Candy Canes and Mushroom Clouds (515 hits)
Category: HumorRating: -0.22 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Major_Crane 82nd Squadron RAF (View user info) at 2004-05-20 21:32:17 EDT
Here's a story I wrote in 8th Grade for a math class. I don't know why it was for a math class but it's kind of funny to read what you once wrote. The title is true to what a I wrote as an eigth grader.
Saddam was thinking hard about the idea. It would mean giving up all he lived for, but he would get his greatest wish. It had all started when he was talking to the Christian mission he had imprisoned. He was curious about this big holiday the westerners celebrated every December. What was this magical creature that slid down the chimney and hid presents under the tree? It appealed to him greatly. That was why Saddam Hussein decided to become a Christian. The plan was perfect. He merely wrote down his utter most desire on a sheet of paper and had it shipped to the North Pole. That was how Saddam was to get his nuclear bomb. He couldn't let anyone except his most trusted advisors this would be a very risky operation. If this got into the media (the one he didn't control) it could mean dire consequences for him and Iraq. This would all be conducted in utter secrecy in the innermost chambers of his vast mansion that accounted for 90% of all the shelter in Iraq.
December came and the letter was sent. Because of the desert climate Saddam had a fireplace and chimney installed. Christmas Eve came and Saddam set goat's milk and cookies on a table next to his Christmas tree. Fortunately Saddam had forgotten one crucial factor of the Christmas Tradition. Santa knows whether you are naught or nice and Saddam never had the right guidance as a child. So Saddam woke up and ran down the stairs and was greeted by a lump of coal.
User Reviews
Submitted by reallybored (user info) at 2004-05-22 01:28:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
MORON
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2004-05-21 03:41:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not sure why, but I chuckled.
Submitted by SausageKing (user info) at 2004-05-21 02:25:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Next time you write an essay, do it like this and post it on this site. You will get +2's out the yang:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/26825
http://www.ubersite.com/m/26844
Submitted by FearBenzene (user info) at 2004-05-21 00:54:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by BoondockSaint at 2004-05-20 23:01:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 just cause I pictured Saddam as this fat little boy with a cupcake when i read this.
Submitted by euripidestrousers (user info) at 2004-05-20 22:26:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-05-20 22:08:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It amused me.
Submitted by peyotesands at 2004-05-20 21:58:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
crap.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-05-20 21:42:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
-2 for whatever the hell that was I just read
+2 because you wrote it for math class (WTF???)
Were you tripping at the time?
Submitted by MoneyG (user info) at 2004-05-20 21:41:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Rixes (user info) at 2004-05-20 21:37:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I clicked on this post and was greeted by a lump of shit. -1