Sympathy Fuck (1488 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 0.84 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by liam dunlop <Sicgrrl77.at.aol.com> (View user info) at 2004-05-13 15:21:04 EDT
After two years of no sex, I decided to pay for it. I waited a week for my sperm count to build up but the problem was I kept relapsing, ejaculating everywhere two, three days in. Push it to four. Push it to six. A month later and I was there. I hadn't touched myself for eight days, God help me.
Clean, shaven and tooled up, I left my bedsit and paced the streets for a phone box littered with calling cards. Among the many offers of a good fuck was a Polaroid. A self taken slightly out of focus glimpse of a young girl's white body screaming out for a sado masochist beating while blood ran from her wound down her slender thighs - got me hard and lost in the head like raw art out-priced and untouchable. She's the one, I thought. My Sicgrrl. Her name scrawled in black marker pen across the bottom of the photo - Nadine.
I dialed her number, a mobile, praying she'd answer since I was completely in awe by her image over the dime a dozen slag scum on offer. A female voice. I wrote the address down on the back of the photo, placed it into my coat pocket and limped as fast as I could to her flat. The time was 10 am on a Wensday, which I'd planed, since I didn't want to be on the rebound of some mid-lunch fucking happy hour or during the late night zombie two step crawl to the local hole when every mother fucker would be out in full force for some sucky fucky.
The only reason I didn't do this sooner was simply down to money. The kind of lady I wanted to express my fluids too, would cost me 80 plus. And what with all my porn DVD's, video's, magazine's, comic's and a sex doll, I kept getting distracted.
The girl in the Polaroid introduced herself as Mary, mother of Jesus. I later found out to no recollection from her at all, that she was so fucking high on brown, she couldn't even remember that day. It was weird, we didn't even have sex just got high together and talked. The drug's melted my lust and my erection, even though she seemed happy to act the whore. It was more like a tea party with Alice in Wonderland. I guess I played the Chesire Cat, smiling so much that my face ached hard the next day - which we spent touching each other like virgin's. Without the drugs though, I feel I would have been more like the Mad Hatter in a doll's house. I like doll's. Particularly the live ones.
I don't know why Nadine kept me as a lover especially as her clients offered her the world, but I believe it was because I was so vulnerable in her arms and would do anything she told me to. I'd fetch her crack at four in the morning and nip into Tesco's for snacks, toilet paper and foil. I'd wash up and clean the toilet and even clean her. I just obeyed because I was afraid of being alone again. I didn't squeak and that kept her purring. I didn't moan or complain or bitch about anything. I just followed orders and in return, I had a lover. And that's something in this day and age. You'd think in a First World Country that it'll be anything but a First World War of the sexes. And I was constantly on the front line wishing I could be safe in the arms of a lover.
And now that I was.
I intended to keep her.
I know my age had a lot to do with the forming of our relationship. I was young, naive and desperate, yet she could sense the love in me, that I wouldn't use her. But abuse her I did. I fucked up and failed to be the lover I promised myself the next chance I got to be. For there we were, a smackhead junky fuckhead loser and a crackhead junkie ho living together in a self-destructive dance, wailing, palm's out, hand shaking.
The thing is, if we wanted peace of mind, salvation and everlasting happiness then we should have checked our skull's into rehab. So much for one day at a time.
Tis pity I'm a fool and she's a whore.
If only I knew then what I know now about second chances then I wouldn't be here crying alone in this bedsit.
But two years after Nadine left me just like the two years before we met, I've found myself back in my own personal hell, desperate for sex again. And I can't face seeing another prostitute. I guess I don't need to.
Because I've got something better in mind.
User Reviews
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:04:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:47:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:36:09 (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't like this. I have a sick feeling in my stomach right now. I don't know why I don't like this. But I don't. In fact, I hate it.
And I am still not sure why.
____________________
If something disturbs it doesnt mean you should -2. The fact that the post invokes these feelings should warrant more than that don't you think ?
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I see your point. But the ratings are sort of a way to either reccomend (+2, +1) or not reccomend (-2, -1) a particular piece. This post made me feel ill, therefore I would NOT reccomend it. Much in the way that I wouldn't reccomend a book I didn't like.
So I gave it a -2. But I won't give it another one, because I have already rated and I don't want to be mean and spam it. Just because I didn't like it doesn't mean it's not good.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:00:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fiction, right?
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-05-13 20:48:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hi Curt.
Back from the dead?
Say hi to Courtney for me.
Submitted by scrotumlicker <my fat hanging balls@ballsweet> at 2004-05-13 17:35:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
talented
Submitted by jcricket (user info) at 2004-05-13 17:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good read.
stay off of the smack son.
Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2004-05-13 17:13:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahhh, never mind.
You are in fact male, and I can't even hit-whore right.
Damn Robitussin.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-05-13 17:11:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Interesting.....
Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2004-05-13 17:10:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Written well, good premise. I smell fiction. If, as your email hints, your a "grrl" props cause I know it isn't easy writing from a male point of view.
www.ubersite.com/m/31454
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-05-13 17:03:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Submitted by slowlyrotting (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:44:07 (#)
Ranking: -1
sorry, but paying for sex is just fucking sad."
That isn't the point, you pubic slice. It's an interesting read.
Submitted by Daeron (user info) at 2004-05-13 16:58:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Here's a suggestion: See a shrink and then kill yourself when high.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:47:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:36:09 (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't like this. I have a sick feeling in my stomach right now. I don't know why I don't like this. But I don't. In fact, I hate it.
And I am still not sure why.
____________________
If something disturbs it doesnt mean you should -2. The fact that the post invokes these feelings should warrant more than that don't you think ?
Submitted by whataefag (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:47:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that's a great story. you should re-write it (and complete it) when you're not so fucked up.
Submitted by slowlyrotting (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:44:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
sorry, but paying for sex is just fucking sad.
Submitted by shark25 (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:42:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good read.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:39:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!
You actually have a sex doll?
I always thought that they were gag gifts, and nothing else.
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:38:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"TRAINSPOTTING" who?...well read none the less
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:36:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't like this. I have a sick feeling in my stomach right now. I don't know why I don't like this. But I don't. In fact, I hate it.
And I am still not sure why.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:30:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
your going to be rapist now hey ?
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:27:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good writting. fiction or non?
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2004-05-13 15:25:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i feel a lot better about myself after reading this. thanks.