Why England Sucks (tribute to Mr. Silverpants) (1646 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.46 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jothar (View user info) at 2004-05-07 13:23:37 EDT
Ridiculous, pompous, arrogant, obese, prissy. All Brits fit into most of these catagories. Now, don't get your "knickers" in a bunch, or go call the "bobbies," I have some real hard evidence to back me up.
Did you know that the average Brit eats 407 crumpets daily? That's enough to feed a whole bunch of Ethiopians! In addition to their compulsive crumpet munching, they also manage to drink 612 gallons of tea every week! How might one manage to drink so much tea? I have no idea!
Now the thing about England is that they sit there on their little rainy island and make fun of and criticize everything going on in other parts of the world, although the bulk of them seem to direct it all towards America. I don't understand this, as they suffer the same problems as we, but just aren't as cool as us.
Example:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1170787.stm
Yes, there are a large amount of Americans that are obese, but you arrogant bastards have got us matched. You've got nothing on America, so stop bitching, start driving on the right side of the road, and go to the dentist every now and again, would you?
User Reviews
Submitted by Emraren <Wiggy> at 2004-08-05 11:52:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That's a load of rubbish. Seriously. England probably doesn't have 407 crumpets in the shops, let alone down our throats. Do you realise that you have said that we brits eat 17 crumpets an hour. Bullshit.
Sure we like our crumpets - we've gotta have something to get the disgusting taste of syrupy american pancakes out of our mouths.
Have a nice day.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2004-08-01 00:52:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
england sucks because the food sucks
Submitted by Jothar (user info) at 2004-08-01 00:40:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thats awesome, he made an account just to bash my post, which wasn't even serious.
GO ENGLAND!
Submitted by chopper (user info) at 2004-06-05 17:27:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this has got me seithing
Submitted by chopper (user info) at 2004-06-05 17:26:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
why talk shit you idiot all those figures are plucked from the air and we english?? well i know i for sure are hard working people i make stuff for america which litteraly draws blood and this it the stuff i have to read about me i hate you lot
Submitted by Thanatos (user info) at 2004-05-07 15:47:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha crumpets.
Submitted by mizuchoudai (user info) at 2004-05-07 14:38:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I guess that I don't take kindly to people Brit-bashing. Not to be all emotional, but Britain always comes in to save the world when the shit hits the fan (WWII). Ok, ok, so they used to come in to TAKE over the world, but that's water under the bridge. Will you Yanks ever get over the American Revolution?
PS I'm looking forward to July 4th...my first holiday off in awhile.
And now back to my crumpets and tea, maybe some strawberry jam and a biccy while I watch the telly.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-05-07 14:36:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Stop bitibg on peoples' posts:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/32365
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-05-07 14:23:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by zealous_type (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:46:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My daily crumpet intake has NEVER exceeded 300 you filthy racist.
Other than that, well done on constructing a quasi-coherent article - quite a feat considering the American education system :)
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That last paragraph was nice.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AAHahahaha!
Quality.
Seriously though, most Brits don't hate americans
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:35:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Plus friggin' two for finding that article. But I don't hate the British.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:30:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/32457
UK?
Submitted by slowlyrotting (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:30:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
is crumpet munching anything like carpet munching? if so... count me in!
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-05-07 13:26:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It was going to be a -2, but this line made me chcukle.
"Did you know that the average Brit eats 407 crumpets daily?"