I am not badass. (3336 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.71 on 38 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jonukah (View user info) at 2004-05-08 23:59:03 EDT
Directly inspired by and spoofed off of Lisa's post, "I Am Badass"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/32569
I know sometimes you wonder, "Has Jonukah ALWAYS been such a wimpy, passive, total goofball?" For your information, I've been perfecting my goofiness for years, so don't fuck with me, okay, because I'll cry.
You may have read my story about how I discovered that my only precious memory of me as a badass was a complete and total lie. If not, here is some gratuitous linkage:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/27170
But I got to thinking, there must have been SOME point where I was a badass. Or, at least a pseudo-badass.
So, I starting sifting through various memories (I will spare you the inner dialogue this time, but only because I'm too tired) to see if I could find an instance of me being badass.
The first thing I thought of was my lucrative (HA!) wrestling career in Sophomore year of high school. Did I ever have a badass moment? Time for a stroll through memory lane.
I pulled out my team picture..........
User Reviews
Submitted by Zandy1123 (user info) at 2004-08-16 12:32:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-08-16 12:19:54 (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't care what any of you think... that smile is downright fucking PSYCHOTIC.
------------------------
yeah - I'll agree with that.
You've got the "guess which one I'm going to murder" grin...that's some freaky shit.
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-08-16 12:19:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't care what any of you think... that smile is downright fucking PSYCHOTIC.
Trust, I know a psycho when I see one. I didn't spend six years at psycho grad school for nothing.
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2004-05-12 17:59:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, but you were such a cute akward teen!
Submitted by spacemonkey (user info) at 2004-05-09 22:39:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've actually used lines like this before:
For your information, I've been perfecting my goofiness for years, so don't fuck with me, okay, because I'll cry.
Submitted by Sacrew (user info) at 2004-05-09 22:24:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Is that a girl on the WRESTLING team?
'Cause that'd be pretty sexy.
Submitted by Mr_Insanity (user info) at 2004-05-09 18:03:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HA HA, few things:
The one on the bottom right just doesn't look right, has that zombie/dead look.
And i'm sure the one second left on the middle row is in Harry Potter.
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2004-05-09 15:24:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That picture is priceless
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2004-05-09 15:18:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Not everyone can be a badass, it's ok, and as my rating says: I've seen better.
Submitted by drstrangedhruv (user info) at 2004-05-09 13:28:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Evil
Submitted by lush (user info) at 2004-05-09 13:15:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I still think it's a +2.
So there.
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2004-05-09 11:40:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you for holding a high opinion and sparing the -2, notanasshole, but I almost always preach brutal honesty and I should get whatever rating comes with it.....not that they matter.
Besides, one more -2 shouldn't bring the rating of this post down below a 1.24, which is my overall rating.
Not that I pay any attention to my ratings.
Submitted by Because I'm not an A-hole at 2004-05-09 10:53:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I won't ruin your rating.
It amazes me that you can spend maybe 10 minutes on a post like this, which is so absolutely far below what you are capable of, and everybody +2's you to death.
Plain and simple, this post really stinks. You could have done it so much better.
Because I am not an A-hole, I will remain logged out so as not to ruin the illusion that this post is a kicker of all ass, which it clearly is not.
And don't give me the "Well log in Mr. no balls and we'll see what you have to say then" routine. I'm sick of ruining your ratings so I just won't do it here. Like you care anyways.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2004-05-09 08:51:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Psh, loser.
Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2004-05-09 07:52:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldn't call that a 'smile'.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-05-09 03:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
High school wrestling kicks ass.
Submitted by mylittleponygirl (user info) at 2004-05-09 02:58:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The guy to your upper right looks like my English teacher...shes a woman ^_^
Submitted by Melany (user info) at 2004-05-09 02:55:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, marvelous!
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-05-09 02:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's ok sweety, I think you're badass. Like when you wear my slippers... and let me do your hair. That takes a real man.
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-05-09 02:14:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wrestling= Gay
'oops i accidently entered your exit hole'
However i do know what its like to look like a tard in pics. THATs why i never let n e 1 take my picture.
Submitted by lush (user info) at 2004-05-09 01:48:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like how you are sticking your arm in front of the guy on the right of you... nice.. that's right take the spotlight.
also, the whole bottom row looks weak... they must be the freshman or something
Submitted by BoOyah <PP.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-05-09 01:22:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Its a common fact that you are not supposed to smile on any team photos,
Except for the individual photos which would go to your family then its okay to smile,
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-05-09 01:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He's only smiling because that dude/chick to his left is massaging his cornhole.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:43:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:41:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahah! Gorgeous.
Submitted by your_brown_eyed_girl (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:36:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Boring
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:35:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:30:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha.
Submitted by Lucifer_Industries (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:24:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you move to Detroit, that will help your badassness.
Malone
Submitted by cokewithoutrumiswrong (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:19:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Cheers to not badasses!
Kris
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:14:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Does anyone else think the guy on the bottom left looks like Mr. Bean?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:13:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Razon? haha Sorry
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
He does look like he's gonna cry... hah Razon, good call.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:08:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The guy below you and to your left looks like he's about to cry.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know man, that's a pretty badass smirk.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:06:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow thaqt is pretty gutsy, you would have caught a beating on my team in highschool for a goofy smirk like that in the team photo.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:05:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And anyone can be tooted?
-- Homer Simpson, on tutoring
The Way We Was
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:03:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I totally just rated this...where'd it go?
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-05-09 00:03:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Because I am in no way badass either.