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The Balls Out Stupidty of Antidrug Ads (510 hits)

Category: General

Rating: 0.67 on 3 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Malone (View user info) at 2004-05-12 04:37:04 EDT


As the television industry is my real job outside the goldmine cashflow of Lucifer Industries, I get to watch a lot of it. For years now, my an incresing favorite of mine has become the anti-anything advertising propganda that gets slipped into the middle of my favorite shows. These spots are like little mini-dramas that take place in an alternate universe far removed from any reality we know. I have put more thought to some of these commercials than most passive viewers do and would like to get into some of it with my captive Uber audience.

The first spot I love to rip on currently is the anti-marijuana ad that many of you have perhaps seen. It begins with two parents who are getting all heated about finding some pot. At first it would seem that the father is angry with the mom over a dime bag. Then we see the mother screaming back at the father that it's no big thing. Doors are slammed. Suddenly the tables seem turned as the mother is screaming at the father over his bag of dope. He cowers in his room muttering a single reply "It was only a little pot!" before the door is again slammed in his face. This door slamming fest and screaming match lasts for :20 seconds.

Lo and behold near the end of the commercial the two of them were only preparing themselves to go have a talk with thier son/daughter about pot. Too big of pussies themselves to just talk to him they have to harden up a bit in peparation of many door slams and a solid defense of "What's the big deal? It was only a little pot!" I hope they have a D.A.R.E. pamphlet on hand to answer that one. Now what strikes me to be hilarious about this commercial is the assumption that the ad makes that the child is still in the house and is about to get the talk. I wonder what this commercial would look like from his perspective: A mind blowing situation has just erupted upstairs. Inbetween door slams, he overhears the unimaginable, mom and dad upstairs getting into a fight about weed?! Alright! I bet he was rolling one up just to go share with pops. Finally, a moment presents itself where father and son/daughter can bond on a level outside the typical family unit relationship.

Another good one being played over and over in my area is yet another anit-marijuana/gang advertisement. This one shows some aging black people getting all excited about arts and crafts while showcasing the children. The narrator rambles on about how there is nothing for kids to do except join gangs and get high. While this may be true in some neighborhoods, the solution to this problem is a scream. Dance classes. It would seem that all that kids need to get by on the straight and narrow is some traditional dance routines.

I can keep a kid off drugs, sign them up for Jazz Tap 101.

Finally, my last breakdown is of a different type of commercial. Every single user on this site has seen this ad. This one isn't an anti-drug spot, but it does feature a truck full of people on drugs. The scene opens up with five young and cool looking (obviously the producers opinion, not mine) guys riding in a Chevy truck. They all look blown out, or pissed off. Perhaps a mixed bag of the two, who's to say? Blasting on the radio is the very fuckable Shania Twain singing all about how good it is to be a woman. The douche in the middle back seat is singing along and doesn't seem to be aware of anyone else in the car. This is a true sign of somebody tripping balls on acid if I've ever seen one. Now, the rest of the young hipsters in the truck can't believe this guy. They try to put some distance between him and them by re-adjusting themselves. Even the driver rolls his eyes as he can't believe what this guy is singing. You can read the emotion in his eyes, they're saying "What a buzz kill this guy is. I hate this song." or "Pass me the blade in the glove box, this will be short and sweet."

Maybe it's just me, but all I can ask about this ad is, why in the fuck is the song on the radio then? WHY IS IT ON THE RADIO?! Again, if the dude in the back is such a fucking queer, then why is it on the radio, and better yet, why is it so loud? The answer: drugs.




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User Reviews


Submitted by Eric_Rice (user info) at 2004-10-17 14:54:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-05-25 04:04:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2


I didn't read it, so I don't know if it's good or not.

However, Balloon-Knot can lick my taint, and I also don't want you to have the mark of a solid -2 on one of your posts. This +2 is my gift to you, Malone. Enjoy.

Submitted by BalloonKnot (user info) at 2004-05-14 11:25:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

You double posting bitch.


Ballon Knot has spoken.


Marge: You don't have to join a freak show just because the
opportunity came along.

Homer: You know, Marge, in some ways you and I are very different
people.

Homerpalooza