the farm... or... What I better never catch my nephews doing (624 hits)
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Rating: 1.86 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by The Nugget (View user info) at 2004-05-13 21:30:23 EDT
I grew up in a rural area. We had two police cars, 80 people in each graduating class, lots of farmers, lots of white people... My parents were city folk, but they moved out to the country when my sister and I were young, because they didn't want us growing up in Detroit.
Our favorite thing to do was play at the farm. It was about half a mile down the road, and "to be safe" we'd walk through the corn-field to get there, opposed to walking along the busy highway. When they were plowing the corn (or whatever its called.. harvesting?) we'd just take care to avoid the tractor. Sure, we'd hear stories on the news about the dangers of corn-fields and how easy it is to lose your sense of direction, and how many farmers inadvertently plow up kids or pets... but, hey, we were CAREFUL!
When we got to the farm, the first thing we did was climb up into the hay loft and look for kittens. We'd scamper over the wobbly bales of hay, careful not to smoosh any new kittens. Once in a while the stacks would shift, and we'd get a leg stuck between bales. We made a rule that we couldn't ever climb alone, we often used each other to pull ourselves free. I hate to admit it, but one time we found a mom cat feeding her kittens, and we thought "What does cat milk taste like?"... well, thank god we couldn't get the milk out.
After playing in the hay, we'd rush down to the cow-pen. Without hesitation, we'd swing our legs over the fence, and plop down in the pen... our feet and and ankles would be covered with poo, which we didn't mind, since we thought it was just mud. We'd push our way through the cows, which all seemed to collect near us. Once in a while they'd be humping, but we would just point and say, "Lookit that one, he must like us, he's trying to climb closer!!".
Then it was time for the pigs. We usually waited until feed-time, and we'd follow the farmer around, watching him fill the troughs with a sweet-smelling goo. The pigs would snortle and push each other around, but we didn't like the pigs much. They stank and had wiry hair. Once a month or so the farmer would take us into the pig-nursery. We'd get to see the huge fat momma pigs laying with their babies. There was always a pile of dead piglets by the door... the moms had a nasty habit of laying on their babies. We yelled at the moms, but things never seemed to change. They stank.
All of that seems fine and dandy, right?
I can say that my love and compassion for animals probably does have a connection with my summers spent at the farm... also, that's where my claustrophobia comes from.
Why?
My sister found a hole in the wall of the pig barn. She pried the metal plate up, and we poked our heads in. The silo! It was huge, and almost empty... the corn was just below the hole... maybe 1/10th full? "hello!!!" we called, to hear our voices bounce around, and come back to us. Christy was always the fearless one, and before I knew what was going on, she had squeezed through the hole, and laid in the middle of the pile of corn.
"Corinne, get in here!!". It just didn't seem right. "GOD, you're such a big baby, argh, I shoulda brought Becky, she is WAY more fun than you!!". Alright, that means I had to go in. I squeezed myself through the hole that was barely big enough to fit my small 7 year old frame. The second I got inside, I knew I had to get out. Christy was throwing corn around, her feet sinking in to the corn... she'd pull them up, kick corn, let them sink in again...
I tried to climb back out, but she grabbed me by the ankles. I kicked, she bit me in the shin, I kicked again, and she pushed me out. It didn't take her long to follow me, we could hear some machinery outside, and we wanted to go see what the farmer was doing.
Oh, he was getting ready to fill the silo with corn. Fancy that.
My nephews are just a little younger than we were when we did this stuff... I can barely stand to let them play in the BACK YARD without watching them... let alone play on a FARM.
Are they going to be big wimps, since they aren't allowed the same freedom I had when I was younger? Or will we just be raising the likelihood of them living a full life?
User Reviews
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-05-19 13:05:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The first time i ever saw a cow was when i was 18 in college in PA.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2004-05-15 00:24:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG UR FrUM by D3Tro1T!1!!!!A!@!E@
Do U kno Emin3m or k1d RocK?!?!!!//??/!
