To Whom It May Concern: (462 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.14 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tj <Malachewaii.at.aol.com> (View user info) at 2004-04-29 00:11:12 EDT
Hope
My heart once had something to call all it's own.
Held in it's grip was love, with emotions full grown.
Yet time is constant, and life moves on
Alas, her heart did the same, it seems forever gone.
With mine still slightly warm with love's true glow,
All happiness destroyed, with one devastating blow.
It has been said from a crippled heart, no love can be born
And Hell STILL hath no fury like that of a woman's scorn.
I lie in hope that my heart can endure this excruciating test,
My scars will heal, enabling my heart to do it's very best.
Nothing can soothe the trails of fire in my heart,
Our love is forever, we shouldn't have to be apart!!
I wake in the light of dawn's brand new day,
Crying aloud in pain, wishing things weren't this way.
A sudden calm consumes me, my heart beats strong and true,
We'll be together soon, my love. Just me. and You.
User Reviews
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-04-29 17:09:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well done for submitting poetry, but needs work.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-04-29 08:33:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I think it was a good idea... but the lines had inconsistant syllables, and when you are writing a poem that rhymes, it also needs a certain degree of rhythm.
-1 because I think if you tried a re-write and took out unnecessary words you could do better.
Submitted by BleedTheSky (user info) at 2004-04-29 08:15:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Women only THINK they're scary when they're mad. The truth is that the scariest thing women can do is withold sex from men. Unless theyre ugly, in which case the scariest thing they can do is offer it to them.
Submitted by Tummy (user info) at 2004-04-29 01:43:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it kinda inticed me
Submitted by finkboy21 (user info) at 2004-04-29 01:00:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2004-04-29 00:20:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Thats kill, with a p
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-04-29 00:20:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
very good