in my childhood. We went out to see the Grand Canyon, the Black Hills, Myrtle Beach, Pikes Peak... just about everything. Christy (my sister) and I counted states one time... I've been to 41 states (or something like that).
But, lets get down to the nitty-gritty of it. We'd pack up the escort among yelling and fussing about EVERYTHING. We'd plan to leave at 5am, and my dad would have a near heart-attack if it was 5:02 and we weren't out the door. So my mom would rush us all into the car and she'd holler for my dad, "Carl, we're ready!!". We'd sit. And wait. And sit. And wait. Then I'd start whining. Then Christy would tell me to shut up. Then my mom would get out of the car and go in the house to see what dad was doing. Then she'd come back and sit down. Then we'd wait. Then I'd get out and go in the house to see what he was doing. He would be aimlessly walking through the house checking for "stuff". "Dad! We've been waiting in the caaaaar!!" (that's me, with a snotty voice).
Then we're off. "I have to go to the bathroom!" (me) "You shoulda went before we left the house!!!" (dad)... then 20 minutes of bitching while we all argued about if he should stop to let me pee or not.
An hour later we'd pass a McDonalds. "Can we stop and eat?! I'm starving!" (christy). "You shoulda ate before we left the house!!!" (dad)
Then after days and days of traveling, we'd get 'out west'. Mom would have her deadly-PMS. Christy and I would have our deadly-candy boxes. Dad would be in that deadly-good-mood he was always in when mom was crabby. Our famous family story is as follows:
We were driving in Colorado, along a high mountian-side road. There were no gaurdrails at all, and the drop was steep and trecherous. My mom had PMS... but not just any PMS... She was a devil when she had PMS. Christy and I were in the back with our candy boxes, mine had boston-baked-beans and hers were lemon drops. We ate all of our candy in record time... and then... we comenced on the blowing. If you were ever a kid in the 80's I'm sure you knew what happened when you blew in certian candy boxes. High Pitched Whistles.
Mom: "SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!! You're going to KILL US ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Dad: "Darlene YOU SHUT UP!" (then laughs)
Me and Christy mimicking moms voice: "We're gonna DIEEEEE!"
Mom: "I'm NOT PLAYING! (crying) Do you see that drop off?! STOP IT!"
Dad: "haahah your mom is crying!"
Us: "haha" squeek squeeek
Two days of fighting followed.
Okay, so... fastforward to the not-so-distant future... Me, Mike, Midu and Leena were all going up north. I say, "Lets leave at 10am, so we can get there around 2".
11:20 and we're still home, and I am BITCHING. "COME ON! WE HAVE TO GO!!! I SAID 10!!". Everyone is basicly ignoring me. I'm feeling sick with stress. We finaly get rolling at noon. I am so mad I can't talk. I insist on driving (because I'm the best driver). Ten minutes after we leave Midu says "I'm hungry, can you stop at McDonalds?". I don't answer, I just fume. "baby?"... Fume...
Leena: "Yeah, I'm hungry too... stop at the next McDonalds"
Mike: (sits quietly)
Leena: "Mike? Are you hungry??"
Mike: (quiet)
Leena: "MIKE?!"
Mike: "I could eat"
Me: "JESUS CHRIST YOU GUYS!!!" then I launch into a 20 minute raging bitch session about how "You shoulda left before we left the house".
I am my both dad and mom while traveling... I get mad at the same stuff that pissed my dad off, but I rage like mom with PMS.
User Reviews
Submitted by NotApologizing (user info) at 2004-05-03 16:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
And to think, there are those among us who were THAT close to experiencing this!
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-04-29 09:04:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hah, insane, how can you say THAT and give me a +2?
Are you just +2ing me because you love me? Is that it?
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-04-29 08:43:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this post almost made me vomit
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-04-29 08:09:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
quality
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-29 06:32:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ok cool im mystiamoon_unit on yahoo and kmk7734 on AIM.
Seeing the pyramids has always been my dream.
With all the middle east turmoil I was kind of scared to go there.
It is my first choice of places to see around the world though.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-04-29 06:03:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Mysti- No, my parents both worked for Ford. I've been to Egypt twice... what's it like? I dunno how to summarize it in a review on uber. It's hot, dry... uh... different. I feel some weird attachment to the country... I dream about it still... I will probably go back a few more times.
My ex's family lived there, which is how I was lucky enough to go. It's difficult, socially, for one reason, and one reason only- I need a lot of private time, and arabs, culturally, are not "solitary" people. Everyone thought it was weird that I wanted time alone... besides that, everyone was great.
The last time I went to Egypt was the Christmas after 9-11. I was a little more wary of telling people I was American than I had been the first time I went there. It's pretty obvious, though. Me with my light hair and skin... I stuck out like a sore thumb. People went out of their way to come up to me and welcome me to Egypt.
I have a few posts about it:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/19679 talks about the bathrooms ;)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/22343 has a little more cultural stuff in it.
and- I'm corn_nugget78 on yahoo
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-04-29 04:49:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AUGH!
I was JUST talking about Boston Baked Beans and Lemonheads with Ewika and Steve. You're so great!
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-29 00:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Do you work at Fords? I work for GM, I love shut down every summer.
Not to turn this into a chat, but I have always wanted to go to Egypt.
What's it like? I'd love to see pictures if you have any.
Are they anti-American there right now?
Submitted by Malachewaii (user info) at 2004-04-28 22:15:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's an idea.. get some of those boston baked beans.. (those kick ass, by the way..) and shove them down anyone's throat who talks without permission. Make it your goal to see them choke. I promise a lot more pleasingly quiet road trips.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-04-28 22:10:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you're just insane.
Submitted by PopCorn80 (user info) at 2004-04-28 22:06:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Take it from me.. NEVER travel with Corinne. I still love you though!