Submitted by Lucky (user info) at 2004-05-14 10:01:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
kitty porn
*smile*
Submitted by slowlyrotting (user info) at 2004-05-14 09:51:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ooooooooooooooooooh
de camptown ladies sing dis song
do dah! do dah!
de camptown racetrack 5 miles long
oh de do dah day!!!!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2004-05-14 04:54:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I think we should watch children, but only a little. Survival of the fittest is there for a reason. In fact, we may be a bit better off if all stupid people were killed as kids (before they get to sponge off the state).
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-05-14 04:46:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this would be about sex.
I want my money back.
Oh, good post.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-05-14 04:34:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
charming and infectious, though i was kind of hoping for some sort of gross or scary punchline.
"When they were plowing the corn (or whatever its called.. harvesting?)" - i like this sort of thing too
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-05-14 01:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you just made that up, the "Little Detroit" thing anyways...
I wish my parents were rich enough, or even smart enough to move me out of the city before puberty. It might be a blessing in disguise, because even though we moved to the western suburbs of Metro Detroit, I made many of my friends and "contacts" before the age of 13.
Anybody wanna buy some crack?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-05-13 23:47:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I live in the city now... not a very nice city, either. It's not as bad as Detroit, but it has been refered to as "Little Detroit" before... maybe. I may have just made that up.
Anyway... I grew up in the country, but I'm definatly a city girl. I feel much more well rounded than the people I'm friends with that grew up in the city, for sure.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-05-13 23:30:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Donitsu,
We used to have 'townies' send their kids out to stay on our farms in the school holidays at times.
Do you know what terror a few country kids can wreck on a 'tough streetwise' town kid translocated to the country.
Hell even the calves would have them shaking in their boots let alone the geese and the peacock.
Then of course the tame steers being raised for meat suddenly became huge agressive bulls that would stomp you to death if you went anywhere near their fence.
You should see the laughs we would have when feeding out and these animals came running towards the fence to get some hay.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-05-13 23:19:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've grown up in cities my whole life. +2 for me not relating to you.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-05-13 22:03:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i grew up on a farm initially and spent a lot of time on my uncles farm. The things we grew up with and did would make our over protective Governers hair curl these days.
Personally i reckon we are raising a bunch of couch potato whimps. We have over legislated and put people into a nanny state. These days people expect to be protected from themselves and if they do something stupid they look for someone to sue. After all it has to have been someone elses fault.
When we were kids and we would walk across a slippery log down in the plantation that had fallen over the drainage canel forming a "bridge". We knew that if we fell in we would be up shit creek because the walls were steep and the water fast and murky.
And when we were out in the middle of the lake in the canoes we had formed out of a sheet of corrugated iron and pitch we had scraped off the road. We knew if we sank we were in the shit.
So some kids would drown, some would fall out of trees and break a leg or head. However we grew up with a sense of adventure, and exploration. These are the sort of qualities we are taking away with the whole insistence on swimming pool fences, and the expectation that legislation will protect us from ourselves.
Take a look at what has happened because of the huge hike in public indemnity insurance. A friend of mine used to have a small business face painting kids at local school fetes, shopping centres and such. From this she essentially made pin money and the kids had a lot of fun.
Her public indemnity insurance was $150 per year. After a couple of major claims by other individuals on doctors and local councils for what I would consider spurious incidents. Her insurance premium jumped to $7000 initially and then she was refused totally, effectively closing her business.
WHo has the biggest loss? In my book it is the kids.
Submitted by ugaly (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:45:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ya well...atleast you didn't hear this
kid singing: "chewy chewy tootsie roll"
mad father: "JUNIOR. PUT THAT BACK IN THE CAT BOX"
which tastes worst...kitty tit or kitty butt?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:42:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hah Kristin, you naughty girl. We can see it started early with you!
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:39:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh dear.
My best friend and I visited her cousins on their farm one time. I don't think we were more than 10 or so at the time. Anyway, we paid her cousin Jed, who was maybe 5 at the time, to put his weiner in a goat's mouth for a dollar.
I'm going to hell.
Submitted by DancingHobo (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:36:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well, thank god we couldn't get the milk out.
+2 for kitty porn
Submitted by KoolWang (user info) at 2004-05-13 21:34:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
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