Bad Boys No More! (348 hits)
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Submitted by <c_badgal.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-05-06 07:35:11 EDT
The attraction to bad boys started as soon as i became aware of my yuk, eurgghh thoughts being replaced with mmmm ones for the opposite sex , around the age of 8.
Being the black sheep of the family,i always managed to disappoint my parents. So when i hooked up with the local bad boy at the tender age of 14 and later married him it was no big surprise to the family.
After 8 years of suffering the lesser fool's constant lieing, cheating,fighting and breathing (unfortunately he still is) we seperated. Surely from then on i'd give up on bad boy's.... no no, not i. For some reason I was only attracted to bad 'uns' and always within my social circle.
Scott got into the mix of our social circle, i liked him but nothing more than as a pal, he was just one of the lads. One evening whilst attempting to bowl, I hear one of my girlfriends slating Scott about his past, the numerous relationships he'd had, the dodgy dealings he was involved in, the way he used women just for the sake of using them. What was it with me?!? That night lust set in and all for Scott - I wanted him!
I knew Scott had once had his own tv repair shop, so when my tv started playing up it was the perfect opportunity to get him alone. I called scott and asked if at all possible he would be able to come over and take a look at the tv for me, he was happy to oblige, telling me he'd be with me in an hour or so.
Great!!! That gave me enough time to take a shower, shave my legs, wash my hair, brush my teeth, brush them again and to practise sexy smiles in the partially steamed up mirror.
The bell rang and i answered the door to a very hot and sweaty scott, he came in followed by his golden labrador. I beckoned him into the front room, as i stood describing the problem with the tv i couldn't help but to notice the dog sniffing scott's crotch. Scott didn't seem phased by it as he was giving the dog lots of fuss, however when the dog started jumping up at him he'd order him "down boy!". The sight of seeing scott flustered made me want to giggle but hold back i did. It was only when Scott knelt down infront of the tv, soon after to be knocked to the floor and shoulder humped by the somewhat overweight labrador, i couldn't contain my laughter anymore. The labrador must've smelled a bi tch in heat or something as he was going for gold. Scott stood to announce it was the first and last hairy bollock he'd had rubbed in his face. I fell onto the couch crippled with laughter. As i saw him and his best friend out scott turned back halfway down the drive and asked if i was going to call the dog in and maybe get him spayed... I replied that's your job as the owner... he looked puzzled and at that moment a woman i saw moving into the house a few doors down came pacing up the drive, she saw the dog looked to the sky with her hands clasped and thanked god. I was in fits of laughter at this point. Scott said he'd be round first thing in the morning and drove off.
My lust for bad boys fizzled out that night.... and all for seeing one of them humped by the new neighbourhood hound.
Thanks Funny (the dog formerly known as Honey)
If i ever the desire for badboys return's i'll be sure to go to the local dog pound and get myself a doggie.
User Reviews
Submitted by Dufflady (user info) at 2004-05-06 15:34:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-05-06 08:27:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Balloonknot, you mean you've had 2 hairy canine love spuds in your face huh?!?
My humour.... please forgive me. :-s
Submitted by BalloonKnot (user info) at 2004-05-06 08:12:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I've seen better (-1)
Submitted by p0ny_feeder (user info) at 2004-05-06 07:54:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not quite the post I thought I was reading... Very good..
I had a dog who was a big brute but calm as anything, he was the most mild mannered pooch anyone could ever think of having, seriously a cool dog. My friend didn't think so. My dog just wanted to hump him when ever he visited, it was hilarious. My dog - Angus - never did it to anyone else only my mate, who wasn't as strong as Angus who always over powered him. Just writing out it now brings back memories of my mate just laying there swearing at me and trying to get him off.
Quality
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-05-06 07:47:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Haha... I got humped by a female dog once. Anyone beat that?
She smelled like rotting beef.